Ladies and Gentlemen... please welcome...
The RGMW Outtakes!
[just to get it into the head of our fuckwit friend in the seventh row...]
> Hell yeah, I like to steal [underwear] off the clothesline and parade around the
> house in it. It would probably be even more exciting if I could get the
> nerve to steal someone else's.
> Stay here for a week and you'll be pulling the wings off flies.
> Please note that the use of all adjectives are the opinons of the author
> and do not necessarily reflect actual excitement or in fact for that
> matter any sort of genuine or implied connection with reality at all
> That's just cheesy. I might expect that of Eldar, but not
> Macedonians.
> Pommy pooftas. As distinguished from Kiwi pooftas, German pooftas, French
> pooftas, Brazilian pooftas, Chink pooftas, etc.
> Where's the Story Monster gone anyway? Does he send postcards?
> ATTENTION NEWSGROUP!
>
> IF YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL 16 YEAR OLD GIRL WHO WANTS TO HANG AROUND MY
> HOUSE WITH MINIMAL CLOTHING ON, PLEASE CONTACT ME. NO Y CHROMOSONES,
> PLEASE.
> I've got that Necromunda book in really execellent condition, only
> read twice, by my Grandmother on Sundays, and she was dead.
> I was thinking a spiffy pair of sequined Doc Martens. Practical and
> elegant.
> Because you've been sniffing the washing powder again in the mistaken
> belief you found your mother's coke stash.
> It could be real classy and piss champagne.
> I'm sorry, but your posts are violating guideline 5 of our IP policy
> (damaging the image of RGMW) by not posting homo-erotica or flaming
> somebody. If you don't stop immediately I'm afraid we will be forced to
> pretend that we have the power to make you.
> I've decided for my own safety not to attempt to make jokes about screwing
> around any more, after Big Al decided to send that one to the missus via
> ICQ while he was talking to her.
> I went to the Mountains of Nepal, where I was steeped in the ways of the
> Ninja Death-Commando Warriors by a learned and wizened figment of my
> imagination
> Since I'm in the outtakes, does that mean I'm not a newbie anymore?
> Fiery is one thing. Taking pleasure out of scrotum-smashing is another.
> After reading that guestbook, I'm going to take a shower. For, like,
> three hours. I feel unclean.
> To whom it may concern - clinical studies have shown that 89.3% of those
> surveyed suggested that you might wish to try inserting a saguaro cactus
> into one or more of your bodily orifices.
> Dear sir, please be advised that our board of directors has suggested that
> you use a cheese grater for your next masturbatory exercises.
> w0W j0o R l33T3r tH4n 3r1K s3Tz3R!!!!!!!!1
> Thanks to you, I now can't get excited when I see women in skin-tight,
> black clothing. You'll be hearing from my lawyer...
> They're not having -sex- with the Hamsters, they just use them as Furry
> Condoms.
> Because if its one thing I know about Americans, its that some of them
> have strange views on other countries (at least the ones they've heard of).
> YOU can't! YOUR ISP was killed by the POPE'S Swiss GUARDS in VIETNAM!
> Thanks for your time...now I will return you to the latest adventures
> of 'Setzer is an asshole and buttslams Iranian Goats.'
> Oh, so I'm being compared to apartheid now, am I? I'm moving up in the
> world.
> Why are people from other countries so foreign?
> Naffunki's sore because everyone insulted his TV.
> Since we are in the majority, and I
> am a firm believer in democracy, I believe we have the right to order
> you to shut the fuck up.
> Likewise, O Pork Rind of Sexual Pleasure.
> (Disclaimer: The above list should not be used to infer that I watch
> Australian soaps. On the contrary, I watch Australian soap stars' arses).
> No, I think that his mother spent so much time during pregnancy bent
> over for sailors that he became doubled-up in the womb and as a
> result his head grew up his arse prior to birth.
> Sorry? You make a shit hole by DESTROYING Wales as we know it?
> Dingos aren't very snuggly, and their fur is too wiry. Wombats are much
> better company on a lonely night...
> GorkaMorka is selling like lo-salt pickled broccoli.
