Poppycock is:
Tom Denning - Vocals
Eric Westfall - Lead Guitar
Aaron Holladay - Rythym Guitar
Shawn Snyder - Bass Guitar
Kyle Fulford - Drums
Becca Strain - Cowbell and Tamborine

All lyrics and music written by Eric Westfall except where noted.

Happy Land Hanson Sucks Tamigothci Serial Killer Fairy God
Ed's Tofu Diner Rocks for the Teacher
Farmer Joe Norm My Best Friend Moo

Happy Land

We're so happy sitting in the sun.
Just relaxing having lots of fun.
Little children running all around.
Pretty flowers growing from the ground.

Oh isn't this place great,
sitting in the sun all day.
Oh isn't this place grand,
happy, happy, happy land.

Then you fucking die!
You stupid fucking slut!
You can lick my sac!
You can kiss my butt!

Repeat

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Farmer Joe

You and me should go away
to a place I used to play.
It's my treehouse,
it's my friend.

It is back in the trees.
Lots of snakes and lots of bees.
It's real far
but I don't care.

We used to go back there every single day.
Me and all my friends really liked to play.
That was until that mean old Farmer Joe
cut our treehouse down, and why he did it I don't know.

Well then, on that day
I knew Farmer Joe had to pay.
So I went to Wal-Mart
and bought a gun.

I went over to his farm,
cut the wires on his alarm,
went inside,
and shot him dead.

When Farmer Joe was dead everyone rejoiced.
We went back and built a treehouse better than the first.
Me and all my friends were oh so very happy.
Never again will anyone harm our tree.

Cause if you mess with our tree your gonna
DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE!!!

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Hanson Sucks

Well I turned on the T.V. just the other day and guess what I saw.
Three queer brothers playing their guitars and singing about "Where's the Love"

Oh, Hanson sucks. They really suck. Hanson sucks!
Oh, Hanson sucks. They really suck. Hanson sucks!

Well I didn't turn on the T.V. the other day and guess what I didn't see.
That music channel that plays only Rap and R&B.

Oh, MTV sucks. It really sucks. MTV sucks!
Oh, MTV sucks. It really sucks. MTV sucks!

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Ed's Tofu Diner

I saw you standing there. You barely noticed me.
Thoughts in my head of what you want me to be.
My mind is racing. Don't know what to say.
I think I'd be happier if I was gay.
But I couldn't stand it, being a fag.
So I went home to load my 44mag!

So I go home. Become a chick.
Put on my red lipstick.
Drive on out to Bullwinkle's.
Pull out my gun and shoot myself between the temples.

It's not so bad being lonely and straight.
Instead I'll go home and masturbate.
I put on my housecoat. It's made of flannel.
Turn on the T.V., ooh, the Playboy channel.
I just threw up, I got the flu.
But look at me, I'm just like you!

Will I scream, when I die.
When I close my eyes forever.
In my eternal rest.
I might as well drink like it's Oktoberfest.

Oktoberfest, is the best.
Oktoberfest, is the best.
Oktoberfest, is the best.
Oktoberfest, is the best.

Lyrics by Josh and Eric
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Norm

My car is more than a toy.
It's a beast, its my pride and joy.
Little blue camry, it's really fast.
Little rice burner, turbo charged gas.
She don't look like much, but it can fly.
Had a little wreck, and I almost died.
I took it in to get it fixed.
Windows still don't work and snakes have two dicks.

You stupid piece of shit.
Why don't you get rid of it.
I hear it all the time.
That she's a real hot ride.

I'll pick you up and drive you around.
When I kill you, it won't make a sound.
Your little brother is a real punk.
Stab his ass and shove him into the trunk.
What I did it was a mistake,
so I drove my car into a lake.
I'm still at large, so watch your kids.
And remember that snakes have no eyelids.

You stupid piece of shit.
Why don't you get rid of it.
I hear it all the time.
That she's a real hot ride.

GOD DAMNIT!!!!!!

