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I never really thought about what my life would have been
like if I had never met Jane. What if I had found some where
else to sit in the cafeteria that day? What if I sat with Emily?
That would have been interesting. The sweetness and perfection
that Jane had a seething obsession with. Yeah, it would have
been interesting if I would have chose to sit with with Emily of
all people that day; it's pretty ironic that, through all this,
I can honestly say I never really got to know the girl.
I often wonder how things would have been different. Would
Jane have done to me the things we did to Emily? I don't know.
I said we did these things, we did them, but I think Jane did
much more than I did. I won't deny that I did it, I did, I'm
just not sure I did it willfully. "That girl is pure evil," she
once told me, "and look at the way everyone flocks to be near
her, but they're all afraid to get too close. It's like she has
she has some kind of halo around her body that we dare not step
through or else. It's an undying force drawing them near and
and another holding them back. They're prisoner's suspended
around her; they're flies buzzing her ears. It's a sad, sad
thing, Laurie."
I wanted to question her judgment. Was it really such a sad
thing to be loved by everyone? Maybe it was. Maybe if more
people hated Emily than she would have been able to prepare
herself for hardships. Then, possibly, what we did to her
wouldn't have been so terrible after all. The truth of the
matter is, bad things happen to everyone. Something bad was sure
to happen to Emily somewhere down her smooth road of life, but
Jane wouldn't believe it. She felt like she had to make
something happen to Emily.
When I met Jane in the cafeteria, it was my first lunch hour
at a new school. She sat alone, and I couldn't understand why
when I looked at her. On the outside, Jane looks like a typical
average girl. She's pretty, but she's not gorgeous. Her
clothes are nice but not expensive or trendy. On the contrary,
she didn't look like a geek. Her honey-colored hair reached past
her shoulders, and her big, brown deer eyes made her appear kind
and benignant. I looked at this seemingly harmless creature and
decided she needed a friend as much as I did. I guess I know why
I sat with Jane after all; she looked lonely. She smiled when I
sat down, and we introduced each other. We spoke typical small
talk: what classes we had, how our teacher were, what boys were
cute, how gross the food was we were eating, and such. I
remember Emily passing us by with her lunch tray in hand; she
glided over to a table of giggling girls. Jane's round brown
eyes had narrowed into malicious slits. She turned to me and
asked a peculiar question. It was something I never thought
about before. "Do you find life absurd?"
"Sometimes, I suppose." I answered
"Do you ever wonder about the parts of life that other
people find absurd? I think it's funny that many of us just get
up, go to work, go home, and go to sleep. And for what? We die!
That's what's really absurd. And all those concerned with
being popular...why? When we graduate, we'll never see these
people again. That's absurd. But, people find things like the
supernatural and paranormal absurd, and that's something I can't
understand. Those kinds of things make a little sense, and they
are things that no one can hide themselves from. That is, if you
really think about it. I think it's a part of my mind that is
just fascinated with these things; I can't help it. I'm drawn to
it. Have you ever drove by an accident and secretly wish that
you could see some gore? That's the kind of fascination I'm
talking about."
I thought what she was saying was a little crazy at
first, but the more I listened, the more I began to understand.
She was making sense. I told her I never really thought about
those things before, but I was finding myself agreeing with her.
She smiled a sly smile, and asked me if I felt like doing
something after school. What did I have going that day besides
possibly walking the dog? So I agreed.
I waited for her in the main door lobby after the bell to
leave. After a moment, I saw her face coming towards me
surrounded with a sea of the other faces belonging to people
leaving school. Her expression was blank, and her gaze was fixed
on me. I never saw her look like that before; it was so cold.
I shuddered just before she reached where I was standing. "I
want to go for a walk, Laurie." she said. Her voice was almost
commanding in its tone.