> Actually, political correctness is something all us minorities thought up to
> fuck with white people's minds. And until Whitey starts sitting in the back
> of the bus and learns to say, "Yessum, sir. I'm sorry" on command., PC
> hasn't gone far enough.
> {I started this thread, so it's bloody well going to include some dancing
> girls -got it!}
> Bugger me, teaching egotism and arrogance to a Frenchman. The world really
> is going to end...
> P. S. The above is derived from an original work by God. All comments and
> queries can be directed to him at Jehovah@Mt.Sinai.com
> Brixton will feel the wrath of my water pistol.
> And once again Alister successfully fends off all the competition to
> walk off with the prize for Innuendo-Spotting (Easy Level)..
> -[deleted], whose thoughts and ideas are solely his own and do not,
> in any way, reflect those of Jefferson Lab or its staff. Unless of
> course there is any money to made off those ideas, in which case the lab
> says: "Gimme, gimme, gimme!"
> Oh, so you don't post flames? Where can I get rose tinted glasses like
> yours?
> [deleted] will fit in well here. He has a brain, doesn't post stupid
> opinions, make inflammatory remarks he can't back up, brag of proof he
> can't back up, isn't universally hated by the entire NG, and probably
> wouldn't need surgical assistance to have his head removed from his arse.
> This bloody well better not end up in the outtakes unless you include the
> words BIG PENIS.
> Cf Setzer/Tubman flamewars of '99, the 32nd occasion Mr Setzer Jr posted for
> the last time.
> And here I was imagining people with an Octopus Complex.
> So you use the Dark side to enhance your ability to run like a sissy girl?
> Intriguing.
> "Rob a dub, dub, Three men in a Rob, and what would those three men be. The
> faggot, the Setzer, the web-address-faker, ugly bastards all three."
> I will post in HTML if I want to. It is in my newsgroup reader, so that
> means that Usenet must not have any rules against it, otherwise the option
> wouldn't be there.
> Orange dreadlocked beards and uncomfortable body modification is pretty
> much the going rate in the gamer scene.
> You can see clearly now your brain has gone?
> Any random mention of giant lizards, games featuring well endowed women,
> etc. are the property of their respective companies, cartels, etc.
> ...The Daemon formerly known as Prince?
> I wish I was a test tube baby. There would have been much more to see
> during that first nine months.
> If I didn't think you worshipped the very ground I walked on, I'd say you
> were taking the piss.
> Exactly _HOW_ do testicles help someone to commit an act of murder?
> This FAQ was not stolen from the Realm of Inisfail.
> I just hope they call at a decent hour this time - and A.M. is not decent.
> I've got positive proof that
> you're a Ugandan transvestite, but I'm not posting it either.
> If you would like to order Alister's self enjoyment manual, Coming to
> Grips With Myself, or I Choked the Chicken, But I Did Not Choke the
> Deputy, call 01-02-555-GROPE-ME.
> Ignoring the fluff is like sleeping with your cousin!
> The regulars here
> possess some marvelous, godlike qualities, that allows them to belittle and
> insult other members of the internet community, without fear of retaliation.
> I DON'T LIKE FUCKING JIMI!
> I thought you preferred the more politically correct terms like faggot.
> Fear us, for you never know when we will become bored enough to come after
> you.
> Of course, you can always just blame all this on rgmw being a bunch of
> whiny beards, who aren't serious gamers anyway. It's always worked for
> everyone else when they disagree with us.
> I'm happy to leave wars out of it, but you had to mention Vietnam...
> This NG isn't just a group of waistrels and worthless nothings. At the very
> least, the same level of waistrels and worthless nothings that haunt the
> mailing list.
> This guy has personally attacked one of us and that right is reserved for the
> members of the NG only.
> One was a stupid, smug, tall idiot(sort of like Big Al, but smartly dressed,
> and non-deviant), and a small idiotic, incredibly thick person who follows
> him around(like Little Al).
> It's not medicine, it's magic pixie dust. From Colombia.
> You're just jealous, Mr "I Wish I Lived In A Real Country"
> It's Cambodian. It was specially translated by a team of Latvian
> chimpanzees into Swahili, and then read out by parrots with Down's
> syndrome. By a happy coincidence, it sounded like Australian acting.
