Buffy sat on her bed, exhausted from being on guard at the graveyard. She was just about ready to drop her head on the pillow when she noticed a long stemmed rose and a note lying on her desk. She stood up and grabbed the note before sitting back down. The note said "I am watching you" and with it was a picture of Willow, Xander, and herself, lying on her bed watching TV *He's going to hurt them!* she thought. *My best friends are his next victims!* She felt ready to burst out crying. She was frightened that either Angel was going to kill her friends or drive her crazy, which ever came first.

There was not a day gone by that she hadn't thought about killing Angel. Every time the chance was hers, pure hatred would come over her followed by an ounce of love and she could neither love nor hate him.

Angel watched from the shadows as she came home. He was only a few yards away from her, so close he could smell her perfume. It intoxicated him. But she didn't even notice. As soon as Buffy was in her room, he jumped up on to her roof with the ease of a cat. He watched as she took off her coat, watched as she put away her weapons, and he watched as she found the rose. He savored the terrified look on her angelic face. She put it down slowly and walked into the bathroom. Angel chuckled and quickly leapt off of her roof and sprinted in the direction of the park to find a meal.

Drusilla was waiting for him as he entered the warehouse. "Angel, my dear boy. Where've you been? It gets so lonely around here by myself." Spike was pissed at that comment.

"What do you mean, Ducks? I'm here all bloody day!" He fumed.

Angel laughed. "Spike, Spike, Spike. When are you gonna learn that your company is always considered lonely. Right, Dru?" He flashed her an evil grin.

"Oh Spike, as long as you're in that chair...." She trailed off. "Angel, why didn't you bring me with you?" she asked, changing the subject.

Angel shook his head. Dru was fun, but insanity was so highly overrated sometimes. He hated having to explain himself to anyone. Darla had never really cared where he went, but she was so damned needy. Drusilla was the opposite. She tried to get things herself and acted like a drill sergeant pressing for questions on where you had been. Buffy had never done those things, that was one thing he had missed about her. He couldn't understand some of his feelings and emotions he had for her. He blamed them all on that idiot soul. He could still feel him deep inside of him. Coursing through his veins. Just underneath his skin. He mourned and cried and howled all the time when he killed or tortured someone. Angelus thought it amusing. The way the soul would scream endlessly if he ever got in sight of Buffy. He could talk to him, too. Angel would say something and Angelus would answer back in his mind. He thought he would be the next to go insane.

"I'm going to bed," Angel finally said, leaving Dru's question unanswered. He stalked away towards his room, in his mind, he was having a conversation with the soul.

*Shut up you bastard! I'm in control of this body now and if you don't keep quiet I will go out right now and rip out your little slayer's lungs!* Angelus was furious. Angel had been nagging at him all day and he couldn't sleep. The only way he was ever able to make him quiet was if he threatened him by killing Buffy. Angel seemed a little more cautious than before, but he didn't give up.

*If you hurt her I will never, ever stop talking to you. I will drive you insane by keeping you up every night and screaming in your head.* Angel said menacingly.

*Fine. Let's go as soon as the sun sets and kill all her little friends in more ways then you could imagine and bring them all to her, then, of course, we must tell her that you still exist deep inside of me and there is hope of getting you back, then we will watch until she cracks, and make her one of us.* Angelus had never really thought about making her like them, but now it seemed perfect. She could be his. No nagging and needing. Angel, however, did not agree.

Angelus wavered as the strongest growl he had ever heard came inside his mind. The blood in his veins boiled as Angel struggled to become free. They fought for minutes until each of them, it seemed had equal control. The soul slashed at the demon with more strength then anyone ever thought he had. The demon clawed back. They went on like this for minutes when one of them finally gained full control, and collapsed on the ground.

*Don't ever try that again, soul boy, or I will make your slayer a vampire. Actually, I'm going to anyways, but her friends might not feel liking crossing over into the realm of the undead.* Angelus had almost lost, and he hated the fact the Angel knew it. Angel settled down inside the demon and let him sleep.