You stupid piece of shit.
Why don't you get rid of it.
I hear it all the time.
She's a real hot ride.

Lyrics by Josh, Eric, and Tom
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Tamagotchi Serial Killer

Gonna drive to Walmart,
Gonna make ‘em pay
for all those beeping noises
I hear everyday.

Rip em out of the package,
push a couple buttons.
Gotta get ‘em ready
for their final bludgeon.

I'm a Tamagotchi Serial Killer.
Tamagotchi Serial Killer.

Put ‘em in a pile,
stack ‘em really high.
They make a lot of funny noises
when they're gonna die.

Get the gasoline,
you know what I'm gonna do.
Turn ‘em all into a
messy plastic goo.

I'm a Tamagotchi Serial Killer.
I'm a Tamagotchi Serial Killer.

Tamagotchi x 16

You're never gonna catch me.
That's all I have to say.
If they weren't made of plastic
I'd eat ‘em everyday.

You could all be happier
if they were all gone,
so lets bring the
Tamigotchipocalypse on.

I'm a Tamagotchi Serial Killer.
I'm a Tamagotchi Serial Killer.

Lyrics by Tom
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Rocks for the Teacher

Came into Chemistry late today.
I was walking in a funny way.
And I had a mean nasty rash.
Cause I had a bag of cocaine up my ass.
Uhhhhh!!!!!!

Baking soda's cheap and the water's free.
You can tell who smokes it cause they got no teeth.
I love the assignments that I get in schoo'
Cause makin' crack for teacher isn't hard to do.

Rocks for the teacher.
I got the rocks for the teacher.

Took a field trip to the elementary.
Where we sold our crack to all the little G's.
They all have to go home hungry.
Cause they had to pay with their lunch money.
Uhhhhh!!!!!!

Officer Friendly comes out to supervise.
Then he goes and pays off his mofia ties.
My teacher is so proud of me.
Cause my crack is free of impurities.

Rocks for the teacher.
I got the rocks for the teacher.

Crackwhore stay away from me.
Crackwhore stay away.
Crackwhore stay away from me.
I don't want your disease.
Repeat

Rocks for the teacher.
I got the rocks for the teacher.

Put that in your crack pipe and smoke it!!!

Lyrics by Tom and Eric
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My Best Friend Moo

Ducks quack, and pigs oink.
But they don't do anything for me.
Horses in the stable neigh all day.
But I don't care.
I'd be happier if I was in a barn.
Inside a great big dairy farm.
I would get a cow and take it home.
I'd call it my own.

I think I'm gonna call you moo.
So that when I call you.
You'll know just who I'm talking to.
My best friend moo.

I'd feed you hay.
All you could eat.
I'd drink your milk all day
even though I'm lactose intolerant.
I'd hang a cow bell.
Around your neck.
You are so beautiful.
With your black spots, yeah.

I think I'm gonna call you moo.
So that when I call you.
You‘ll know just who I'm talking to.
My best friend moo.

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Fairy God

I'm a little fairy god.
Siting on your window.
Fucking all your animals.
And then I'm gonna kill you.

You don't know that I'm here.
I'm hiding on the shelf.
You don't think I can kill you.
Because I'm just a stupid elf.

I'm a little fairy god.
Siting on your window.
I'm a little fairy god.
And I'm gonna kill you.

I'm a little fairy god.
Watching from the shadows.
My mind is swimming,
with thoughts that you will never know.

Screams of terror.
A sound I know all to well.
This is just the beginning.
Welcome to my hell!

I'm a little fairy god.
Siting on your window.
I'm a little fairy god.
And I'm gonna kill you.

Solo

I'm a little fairy god.
Siting on your window.
I'm a little fairy god.
I'm gonna fucking kill you.
I'm a little fairy god.
Master of disfunction.
I'm a little fairy god
Lord of destruction.

You will fear me.
YOU WILL FEAR ME!
Oo ah ha hA HA HA HA!!!

Lyrics by Tom and Eric
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Poppycock