> What else do you need in life? I think the outtakes hold the secret to
> everything.
> I personally found that to have female player, you have to find a group of them
> and first induce them alone.
> Taking drugs and reading Stephen Hawking is good. Not taking drugs and reading
> Stephen Hawking is bad.
> You actually replied with an informative post. Are you feeling ok?
>
>
> I think you have repressed feelings toward your mother. You want to have sex with
> her and kill you father. My advice is to drink heavily and begin using cocaine. It
> worked for me.
>
>
> I enjoyed it. Baz, eat someone else. Er, only not me.
> No, I'm a musician; I can count to 5.
> Please don't say I remember something from Star Trek.
> I'd trade my left penis to be normal.
> *insert comment without any real content here to continue the thread*
> Then it stops because I can't think of a worse insult than American.
> I have yet to know of a single Californian
> that knows of the world outside of the San Fernando valley.... "Germans? Aren't
> they, like, those guys who lived long ago?"
> Nothing more warming to a father's heart than to hear his little princess
> scream out: "HA HA! I'm Berzerk! DEATHBLOW! Kill the Gobbos! Die you little
> green savages!"
> That's ok, I'm still waiting for the Blood Patch for Xtreme Barbie
> Lipstick Assault...
> No wonder I am an atheist. I cannot blindly follow anything.
> The newsgroup's own Fluff Nazi League... er, sorry, Fluff
> People's Collective, or whatever they are calling themselves now,
> Just because it's on Usenet doesn't mean it's a personal attack.
> He has a lot on his mind, and we all know that's never been a load-bearing structure
> at the best of times.
> Does that mean I have had my heterosexuality confirmed by being omitted from
> your address book? Seems like a rather odd way to do it really.
> Ghetto style: finding six of your friends to help you roll a pensioner
> because you're all too pissweak to manage it on your own. Even with guns.
> You use a spell-checker? Ewww, that's a real turn-off, you know.
> RGMW. Come in peace, stay in peace, leave in peace. Otherwise leave in pieces.
> oh, and i never use caps either. this has no relevance on this subject.
> i just felt like pointing that out. so there.
> Is that a word? And if it is, I bet I spelt it wrong...
> America didn't lose the vietnam war.
> I died. Which sort of means I don't get to post as much now.
> I don't know if it's the blessing, but Gin & Holy Water is fab!
> I just checked. I'm still not from Iowa.
> He was also rendered deaf in one ear by a
> practical joke involving a US artillery piece
> I've got a Get Out Of Unwanted Situations Free card.
> If it looks like a Troll, smells like a Troll, and says something really
> fucking dumb, then it's probably a Troll.
> I mean, imagine it. A sexually ambiguous redneck with access to almost
> unlimited supplies of booze. It's too scary for words.
> Bugger off. I've read funnier things in the Watchtower.
> Your witty comebacks lack...wit.
> You had better know the quote or I'm taking away your gay license.
> I order you not to flame anyone for at least one week. Is that clear?
> Not for one week, even if Alec Peters comes back to announce his
> engagement to his new life partner ROB.
> If your mind was any narrower, the local council would be proposing plans
> for a bypass.
> Just how does one "run like fuck"? Does it involve a lot of stickiness?
> OK, that means I get to try and rape myself.
> The server was down for a short while on Monday. (i.e. until I came in on
> Tuesday morning and rebooted it.)
> Now look here, you arrogant little toerag, I happen to be a step-child
> bastard and I will *not* tolerate being compared to WebTV!
> I still want to see Hollywood Hogan run for Prez, and then get it. Then
> you'd all truly get what you deserve.
> Hello, I'd like to say welcome to the group and please die in hell.
> I know it's kind of unorthodox and untraditional and all that, but what
> the hell - here's a sensible reply.
> You're beginning to sound just like Evil Homer. I've yet to decide
> whether this is a good or a bad thing.
> You'll learn. Think of this group like prison. You only get respect if
> you flame someone or become someone's bitch.
> Well, to be fair, if GW *hadn't* started making things up out of their
> arses all those years ago, this NG wouldn't even exist.
