Title: The Dice
Author: Georgia
Email: moonrock66@aol.com
Category: MSR
Rating: R
Spoilers: None really
Summary: Not a chance. Read on.
Disclaimer: Chris, you said that M&S will do something this season
that they've never done before. I'm just throwing out suggestions.
Author's Notes: Blame this one on a bachelorette party I went to.
-------------------------------------
I should stay out of Mulder's desk drawer.
I know that now. But it's a little too late.
All I needed was a paper clip. Just one stupid little paper clip. My
box was empty. Damn Mulder. I was pretty sure I didn't leave an
empty paper clip box in my drawer. He's too lazy to hunt through
all the junk in his own desk. So he steals my stuff all the time. I bet
he had a hundred paper clips right there in his own drawer.
Now normally, I don't like to go through Mulder's desk. No telling
what you might find. But I needed that paper clip. We were already
late turning in our report to Skinner. And you can't simply staple
the expense reports to it. Copies have to be made and everything.
This is the government after all. Anyway, like I said, I needed that
paper clip. So I went over to Mulder's desk to look.
Surprisingly, I found what I wanted pretty quickly. His drawer
really wasn't so bad. He must've cleaned it out one day when I
wasn't looking. There was the usual assortment of office supplies.
Pens, post its, rubber bands. And, the stuff that was pure Mulder. A
pack of sunflower seeds, a picture of Samantha, some magazine
that I'm sure isn't his. Nothing that really surprised me, except for
the neat manner in which it was arranged. I was about to close the
drawer when something odd caught my eye.
Sandwiched between a half-empty pack of gum and Mulder's
arsenal of pencils were two dice. I suppose this being Mulder's
desk, dice might not see all that strange. But these weren't regular
dice. First of all they were green like they might glow in the dark.
And instead of dots, they had words on them. Now I know I
shouldn't have done this. I should have taken my paper clip, shut
the drawer and turned in our report to Skinner. But I can't help it.
I'm naturally curious. I had to see what those dice said.
I glanced over to make sure the door was shut. Then carefully, not
to disturb anything else in the drawer, I picked up the dice. My eyes
nearly came out of my head when I saw what the first one said.
Kiss.
I flipped it. Lick. Oh Jesus. Touch. I should put these down. Suck.
Right now. Bite. As if I could. Blow. Oh God. I was almost afraid
to look at the other die.
Hell. Just as I suspected. Body parts. Lips. Ear. Toes. Neck. Face.
And roller's choice. Shit. What was Mulder doing with these?
I stood there just staring at the dice for a minute, not sure if I was
offended or turned on. Part of me thought Mulder was a pig for
having these at work. The other 90 percent of my brain was
painting a picture it shouldn't be. Me. Mulder. Those dice.
I should have walked away. Or at least done it when I was sure
Mulder wasn't around. But I'm not very creative even in my fantasy
life. I need a lot details. And one roll of those dice would give me a
month's worth of material. I had to know what to picture. I had to
know what my roll would be.
I tossed the dice onto Mulder's desk, too interested in the outcome
to hear the door open. It was a good roll. I could almost see how it
would happen, could practically feel it. Then he spoke.
"What did you roll, Scully?"
Shit. I grabbed the dice, trying to hid them in my hand.
Mulder moved into the room and shut the door behind him.
I feigned innocence.
"Hum?"
"I asked you what you rolled," he tried again, reaching for my hand.
I fought him, but he finally caught my wrist. I opened my hand in
defeat.
"What are they Mulder?"
".....dice," I heard him say in a whisper.
"What?"
He cleared his throat.
"Foreplay dice."
I heard him that time.
"Why do you have them at work?" I asked. Maybe I could turn this
around. Make him forget that he'd caught me.
Forget? Mulder? Not a chance.
"You never know where you'll get lucky, Scully."
He took a step closer. I gave him the eyebrow. But he didn't back
off. He just smiled at me in amusement, like he'd discovered a
secret about his best friend. Something he liked but had never
expected.
"It's no big deal Scully," he said moving in still closer. "Frohike
gave them to me as a joke. I had them in my coat pocket and just
tossed them in the drawer. I'd totally forgotten about them."