"Sure, okay." I replied. I felt like I didn't have a choice
for some reason. I already felt like I could never say no to
Jane. I couldn't say no to that face. I couldn't say no to that
voice. Jane already had a hold on me that I couldn't escape; she
had me from the very beginning. She turned around and tapped my
hand to guide me in the direction of the back of the building,
and started to walk with large strides. I followed drudgingly
behind her.
When I found myself following her across the lawn behind the
school, I had to ask where she was taking me. "You'll see," she
told me, "trust me, you'll like it. If you don't, I promise I'll
never make you do it again." I trusted her. I followed her to
the edge of the school's property, and she took me into the
woods. I wasn't dressed for a hike, and the heels on my boots
made me trip over the roots and rocks. Jane was a few yards
ahead of me after a while, and I had a rough time keeping up.
She finally stopped at what looked like a wall of small
trees and tall grass. I was still far behind her when she turned
and called back to me "In here!" and disappeared into the wall.
"Wait!" I called, and broke into a jog. I tripped and
almost fell into a pile of stickers before I finally reached the
passageway. I pulled the tall grass back and pawed my way
through. There she was, sitting in the middle of a small
clearing. Jane was starting a fire. A log lay within a few feet
of where her fire began to burn, and she sat on it to watch.
She looked up at me, smiled that sly smile again, and patted a
place next to her. I nodded, and did as I was motioned to.
"What is this place, Jane?" I inquired.
"It's my secret place. I come here to think sometimes. I
used to just come and sit, anyway. When I came up with that
whole thing about absurdity, life, and the supernatural, I
learned to do things like this." She knelt in front of the fire
and rubbed her hands together. When she uncupped her hands, a
butterfly fluttered out of her fingers.
"How? What did you just do?" I was amazed. I never saw
anything like that before.
"I started playing with witchcraft, Laurie. I never really
believed in it before, but I just decided to try it one day. I
don't worship the earth or anything weird like that, so I 'm not
really a witch. I just do this because it's fun. Want to learn
how?"
Everyone has a little voice inside their heads, and mine was
telling me to run home and never talk to Jane again. However,
there was another part of me that wanted to learn how to do
magic. I stayed with Jane, and she showed me how to make
butterflies among other little tricks. She even told me that if
I came the next day, she'd bring her magic book and we'd learn
more stuff together. I was having so much fun, so I agreed to
meet her the next day. Soon, I found myself meeting Jane after
school every day, and we would go in the woods to practice our
witchcraft. We dubbed it "the witching game," and it was our
little secret.
My family started wondering where I was going every day.
Since I moved here from Springfield, they were concerned as to
whether or not I'd adjust. We used to be such a closely knit
family, and I was growing apart from them. Worst of all, my
grades were suffering from going to see Jane afternoon. When we
first got here, I expressed interest in getting an after school
job so I could keep my car, but I soon forgot about that. All I
wanted to do was play with magic. It was my escape from all that
was real. What I was doing in the woods every day was real, but
it was hard to remember that when I was doing it. Maybe if I
would have realized that it wasn't all just a bunch of tricks, I
wouldn't have went along with Jane's plan against Emily.
It was the day of the homecoming football game. Jane and I
ate together as usual, but I noticed that she kept eyeing Emily.
Emily was sitting across the room in her cheerleading uniform
looking like a glittery ball of light. The girls she was with
were laughing like everything coming out of Emily's mouth were
the greatest things they ever heard, and Jane's face was growing
darker and darker. "Wouldn't it be nice if she had any idea
what it's like to be someone like me? What would :Little Miss
Cheerleader do if she had to come home every night to screaming
parents and frozen dinners for supper? I think she'd crack. I
think she'd simply burst like bubble gum if she couldn't cheer
or she wasn't the best. Wouldn't it be great to see something
bad happen to her for once? Just once. Just one time I'd like
to see a hair out of place on that silky blonde head. Just once
I'd like to see her get a zit. A big zit. I want to see a fat
red dot on her pointy little nose! I'd like to see her make a
fool out of herself. Wouldn't it be funny if she just fell out
of her chair right now? Wait a minute..." she lifted her hand as
if to cast a spell.