> Oh yeah, and the Pope is a black jewish lesbian prostitute from Singapore.
> God dammit! Stop trying to turn me on! A female gamer that can program?
> I am *not* a prostitute. Not a professional one, anyway.
> Doesn't sound any different to any of the newspapers printed here. My
> grandmother could proofread better, and she's dead. Except that they tend
> to be more of the idiot header variety like "Gays caught in back passage -
> Police probe uncovers sex ring".
> Is this an private insult-fest, or can anyone join?
> #| <-- Jimi's hash pipe
> Why do all of my great days now seem to revolve around being allowed to
> sleep past 9am?
> And kids, don't forget to check out beer once you turn 14. In only four
> years time you can drink it legally!
> IIRC, the French tend to surrender as soon as they find out that the other
> side owns guns.
> Sorry, you're wrong there. This *is* my own personal newsgroup, and you
> can all lick my boots like the grovelling scum that you are.
> Erm... I think you're confusing your career as an evil supervillain
> with that of a psychologist.
> I read every message of every thread that does not
> involve homo/pedi/besti/Bazi-rotica.
> [followed by the most gigantic snip since Gargantua's circumcision]
> I thought we told you before - no summoning Elder Gods to usenet. It hogs
> too much bandwidth...
> ObDisclaimer: I am not a smoker. I am, however, an asshole.
> It's the mysterious Area 51 of the GW world. It's exact location is a
> mystery, as are the activities carried out there. Although GW personnel at
> the base have categorically denied that they have the captured,
> cryogenically frozen bodies of several Squats in a hidden underground
> bunker.
> And after the spanking, the... I think I'll wait for the chicks to show up.
> Just wondering... considering the way that you did this (along
> with your apologizing in the second post) when you sit down at
> a table in a resturaunt do you request two plates?
> One for each face?
> This is bizzare, gay pirate hackers... You could make a movie out of
> this.
> Just to earn it's tag, this post will now mention the word fellatio.
> Thank you.
> Warhammer Quest. Definitely the wrong group - we only do homoerotica and
> Alladvantage spam here I'm afraid...
> And that was a menacing "F*ck with me and you're going to regret it" kind of
> heh, just in case you didn't notice...
> Finally, has anyone seen or heard anything from Tom Beliech or Jonas
> "Originator of the constantly changing sig on RGMW" Whitespore (AKA Crazy
> Eddie the Fourth) around lately? Tom was supposed to visit eventually
> (probably Gen Con 2000 at this point) and Jonas owes me $9.
> No offence taken, but i dont think it has anything to do with brain power
> anyway, just the length of the shaft.
> Apparently I'm being either fellated or stalked. Maybe both.
> With those qualifications, I could be President!
> Reality is a long, horrible, on-topic post. And everyone knows on-topic posts
> don't exist.
> We don't get many trolls here - well, we do, but call them regulars.
> Ahhh, this is much better. Personally, I have no idea WTF my IQ is or even
> what it means, so I think I'll brag about my dick too. I can also brag
> about my arse, so this thread definitely has some potential. Would anyone
> like to join the discussion?
> I don't mind [OT], but at least make it kinky.
> DISCLAIMER: The opinions expressed here are solely those of the author's who
> doesn't care whether or not you think he is a right wing nut. Please
> forgive any spelling and/or grammatical errors for he is also a victim of
> the American public education system.
> With the shirts I wear, embarrassment is foreign to me...
> If the yanks dont like me posting about another shooting incident then
> get them to stop shooting people!!
> You do have the full range of Demonically Evil add-ons, don't you?
> Including Office 97?
> They're quite lovable really, unless you happen to be black, Jewish, have
> more money than them, or just get in their way ...
> We're here for you man. RGMW, the support group for perverts.
> Hooray! A real damn argument now! You yanks can shove your guns up your
> arse, we're arguing about Dr Who!!
> I have no self-esteem, and need to use a large sig to bolster my failing ego.
> The British contingent of this NG will have something to say about
> life in the US when they finally manage to do something slightly more
> useful than carrying the US armed forces luggage to the next third
> world smackdown that we deliver.
> Of course, RGMW stands for Rogered Guys Moaning and Whining...