"Oh," was all I said. God my mouth was dry.
I thought he'd let me off the hook then. That our little innuendo
game would be over. But Mulder wasn't giving up. He took the
dice from my hands, his fingers gliding over my palm more than
necessary.
"So, did you like your roll?" he asked, his voice an octave lower
than I'd ever heard.
I nodded stupidly like I was in a daze. My head was already
humming from that one light touch. His next words dropped my
heart into my stomach.
"Show me."
Christ. I assumed the roller got done to. Was the receiver, not the
giver. That Mulder would...I never imagined me doing it to him.
Mulder saw the realization dawn on my face. He leaned in with a
whisper.
"Don't think I won't take my turn."
I'm sure I blushed then. I know I looked away, trying to pull myself
from under Mulder's influence. But the urge was too strong. And,
he asked nicely.
"Please."
I still don't know why I did it. Except that I really, really wanted to.
I heard rather than felt myself say the words.
"Lean down Mulder."
The predatory look he'd had in his eyes since he came in the door
turned into a look of pure lust. And not just plain lust. This was
hopeful lust. Expectant lust.
He leaned down toward me, pushing deeper into my space than
usual. I wasn't prepared for the quick heat that built in the air
between us. It was so nice I almost didn't want to move. Mulder
shifted trying to look me, but his head was even with the side of my
face. He couldn't see me without backing up. After another few
seconds, I guess he took my hesitation as a dismissal because he
started to take a step backward. And I caught him off guard. I
raised up on my toes and laid one simple kiss over the pulse point in
his neck.
The race of his heartbeat echoed through my body before my lips
left his neck. He sucked in a quick lungful of air, followed by
several deep breaths that I'd swear if it weren't impossible for me to
have such an effect on Mulder, were a struggle for control. Finally
he moved back and stared at me with this challenging glimmer in his
eyes. And I knew I was in trouble.
Mulder reached for the dice, and I closed my eyes to wait. I
couldn't look. The dice sounded across the desk. Then nothing but
breathing. Mine and his, both fast and shallow. I could feel him
close above me and I knew that he was smiling. I was about to
open my eyes when his breath hit my ear. Followed immediately by
his tongue.
And I realized, that I had done a bad thing. I should never have
looked in his drawer. I should never have rolled those dice. I should
have known that I'd be powerless to stop this. That at the point
Mulder's tongue began working it's way up the outside of my ear, I
wouldn't be able to put together a coherent thought.
Instead, I sighed softly as his tongue followed the curve up to dip
inside my ear. His tongue swirled around and around, rolling up so
that he could blow into my ear with every touch. It's then that the
shaking began. I felt my head fall to the opposite shoulder, giving
him total access as his tongue left my ear to run down over the
lobe. He flicked it back and forth earring and all. I couldn't stop a
little moan from escaping my lips.
Then, just when I thought the torture was over, his tongue settled
on a spot behind my ear. Technically, he wasn't playing fair. I'd call
that my neck not my ear. But I didn't say anything because soon his
tongue started to move again, hugging the back side of my ear. By
the time he wrapped back around to the front of my ear, I was
shaking so violently that even Mulder's ego had to get a boost. He
finished with a quick sweep back into my ear that drove my shaking
right into the nerve.
I felt him pull away. And after a moment I opened my eyes to look
at him. He was waiting patiently, giving me the chance to decide. I
knew that one of two things would happen then. We'd quit. Game
over. We were even. Or, I'd pick up the dice for another roll.
The internal battle wasn't as strong as it should've been. This was
Mulder's game to lose whether he knew it or not. I never left his
eyes as I reached for the dice. They skidded across the desk and I
could tell from his face that it was a good roll. He went completely
pale. God. It had to be really good.
I glanced over to see what had captured Mulder's attention so. I
almost laughed when I saw it. No wonder Mulder was pale. He was
scared out of his mind. Afraid he was about to scream my name
really loudly in FBI's basement. If his reaction to that little kiss was
any predictor, he was probably right. The dice had landed on
Suck....and Roller's Choice.
Maybe later Mulder, I thought. That's not going to happen here.