"Giles!" Buffy said. "I found this on my desk last night. He was watching us. Look at this picture," she thrust the picture toward him. "Me, Willow, and Xander. He's going to do something to Willow or Xander!"

"C...come on," Giles said in a shaky voice. "Let's go to the library to discuss this." Just as they got there, Willow burst through the door, with tears streaming down her face.

"Buffy!" she cried. "He killed my cousin!" Willow was now sobbing uncontrollably. "He killed her!"

"Who, Willow? Who killed her?" Buffy asked, dreading the answer.

"Angel!" she replied.

"How do you know it was him?"

"Because she was driving down to my house, and bang, she was dead. Some guy called 911 and the only thing they found were 2 little holes on her neck. Before she had invited you and Angel in her car! Who else could it be?" she screamed frantically.

Buffy thought back to the time that her cousin had invited them in the car. It had been raining and Willow spotted them standing by the graveyard. *She's right. It had to be him,* she thought.

Angel returned to the warehouse the next night after killing Willow's cousin. He had savored every moment, every look of true terror on her face before he had finally sucked the life out of her. Then he had headed over to Willow's house as she received the call that her cousin was dead. Grief. Pure grief mixed with hatred had shone on her face. He loved it. Angel, however, did not. He had screamed and pleaded and threatened and finally sulked during the whole affair. Oh well, Angelus thought, what can he do about it now? Drusilla was still up, waiting for him, no doubt. His spirits dropped a little as he saw her. He didn't want any nagging or endless questions. Not tonight.

"Angel. You left again. Why don't you ever take me?" she whined. She slithered over to him and grabbed his arm in a very dramatic style. "You're not being a very good daddy."

He pulled out of her grip. "Look Babe. I'm not in the mood for your continuous ramblings. Go annoy someone else," he said coolly as he headed past her. "And don't even try that pathetic look of yours. It's not gonna work this time," he added. He walked down the hall towards his room leaving a rather pissed, insane female--which is not a good combination for a vampire.

Angel was depressed, to say the least. He was stuck in body that he no longer controlled and his Buffy was in great danger. Every time he saw her like he was now, with the demon in control, he strongly wished that she would have the strength to defeat him. He knew she did, but she couldn't bring herself to defeat him. There was nothing he could do but yell at the demon and wait to see what would become.

"No!! Please God, no!" Angel only laughed as the young girl tried to escape his vise- like grip.

"Hold still. This is only gonna hurt like Hell," he let out a satisfying growl as he sunk his fangs into her pale neck. Her helpless struggles ceased as the life was quickly drained from her body. Once finished, Angel dropped her to the ground and proceeded on his visit to the slayer. He didn't have to look long. She was in the graveyard, as usual, patrolling for vampires. Actually, at the moment she was fighting a few. He watched from the shadows as she fought with ease and the two blood-suckers were turned to dust.

"Hello, Lover," he called quietly to her. Stunned, she turned around. "Nice night?"

"Yeah. Shouldn't you be out mutilating someone?" she quipped.

"Well, if you insist," in the blink of an eye he had knocked her onto the ground. Dazed, she struggled to catch her breath. She delivered a sharp kick to his left kneecap. Inside his head, Angel was screaming as usual. Angelus was not about to let some sissy soul ruin everything. *All right, Angel* he said. *You wanna mess with me? Go ahead. I hope you'll be a little wiser next time after your girl joins the fang gang!!* Angelus managed to get Buffy on her back. He straddled her as his face changed to match his personality. He slowly lowered his mouth to her neck.

Angel had had it. No way was he going to let his love become a monster by this demon. With one furious scream inside Angelus' head, Angel once again fought to become free. This time he found the courage within to break free of this Hell and gain control.

They struggled only briefly before Angel took full control. He sat up and looked around, amazed that he had had the strength. He suddenly remembered why he was here. He looked down at Buffy and felt a cold fear rush through him. She wasn't alive. And she wasn't dead. It had taken longer than expected to regain control and in that time, Angelus had made her a vampire.