> I was going to extend this argument, but I went for a piss and
> forgot my next paragraph. Damn.
> Personal code of honour. I don't do the following:
> 1) Sleep with dead things, children, or animals.
> 2) Drink American "beer".
> 3) Post binaries.
> I think we need a "don't ask, don't tell" policy on this NG...
> I've got you figured out. You're only in this for the text.
> I believe the term you are looking for is " Official RGMW Chocolate-Covered
> Skank Ho"
> Ooo.. NO YOU WON'T DRAG ME INTO THIS SMUT!!!!!!!!!
>
> But... Could you do that again. This side, this time? And call me
> mommy...
> But sleeping with dead baby animals is what life is all about!
> Unless the exchange rate changes, and Canadian money becomes worth -more- than
> Monopoly money.
> All innocent and/or sensible persons have 12 hours to leave this NG. After
> that, we can no longer guarantee your sanity.
> Well, you've just met all the qualifications to be a professional author, in
> that you have no qualifications to be an author.
> I dunno, he quite enjoys people holding candles up to his perversion, but
> the smell of scorched hair is atrocious. :)
> It's not silly. You did spell glair wrong. Just because there's no such
> word as glair, doesn't mean you didn't spell it wrong...
> There actually exists a thread with more than a hundred posts and no
> homosexual innuendo. (A scientific viewpoint of the flood) The subject
> itself naturally has absolutely nothing to do with GW games, but that
> would be asking too much, don't you think.
> You're too young for this filth. Go and browse the hardcore porn groups
> instead, less chance of you being corrupted...
> All hail the wonky Hamster of Doom, Bucktoothed Harbinger of the Apocalypse!
> *Vomits* ROBCPW1/AlecPeters/Rec.games.miniatures.warhammer.kinky.sex
> .latex.bestiality.corpses.and.even.altar.boys
> That is *sooo* cheesy. Didn't I say Codex: God would be full of hyped-up
> super-cheese?
> Frankly, it looked more legible when I ROT13ed it.
> You bastard, leave those words in my mouth alone... They are already
> twisted enough...
> Actually, for me, fucking is just fine.
> All we need are quad combiweapons to solve all of our differences.
> Hey, you can't talk to him like that. As a successful lawyer,
> astronaut, cabalist, baker, organ donor, gun runner, priest, bookie,
> crimefighter, stand up comedian and pro wrestler I can safely say that
> if you continue to make slanderous allegations like that I'll be forced
> to fly to the US and rape your pets. Twice.
> Stop being so goddam polite. I'm trying to start a flame war here.
> You mis-spelled "M45T3R H4X0R."
> (PS -- how long does the typical thread's title remain valid for,
> anyway? I want to see some statistics.)
> Jeepers. Maybe somebody should start a newsgroup devoted to GW
> miniatures games.
> I think we need to start a support group....."Hi, my name is Matt and I
> used....AOL."
> Oh, come on! You've been here before! You know we don't actually
> DISCUSS anything around here. We just trade insults, semi-coherent
> rants, off-topic opinions, and snappy .sig lines.
> Well, your 'emotional pain' is bleeding all over my carpet.
> I'd see a porno flick with Kylie Minogue!!
> (Either Kylie in the movie, or Kylie out
> sitting on the bed with me. Either interpretation
> works just fine as far as I'm concerned...)
> I'm glad I stopped by this newsgroup, I've learned so much about
> Warhammer.
> Mature? Don't you ever accuse us of being that again...
> "I know what the rule says, Tuomas, but you *know* what I meant. If I
> have to change it I'll have to walk *ALL* the way back up to the
> computer doohickey..."
> Whoa...we're on topic. What happened?
> It's finally happened. My Warhammer hobby has left me homeless and
> penniless. My car was repossessed this morning.
> I suggest contacting the RTC - but be careful,
> they're a funny lot and much given to impaling unbelievers with sharp
> pointy things and removing people's heads for the slightest
> transgression. Some of them like eating people, too.
> I knew that guy at the GW store was looking at me strangely while I was
> feeding cheese to the Skaven . . .
> Hah! Look out for my lethal commando Nurgling, then.
