mINon's NIghTOUT!

The scene opens to a nightscape of chaos. Surrounding a friendly suburban neighborhood Denny's in nearby Fairfax, VA. A series of generic tents have been set up encompassing the restaurant without any sense of order. Tents are set up on grass, sidewalks, even in the middle of the street. Several fires have been lit within trashcans providing the resting Minion army warmth. As the volume of this televised spot increases your ears are assailed by a crescendo of electric guitar while the camera pans about to see a different set of Minions that has taken control of the modified ice cream truck playing a song off of the new Megadeth CD 'The System has Failed' but only the most discriminating ear could determine the song before it is quickly replaced by the screeching sound and sight of a knife scraping against a plain Denny's plate as the scene switches to a view of a knife fiercely going through a slice of syrup drenched French Toast.

Minion 1, "MMmmm... MMMMMmmmmm!"

The sounds of a single knife sheeting against a syrup glazed plate is then joined with the sounds of more knifes and forks scraping against several other plates as the camera pans backwards revealing three very familiar Minions sitting at a booth within Denny's. They are currently in the process of enjoying the last few morsels of French toast on their syrup laden plates which are no doubt three orders of French Toast Clubs. As one Minion takes a piece of the toast into his mouth he twitches as the aroma and taste fulfills his senses the mere morsel of food bringing an intense wave of euphoria.

Minion 1, "My God!"

Minion 2, "Is this legal?"

Minion 1, "I don't know man, but if two slices of delectable denny's French toast with luscious strips of bacon and eggs are in any way a crime then... THROW ME IN JAIL!"

During this mindless rapport between two slaves a third remains silent. He grips his fork with such ferocity that his knuckles show through the skin and his fist shakes revealing the continuously building anger threatening to spill forth from him into this peaceful family friendly eatery.

Minion 3, "Yeah� well... FORGET YOU GUYS! TRAITORS! We ALWAYS order the French Toast Club! ALWAYS! but no... you guys just had to get that limited time only 4.99 special French Toast SLAM! I mean it's not even a club for Placebo's sake!"

Minion 2, "Dude, chill out man. We can't be the same FTC lovin' Minions forever. It's time to move on to bigger and better things..."

Minion 3, "You move on. I know where my loyalties lie."

The first Minion who was previously seen playing guitar and luring several Minions from their daily lives throughout the Washington metropolitan area through the power of song rises from his seated position slamming his fist down onto the table. The empty plates and dirty silverware rattle on the cheap manufactured table and a laminated promotional display for the "Ultimate Omelet" collapses on the table face down no longer taunting your stomach with its seductively edible wiles.

Minion One dons on a military style hat as he lays down a map written in 3 colors of crayon provided to him by a Denny�s waitress earlier. On the map is a picture of a ring with a stick figure labeled "Ratliff" on it. There are several arrows pointing at the stick figure from multiple vectors however you notice the colors produced by the free Denny's unbranded crayons are not as bright as those created by Crayola brand crayons but still manages to get the job done albeit appearing to be somewhat bland.

Minion 1, "Two is RIGHT!"

Minion 1, "It's time we show the UWA and the world that the Minions do not stand still and that step shall begin now, but it shall not end with our dining selections of choice tonight here within this fine establishment, nay it shall not. Saturday begins a new order, the Minion Order! While Doc Placebo takes time to mourn the loss of one of our own that fell by his hand during the Hardcore Title Match with Rilo we have been meted out the task of continuing the OMEGA SIN's desires. To end it ALL! And end it all we shall."

Minion 2, "But we're up against Stuart Ratliff, does he even know where Hong Kong is?"

Minion 3, "Like Oh... My... GOD! He couldn't even figure out Chameleon was disguised as Doc! My bet is he'll prolly show up in the Georgia Dome."

Minion 2, "MCI CENTER!"

Minion 3, "GEORGIA DOME!"

Minion 2, "MCI CENTER!"

Minion 3, "GEORGIA*"

Minion 1, "ENOUGH!"

Minion 1, "From this map I have deduced our strategy. Ratliff may have size and strength on our side but that is all he has. For we three, we few, we band of Minions."

Minion 2, "Did you just rip off Shakespear?"

Minion 1, "SHH! Geeze... now where was I? Oh yes... we band of Minions... have been chosen by the Doctor to represent him in this time of his grief! We have been sent forth to set this newcomer in his place. After Saturday neither the Incident nor the Koven will need to put up with anymore of Ratliff's antics until he proves himself in Placebo's eyes and from this map here I have developed our strategy! Now. listen to this!"

As Minion One begins to delve into the depths of his devilish plans for this next production of UWA Stranglehold he makes a constant effort to refer to various points on his crayon drawn map while also maintaining eye contact with his target audience (Minions 2 & 3). While this briefing begins the camera begins to pull away from the plotting underlings and towards one of the windows looking outward at the Minion War Camp and the thousands of slaves just waiting to enact their master's orders to remove one pest from the United Wrestling Alliance.

pRomO doNe NOW!