But I decided to let him think about it for a minute. Conjure up a
mental picture. Somehow, I don't think Mulder needed as much
detail to fuel his fantasies as I did. Because he seemed to have it
pretty quickly. Then again I suspect it may have crossed his mind
before. He opened his mouth like he was about to suggest we call
the game. I shook him off with a determined smile and reached for
him. I knew where Mulder thought I was going. But he didn't seem
at all displeased when I came up with his hand.
I placed just the tip of his index finger between my lips watching as
Mulder's eyes almost rolled back in his head. No. I don't think he
was at all disappointed. Then as slowly as I could, I pulled his
whole finger into my mouth, warming it inch by inch with my
tongue and I went. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe this was my battle
to win. He might be screaming my name anyway. I settled my teeth
just above his last knuckle and gave him a popsicle strength suck.
Mulder's free hand skittered up to my neck, holding onto my head
like my lips were wrapped around another part of his body. And
just when I thought I'd given him more than he could stand, Mulder
decided to fight back. Did those dice come with rules?
No one had ever done this to me before. Not that I'd sucked on too
many fingers. But somehow, Mulder managed to bend his finger
inside my mouth and locate a highly sensitive spot on the side of my
tongue. Oh God. My mouth opened in a hurry.
He didn't even wait for me to recover. He grabbed the dice, brought
them to his lips for a kiss of luck (as if there were any bad rolls in
this game) and launched them back across the desk. Both of our
eyes followed the dice this time. I don't know how, but I think we
both knew what was coming. The first one landed on Kiss. My
heart started to beat even faster. Finally the second die bounced to
a stop. Lips.
And with that, six years of fighting to keep this platonic came to an
end because of something as arbitrary, as random as a dice roll. I
always knew life was a crap shoot.
Mulder regarded me seriously then, like he wasn't sure the step was
okay. I tilted my head back, trying to assure him that it was. But he
was still tentative. He moved toward me slowly, telling me with his
eyes how serious he was about this. That he was no longer playing
a game. I answered back that I wanted this. That I had always
wanted this.
I guess I convinced him because he stepped forward in a rush, like
he might lose his nerve, and placed one lingering kiss across my
lips. We both almost sighed at the relief of it, the feel of it. His
touch was firm but unassuming. Sweet but resolved. It was a
reintroduction, an opening note. Mulder pulled back for a moment
so that our lips were barely brushing. Then, the symphony began.
His mouth slammed down on mine, his lips seeming a thousand
times hotter than just a second before. They grasped at mine like
this might be his only chance. Like I might disappear before his
eyes. Or slap him. Or get stung. Or any of the hundred ways that
his fantasy usually ended.
And I...I could barely react. He'd finally removed the last shreds of
logic from my brain. My neurons were firing randomly, the wires
crossing, until there was nothing left of thought, only pure
sensation. His mouth devoured me, his lips challenging mine just
like one of his theories. I did the only thing I could. I opened my
mouth.
The slide of his tongue against mine completed a circuit, the sizzle
running down my entire body then back up into his. Mulder jumped
at the jolt like he's been awakened mid-dream. He jerked away from
me, momentarily stunned as if he didn't know which way to move.
Finally he fumbled for the dice, placing them in my hand.
"Your turn," he managed.
At first, I didn't understand.
"Mulder, I thought the game was over."
"You'll know when it's over Scully," he almost recovered.
But I saw it. In his eyes. That kiss shook him more than he
expected it to. He was trying to slow this down. To get a little
control back. Be careful what you wish for I laughed to myself. The
dice might not cooperate. They bounced across the desk. And we
both got something we wanted. Mulder got a temporary reprieve.
And I got an opportunity that I'd been waiting six years for. Touch.
Face.
I didn't know where to start. Mulder's had more chances to touch
me, when I was sick or scared or leaving him, than I have in return.
I studied that face I know so well for a few seconds, my eyes
lingering on his nose. And it occurred to me that he might not know
I found it beautiful. That without it, he'd be just another good
looking guy. That his nose gave him character, made him take
himself less seriously. I had to start with the nose.