> A Texan AND a Frenchman? Wouldn't that cause some kind of arrogance
> singularity, sucking the ego out of everything around it, and causing a
> massive personality black hole which made all other topics of conversation
> except it's own bloated superego impossible?
> Well, if you have Squats, I'm sorry to tell you that these are almost
> completely worthless. It seems you can't unload these even if you try
> to give 'em away free with other figures. I will do you a HUGE favor,
> if you have any, and buy any that you have at $0.50 a pound.
> Oh, come now...this NG was never serious. How seriously can you take a
> forum that's dedicated to playing outrageously-expensive games with
> little plastic and metal soldiers? You can't. Part of the problem here
> is that people are taking this way too seriously.
> No no no NO. You don't apologise and say something sensible, you're
> supposed to now flame everyone and take an outrageous stance on a highly
> debated topic.
> Hey, I'm not you.
>
> Oh, wait a sec, yes I am.
> Well... I chose the Eldar. They are so very color coordinated, and
> they have such pretty outfits. And there is the beret of course, and
> ritual sodomy. Mmmmmmhhhhh.... ritual sodomy.
> This is weird. I had an image of two Marines trying to kick out a
> gatecrashing Greater Daemon...
> First of all, DIE DIE FUCKING DIE!
> Second of all, see the first.
> Understands that a game can be named differently between
> countries. Marvels at the fact that the UK guys are actually rallying
> around this.
> When making Shepherd's Pie, try to avoid using real shepherds.
> SSSHHHHHH!! I'm busy trying to pick up hot internet chicks, do you mind?
> A French wargame? That's a novel concept. What do you do, see who can drop
> their weapons the fastest, run for cover and surrender??
> Now that I got the Steering Wheel patch, my car hardly ever
> crashes. Waddaya mean it was supposed to COME with one...?
> Anal cigarettes? Yeeeow.
> So, in a way, it is worth the money (I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M SAYING THIS).
> I find that bulldog clips are indispensable. Being immune to Tippex,
> they can start shredding paper / pinning writing implements from the
> first turn. Of course, they have to watch out for that bloody blu-tack,
> though.
> A "Version-change" (similar to a sex change but more painful)
> If this childish patriotic/religious/intolerant nonsense doesn't stop
> right now, NOBODY's going to heaven. Catch my drift? Good.
> Certainly, sir. Today's speciality is liquified redneck with diced Alec
> Peters. We also have ROB marinaded in its own bullshit, and raw
> Thrasher delicately sprinkled with Al-Hussein(TM) anthrax spores. Might
> I recommend the Evil Homer(TM) Shredded Newbie for dessert. All served
> with a side-salad of chopped Comizzar and Phoenixflare.
> Codex: Leman Russ Right Sponson Heavy Bolter Ammo Hopper Third Shell
> Down From the Top, painted Green and Named Richard by the Tank
> Commander.
> It almost appears as if this festering pit of filth has degenerated into
> a semi-respectable on-topic newsgroup. Say it isn't so.
> HA! I just killfiled god!
> Pompous know it all: Someone who doesn't think 100 is a high number for
> an IQ.
> You're thinking of the soon-to-be-released battlefield sewing kit surely
> (RRP £15). Including quick release zip pockets allowing GW quick access
> to your wallet and a free bottle of Citadel Colour T-shirt dye (contains
> only enough to dye 75% of your shirt, so you must buy another (RRP £10).
> Transfers will also be sold separately (£5 each), and then there's the
> official GW needle set (boxed set of 5 sewing needles £25) - only shirts
> which have been modified using official GW needles and accessories will
> be allowed into official GW stores/events.
> Better than being anally raped by a moose and living.
> 3. I've also heard that Jews are trying to take over the world. I'm
> busted on this one. I'm working independantly on the problem, however,
> and none of my family members (to the best of my knowledge) are
> attempting world domination.
> ObDisclaimer: I hear Tom Clancy interviews sailors before he writes a
> book. Said sailors must be having a great laugh at his expense right
> now.
> Bobbies. How can anyone be afraid of anything named "Bobbies"?
> A great deal of people on this NG are stupid kids who think they have
> the world figured out. The rest are stupid adults who think they have
> the world figured out . . .