"Jane, don't!" I snapped and grabbed her wrist. Emily's
chair teetered, and she grabbed the edge of the table. Her
friends had stopped talking, and they looked at her puzzled.
Emily raised an eyebrow and shrugged, and they all started
talking again. They talked like normal, and Jane gave me a
disapproving look.
"Never mind, I have a better idea. I'll tell you when we go
witching after school." The bell for class rang, and that was
the last I saw of Jane until school ended. I was scared. I
never wanted to do anything to make Jane mad, and I know I
angered her at lunch that day. When I saw her later, though, it
seemed that she had forgotten all about it.
When we arrived at the clearing, Jane took out her black
shoulder bag. In it was the magic book, and a few colored pieces
of thick cellophane. I looked at the cellophane and it dawned on
me what they were. They were red, gray, and white. The school
colors.
"Those are from Emily's pom pons! What are you going to do
to her?"
"I ripped these off from her during Geometry. I think Ms.
Perfect needs a little surprise during her special game tonight."
I don't know how Jane knew it. I think she may have sneaked a
peek at the homecoming program in the student counsel room. Jane
knew that at precisely 7:15 p.m., the players were going to run
through the cheerleader's spirit line. Jane knew that the
cheerleader's like to stunt as the player's run by. Jane knew
that Emily is tiny, and she is one of the girls they toss in the
air. Jane knew. Jane knew it all.
We played around with our usual stuff, and Jane eagerly
would stop to look at her watch. Suddenly, she stood up and got
her materials. "I need your help for this one," she said, "
I need you to hand me the pom pon strings when I'm ready for
them." My hair stood up, and I started hearing that little voice
again. I shook it off one last time.
Jane held out her hands, and she began chanting around the
fire. Her chanting got louder, and soon, she just repeated the
same word over and over again. "Freeze. Freeze. Freeze,
freeze, freeze..." she moaned. Her eyes grew rounder than I had
ever seen them before, and they started to water after a while
from lack of blinking. Her trance-like disposition told me that
only one thing could be happening; she was watching the opening
ceremonies of the game from inside her head. She read how to
become clairvoyant. "NOW!" She turned to me, and I mechanically
placed the strings into her clammy palms. She tore them away
from me and immediately ripped the strings in half and let the
pieces float into the fire. "FREEZE!" she bellowed.
After a moment of silence, she smiled quickly and let her
face fall into that cold stare. "I think I did it." she
whispered.
"What did you do?" I could barely speak.
"I finally got Emily Rae. I finally got her!" I never saw
Jane look so happy, yet so evil, as she did that evening. I went
home and laid awake for a long time. My family wondered why I
didn't come home for dinner that evening, and they had every
right to worry about me. I told them that I was going to start
coming home after school, and I told them they could stop
worrying about me. I was going to look for a job, and I was
going to spend more time studying so I could get my grades back
up. I just wanted to get away from Jane. I just didn't know how
to tell her.
When I came back to school the next day, I heard the
terrible news. Emily Rae was in the hospital with cracked ribs.
Apparently, the cheerleaders that through her in a basket toss
couldn't catch her. They all claim that they couldn't more their
arms or legs after they through her into the air. They froze.
Froze. Emily crashed into the ground, and they all could hear
her body crunch. No one could do anything; it was terrible.
I still feel responsible; I helped her. So I did the only
thing I could do. I worked up the courage to say no to Jane. I
was scared, and I didn't want her to get the best of me any
more. I was going to threaten Jane. I knew a few tricks of my
own, and she wasn't about to hurt me or anyone else as long as I
knew how to use my powers. I never got the opportunity. Jane
never came back to school. I heard her name being paged to go to
the office a few times, but I never saw her around again.
I later made some new friends, and I swear I never cast
another spell. I just wish that I would have never sat with
Jane, and I wish that I didn't know what really happened to Emily
Rae.