My shaky hand hovered over the bridge as I slowly traced two
fingers along the side of it, his breath floating against my palm. My
hand fell to stroke the stubble of his cheek, sliding across his chin
and back up the other side of his face. All the while Mulder's eyes
never left my face. I fanned loose fingers across his forehead,
tickling a little as I went, letting my fingers drop to brush his
eyebrow, and circle the tender skin at the corner of his eye.
Then my hand seemed to move of its own will sinking between his
eyebrows, back down the slope of his nose, to the little crease just
below. I know I learned the name for it in medical school, but right
then I really didn't care. My finger fit perfectly in that indention. I
let it rest there for a moment before I ran a smooth nail from the
base of his nose down between the points of his upper lip. I had
planned to do something sexy when I got to his lips, but once there,
my fingers laid still, spread out on the soft skin.
All the time, I'd felt him staring at me. And apparently what he'd
seen had turned him on more than anything else we had done. Me
looking at him. Because before I get another breath, the game was
over. I saw what he meant. Mulder's mouth was on mine and my
back was against the filing cabinet. I guess Mulder decided to stick
with his last roll.
It was more than I could stand. Mulder was pressed full body
against me, and I could feel the cool steel of the filing cabinet at my
back. The hot and cold sensation was sending chills though my
system on top of the shivers Mulder's leg between mine seemed to
be causing. I tried to move in his arms, to rub my breasts against his
chest, but he was holding me too tightly. My hand skirted down to
his ass, pulling him in closer, arching against him. At that, we both
cried out...and realized where we were.
Mulder and I were out of that office in record time. No computers
were shut down. The door wasn't locked. I did have the presence of
mind to grab the dice as Mulder hurried us out the door. I prayed
we wouldn't make a spectacle of ourselves before we got out of the
building.
It turns out we made it all the way to the elevator in my building
before Mulder couldn't keep his hands off of me. I, serious,
straightlaced Dana Scully, walked down the hall to my apartment
with my open blouse clutched around me, trying to keep my
loosened bra from falling off my shoulders. And I didn't even give
my neighbors a thought.
We slipped silently into the darkness of my apartment, Mulder's
eyes glazing over as I finally let my blouse float to the ground. I
fumbled for my zipper, letting my skirt drop at my feet so that I
stood nearly bare before him. Mulder made no effort to move,
looking at me like he was almost afraid. Like he didn't trust himself.
Like he'd never before been so close to losing all control. Then he
did. He lost control. With one small smile from my lips.
Each step he took toward me seemed ten times longer than the one
just before. I sunk back against the door, feeling his hands on me
before the actual touch. We came together quickly that first time,
an eruption of emotion and lust and need, Mulder supporting both
my weight and his as he thrust into me against the door.
I cried out quickly, almost embarrassingly so. But Mulder soon
followed, his legs giving out as we collapsed into a fiery heap. I
would have gladly stayed there on the floor under Mulder forever.
But as soon as he'd had a minute to recover, Mulder was
whispering a misplaced "I'm sorry" and carrying me into the
bedroom. We curled up facing each other and slept an exhausted
and untroubled sleep, real hands and caresses mingling with the
images in our dreams.
Sometime before dawn, I woke to find Mulder's eyes resting on my
face, leisurely and unflinching, like they'd been there for a while.
The second time was slow, sweet, making love at last. And well,
after that, we got a little playful. Let's just say those dice came in
handy.
I hear him in the shower now singing something that sounds like
Welcome to the Jungle. I roll over onto his pillow wanting to
wallow in his scent. It's then that I see them. The dice. Lying side
by side on his pillow.
I'm not really awake yet, still more emotional than I might be after a
cup of coffee. And what I see almost makes me cry. I don't know
when he had time to do this. God knows he never sleeps. But
sometime during the night, Mulder has put a little piece of masking
tape on every side of the dice. And he's written some words. The
first die says I Love on each side. The second one simply says You.
And I realize that I was wrong before. Life is not a crap shoot.
Some things are left to chance. Others are weighted like these dice.
Like me and Mulder. And no matter how you roll them, you always
end up with I Love You.
end.
------------------------------------
Thanks to Lisa for the beta...my first. And to Alanna for
endless encouragement.
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