A really short short Lara story in seven (also tiny) parts
Tim Fletcher, 1998
On the first day she arrived at the University. The gigantic placard on the outside proclaimed the Neuwerth Archaeological exhibition open, and Lara Croft mingled pleasantly with the other guests. The exhibition was organised more along the lines of a convention, with the various attendees staying in the accommodation provided by the University. On the first day they saw newly recovered pottery from the Russian steppes, and vases from a thousand or more years of Chinese dynasties.
On the first night, Lara slept easily in her bed. The lodgings were sparse – they were halls of residence after all – but comfortable enough, and certainly better than a cave or riverbank. On the first night she dreamt of green fields and birds singing an the men she had killed and seen die staring up at her. But she had grown used to such things and they bothered her little.
On the second day, they saw more of the exhibition. Of particular interest to Lara was the so-called Orb of Naroni, an in fact unidentifiable artefact that had been fished out of the Mexican Gulf. It was a small ball, about three or so inches across, with a gold-flecked surface and two uncut gems protruding from its surface apparently at random. It rested on a blue velvet cushion, inside a glass case, protected by several security beams. Quite some protection for this type of exhibition, though little compared with the main attraction. But that awaited for another day.
On the second night Lara slept less comfortably, and her dreams were taunted by an indistinct image that hovered on the edges of hr morphean vision. A small ball with two bright points set into it, that glinted in light that wasn't even really there.
On the third day, the guests saw more of the pieces. Gold from the Incas and flawless pottery from the Africas. The guests, that is, except for Lara. She spent the third day in the room with the orb. The walls of the room were darkened, in order to draw attention to the gilded ball which gleamed and sparkled in the lit case. Lara sat on a small seat near the display, though sometimes she got up and leaned as near to the glass as she could without tripping the alarms. Her absence from the main party was noticed, but not commented on.
On the third night Lara slept fitfully when at all. Every time she closed her eyes all that filled her mind was the glistening golden sphere, its gems staring out at her like two sorrowful but merciless and accusing eyes. She tossed and turned amidst the white sheets, though never uttered a word.
On the fourth day Lara thought of nothing other than returning to the orb chamber to resume her vigilant staring. Its enchanting glimmer kept her captivated, and under the burning intensity of her constant gaze she was sure she saw it judder, ever so slightly, and then move around a little. At five-thirty, when the rest of the guests had retreated for dinner and the evening's entertainment, Lara hid herself in a cleaning cupboard as the staff locked up and turned off lights. At five-fifty, she emerged from her hiding place to view her obsession once more. At seven-ten on the fourth day, Lara, with all the skill she had honed in her ten-year career, reached delicately between the security beams and removed the orb without so much as a squeak.
On the fourth night Lara did not sleep at all. She lay on her bed and cradled the beautiful, twinkling orb before her, not realising that she had not blinked in over twenty hours.
On the fifth day the fact that the Orb of Naroni no longer resided in its case was noticed, and with some alarm. The fact that Lara Croft was not present for the day’s events, and also the accounts of several of the staff attesting to the fact that she had spent the last two days staring at the artefact, led to an immediate investigation of her room. Of her, or the orb, or of any of her belongings there was no sign.
On the fifth night Lara crept to a place in the forest just outside the University grounds. This was a very special place, a place where certain occult lines of power conjugated, apparently by chance. Lara knew where to go because the clearing was calling to her, its presence a beacon in her mind. In the small stretch of cleared forest floor, she set the glittering golden orb down on the ground and uttered an incantation that was brought to her lips by a method she did not understand and for the moment did not care about. The effects of this on the artefact were impressive to say the least, as a series of glowings, outpourings of smoke and bursts of donner and blitzen resulted in a towering demon creature, resplendent in its horns, wings, shining eyes and lashing tail. This did not seem to surprise Lara, and as it trampled away across the forest she curled up quietly to sleep in the clearing.
On the sixth day she came to her senses, and realised what she had done. The social ramifications of having stolen and subsequently lost a priceless artefact were few; a couple of well-placed calls and a little loose change solved that. The main problem was that there was now (unless Lara had imagined the whole affair) a very large and presumably rather dangerous demon on the loose. On the sixth day, in the early afternoon, she acquired for herself a pair of Mac-10s, though it would probably be better for you if you didn't ask where from, and made plans for nightfall.
On the sixth night she made her way out into the forest, to hunt. The trail was not hard to forest, as the thing had toppled whole trees in whatever angry path it had taken. At the clearing Lara found tiny golden shards, the only remains of the orb that had kept it prisoner for some unknown length of time. Several hundred metres down the line she found the thing, asleep bizarrely enough, and with its arousal a vicious battle ensued. The outcome of the violence was a ripped t-shirt, a small amount of blood, an unpleasant number of discarded bullet casings, and a very large man-shaped smoking smear on the ground. Within the burned, blackened patch were a number of bullets equal to the number of casings (save for six which were later discovered in a nearby tree) and a pair of small, uncut gemstones.
On the seventh day, Lara Croft returned home to Surrey. Thanks to her not inconsiderable influence, there was no official investigation or inquiry. Events were put under the catchall and oh-so-useful tag of gang violence, though no-one sought to question why these gangers had never been seen before and never were again. Lara was disappointed to have missed most of the exhibition, and to have caused, however inadvertently, the destruction of an irreplaceable treasure. Still, at least she, uniquely prepared to deal with such situations, had uncovered it and not some other poor fool.
On the seventh night Lara slept in her own bed, amidst all the trappings and artefacts that made up her estate, and slept well. Or as well as can be expected.