> Before start I'd like to say that the word "Sex" was included in the title
> merely to get more people to read this.
> ROBCPW1 is a fucking you.
>
> Oops, disregard that stylish pun. I've just realised that it sounds like an
> Italianised warning of an attack upon the readers person...
> Gotta love it when someone with a .fi at the end of their address has
> better English skills than someone with a .uk at the end of theirs...
> At last!! Someone else who uses the term "darkies"!!! I thought it was
> dead long ago. *wipes tear from eye* ah, that reminds me of my childhood -
> my grandfather ranting on about niggers and spics and krauts, and the rest
> of my family saying, "Yes, well, erm, quite. Did you see that programme on
> BBC 2?"
> Actually, Roboute was writing the Codex, and he needed to make sure it
> was up to scratch. So, for the entire Heresy, he had the whole *legion*
> parading up and down on Ultramar, repainting their armour, parading,
> designing laurel wreaths, parading, building statues to the Emperor,
> parading - oh, and partaking of the traditional Ultramarine ritual of
> group sodomy. Repeatedly. In companies. On the parade ground. In
> formation.
> You can't make an omelette without breaking Jervis^Weggs.
> No. I have something special planned for McVey; a death connected to
> his sin... we'll feed him ever Lemartes miniature in the place.
> Damn straight!
> Let's capture all the studio. Tie them to chairs.
> "Now, Mr. McVey. Ve have a few questions to ask you..."
> "Ah. Mr. Priestly. So nice of you to join us?"
> "Do you expect me to talk?"
> "No, Mr. Woods. I expect you to die...."
> Is he trying to say that Faith In Christ will get people laid in the
> afterlife? That's a new take on it.
> GO: No, no, really, they're, um, well, they're... Rizla papers, that's
> what they are! Oh yes.
> FI: Oh yes?
> GO: (Begins frantically rolling top secrets documents) Oh yes. Got a
> light?
> Damn you Bourbon! Damn you straight to hell!
> Well, not *straight* to hell... (gulp)
> Here is a universal Chaos Motto:
>
> Trying to overthrow the Imperium for 10,000 years, and still haven't
> gotten it right.
> Suddenly, there was a great lurch in the space time continuum, as
> every member of RGMW lost their lunch.
> Actually, it's been proven that 80% of RGMW are complicated AI programs.
> 19% are overweight, balding white men who never leave their homes.
> The remaining 1% are clueless newbies and/or trolls.
> BTW, this is the true reason for the Horus Heresy: the Loyalist were
> into opera and ballet, and the heretics were into musicals.
> Perhaps he knows a HUGE Harley-Biker kinda guy covered in tattoos,
> several randomly-placed body-piercings, shaved head and red goatee!
> Wearing leather, wrapped in chains, and smoking a ceegar!
> "Where's that bitch Alec Peters? Joe Schulte's the name, sodomizing's
> the game!"
> I think it should go to
> rec.bloody.scientists.showing.off.their.'A'.grade.at.physics.A.level, to
> be honest ...
> Okay, kiddies, I'm starting to feel sorry for the pathetic, child
> molesting, UET afflicted dork. We've got to leave him *one* of his
> illusions.
> However, we will stop sending orders to people who insist on "group
> hugs" as part of a (quickly decided) company policy.
> You missed a FUCKING between THIS & NEWSGROUP.
> Still, I think the IG could use a combat engineer corps. They should be tough
> enough to hold their own in battle, technically competent and well-supplied
> with novel equipment, matter-of-fact about the risks of combat, hairy faced,
> four feet tall and called Squats.
> 'Mancunian'. That's just plain EVIL.
> He was an intelligent AOL'er! THEY'RE A PROTECTED SPECIES, DAMMIT!
[Unfortunate but necessary legal stuff :
These out-takes where compiled by Shim. The actual content is probably
copyright whoever typed it. You probably can't redistribute this
stuff without Shim's _and_ the people who wrote its permission] (
geocities.com/area51/crater/8435/rgmw) (
geocities.com/area51/crater/8435) (
geocities.com/area51/crater) (
geocities.com/area51)