Buffy shot up. Everything looked different. Darker like fog had swept through. She also felt more powerful, and her face hurt. She touched it. It felt twisted, demonic... She screamed with horror. She was a vampire. She slays them, she wasn't supposed to be one. The only difference between her and any other vampire was she didn't feel evil. She still felt ready to fight off vampires. It was really weird. She looked up at Angel who was still on top of her.

"What have you done?!?" she screamed angrily. "I'm like you were! I have a soul!"

"That wasn't me," Angel said. "That was Angelus. I am Angel I have a soul, too. Remember? I finally broke through the demon that had all the power over me. And now you're like me... Oh God, I can't stand this. I'm ready to kill myself!" he yelled out loud. "I fought for you and still it happened. He got you. I should have fought harder!"

"Angel," Buffy finally said. "Thank you."

"Thank you for what?" he yelled back. "Killing the slayer?!?" he got up and ran into the night.

The tears came quickly as he ran in the direction of his apartment. He couldn't believe what he had done. His only love turned into a vampire by him. And what's worse, she still had a soul. She would be guilty. *No,* he thought. *What had she done to feel guilty about? Except maybe falling in love with me...*

He reached his apartment and ran inside, not even bothering to close the door behind him. He threw open the doors of his closet and retrieved a suitcase from the corner. He threw it on his bed and shoved some clothes and a few personal items along with some blood packets inside. When he was finished, he picked up the phone to call an old friend. The phone rang three times before it was answered.

"Hello?" came a sleepy reply.

"Whistler?" Angel asked. "I need to talk with you."

"Make it quick. Hey, aren't you evil?" he asked suspiciously.

Angel sighed as the tears kept falling. He couldn't stop them. "Not anymore. I regained control, but I don't know how long it will last. Whistler, I have to leave."

"Angel, you're supposed to help the slayer, you agreed..." Angel cut him off.

"She's a vampire." he managed weakly.

"What?!? How? Who? That wasn't supposed to happen..." Whistler was shocked.

"I know. I...I'm..." he couldn't finish as a sob escaped his lips.

"You what?" Whistler said, dreading the answer.

"I'm her sire. I made her," he replied.

"Oh, God. Angel.."

"It gets worse. She's good. She has a soul." he said.

"That's good. Now you two can be together," he said thoughtfully.

Angel growled. "How can you say that? I turned the only one I loved into a demon!"

"She's not a demon, like you just said, she's good," Whistler argued.

"But she's a vampire. It's no different." Angel replied.

"So where are you gonna go? Back to Manhattan to continue your miserable life as the stink guy? Don't you think she still needs you? And now more than ever. Angel, do you still love her?" Whistler asked.

Angel was silent for a few moments. "I'll never stop loving her. But I can't be near her, not after what I did. I'm going tonight. After this, none of you will hear from me again."

"Too bad. I'll have to find someone else to watch over her, and that's gonna be hard. You should try to find a good demon in such short notice."

"What are you talking about? Buffy can take care of herself," Angel said.

Whistler laughed. "Now that she's a vampire? Who's gonna teach her about controlling the urges? About finding food? About staying away from certain things? No, she's gonna have it hard. I doubt she'll last a year, being good and all that."

"Don't try and talk me out of it. My mind's set. I gotta go. Take care," Angel replied.

"Bye," Whistler said as he hung up the phone.

Angel thought a little about what he was doing. Whistler had been right. Buffy would have it tough. But he was convinced he would only make things worse. With that in mind, he gathered up a piece of paper and a pen and started writing his goodbye note:

Buffy-

I can't even begin to say how sorry and guilty I feel about making you a vampire. I should have been able to control him sooner. It's all my fault. I believe now that it would have been better if we'd never met. I wish I had never known you, so that I could never have hurt you. But I love you with all of my heart and soul. I have to leave forever. Don't look for me. It's better we stay apart. Be careful. I'm so sorry.

-Angel

This story continues, here.