From 0029982@gps.gp.k12.mi.us Fri Dec 06 14:02:39 1996
"Names 2: The Swimming Pool"
Summary: The agents continue to have problems with
the intercom system. Extreme humor and a gay
kiss involved.
Category: H, V
Kris "Beast" Abel~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"You were acting like it was the end of the world."
-U2
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~Mistress of Shadows~
~Keeper of the Hovel~
~The Verjik Sorceress~
~The Beast of Creation~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Member of: DDTeens, XF-Fanfic, Fictalk, The Unholy
Trinity, Lone Gunwomen - Frohi, Underground Games
Club, and the Domi legacy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'VE GOT A SIG AND I AIN'T AFRAID TO USE IT!
From 0029982@gps.gp.k12.mi.us Fri Dec 06 14:02:35 1996
Okay, I got some requests for this one.;) Hey, when you get more e-mails for
a story than any other demanding a sequel, you sort of *have* to answer with
the sequel. 'Specially when it's this fun to write...;)
Disclaimer: The X-Files are the sole property of CC, 1013, and FOX. May they
all suffer from lesions on their more sensitive regions for daring to stifle
the X-File websites. Oh, and let them eat gruel, not cake.
Summary: Mulder, Scully, and Skinner once again suffer from the seemingly
unrepairable P.A. system in the FBI Building. Rated R for language and some
minor sexual associations.;)
Rating: H, MSR, & M (for Mechanical failure)
So, without further ado, this is for my ever ego-preening sex-crazed pal,
young Jim. Gotten any honey lately?;)
"Names 2: The Swimming Pool"
by Kris "Beast" Abel
0029982@gps.gp.k12.mi.us
One, two, three. Breathe. One, two, three. Breathe, Agent Mulder thought
to himself as he stroked the length of the Academy's training pool. Taking
deep breaths of air, he completed his 1000 meter freestyle in remarkably
good time. Ducking under water, he removed his goggles and viciously shook
his hair free of the swimming cap he wore. His partner, Dana Scully, had
pressured him into wearing it a few months ago after they had become
romantically involved. She said that the chlorine made his hair feel "dry and
icky" all the time. Not one to argue with his love, he had conceded to
wearing this ridiculous beanie-like Speedo cap - but only when there wasn't
anyone else in the pool with him. Wiping the water from his face, Mulder
practically leapt out of the pool as he gazed at the deep end of the pool;
an evil glint shining amongst the hazel. Picking up his towel, he headed for
the 15-foot diving board; overshadowed by the much larger 30-foot diving
platform. Leaping up the ladder, he tucked his towel into a rack and grinned
evily.
This was *his* moment. His time to be wild. His time to be...Tarzan!
"AAAAAAEAAAAAAAAHHHH!" Mulder yelled his Tarzan yell and ran off the
board; arching beautifully into the air before gravity hit and yanked him
(still screaming) into the deep end. Gasping, he surfaced and began to cackle
madly as he jumped out of the pool for another go...
@~@~@~@~@~@~@~
Elsewhere...
The head janitor at the FBI Academy had just got off the phone with his
partner, Fred, the head janitor at the FBI HQ, and was quite puzzled. It
seemed that they had once again lost their filtering power on their intercom
system. The funny thing was that the Academy had also lost their own filtering
power. Shaking, his head, he shut the whole apparatus and was testing each
intercom room by room. He had just finished up with the gym and was turning
on the pool room's intercom when the control board blew up in his face. As
he coughed amidst the black smoke coming from the board, he searched blindly
for the off switch. By accident, he hit the "live" switch - transferring the
pool's circuit to the entire Academy....
@~@~@~@~@~@~@~
In the Academy....
"Now, the importance of the removal of the cranium is directly related
to the removal of the brain tissue," Agent Dana Scully droned on. It was her
turn to lecture a new batch of trainees at the Academy this month and she
was not enjoying herself one bit. All they seemed to do was nod their heads,
scribble on notepads, and occasionally cough. What a bunch of losers! Why
can't they at least *challenge* me a little bit? Just like...Mulder! Damn!
Thoughts of him and her doing the horizontal polka on his desk...her hands
in his pants last night...Bad Dana! Bad! No dirty thoughts allowed! This is
not the time to-
Suddenly, the intercom in the classroom beeped on. Awaiting the message,
Scully kept silent.
"AAAAAAAEAAAAHHHHH!" Screamed out at the class, causing more than a few
to jump. A maniacal laughter followed the scream and then a muttered curse.
A very *colorful* curse involing aliens. Mulder! Dropping her clipboard on
the floor, Scully rush out the door for the pool where her partner was.
"Gentlemen! Get those backs out! Lift that iron! MOVE! MOVE! MOVE!" A.D.
Skinner barked at the new recruits. Teaching self-defense classes had been
one of his job as a marine before 'Nam broke out. Sometimes, the Academy
instructors allowed him to help them out once in awhile when they were short
a man or two. He was not prepared when he heard a shattering cry from a
familiar voice came over the intercom system.
"MULDER!" Agent Scully's voice came to his ears. Muttering a curse, he
ran out of the room to the pool door where the echo was coming from.
@~@~@~@~@~@~@~
In the Pool Room...
"MULDER!" Scully cried out as she saw, dimly, her partner at the bottom
of the deep end of the pool. Shrugging off her shoes and scrubs, wearing her
t-shirt and jeans, she dove into the pool and swam down to him.
Mulder, swimming up from his last dive, was surprised to see his partner
diving in above him. Figuring it was some sort of joke, he played dead and
grinned when she reached him; floating atop the water. Maybe he could even
sneak in a kiss for this if he was lucky. He felt himself being dragged to
the edge of the pool; feeling cement come into contact with his back.
"Mulder?" Scully cried, and began to do pound his chest to get the water
out. He didn't appear to be conscious - despite the large grin on his face.
Frantic, she checked all over his body for any signs of a wound or needle
puncture. As she was doing this, she felt large hands enclose over her and
move her out of the way. Looking up, she found herself face to face with
Skinner.
Skinner came upon the scene of Scully leaning over a comatose Mulder in
wet clothes. He motioned for Scully to stand back as he quickly looked over
his agent. There didn't look like any wounds of any sort and he motioned
for Scully to tilt his head back for CPR.
Mulder chuckled to himself as he felt warm breath cascade over his face.
Scully's breath smelled like mint and he breathed it in shallowly. A hand
pinched his nose and opened his mouth before hot lips descended on his to
blow air into his mouth. Reaching up, he grasped the person around the neck
and kissed them hard. Opening his eyes, he found himself face to face with...
Of all the things that Skinner had thought might happen today, this was
the least of them. Agent Mulder was *kissing* him as he tried to give the
man CPR. Suddenly, Mulder opened his eyes and leapt back as far as he could
from the A.D. But not before...
For the twenty years that Barney had been head janitor at the Academy he
had *never* in his life seen something like this. The A.D. of the FBI was
being *frenched* by one of his agents even as every FBI agent in the gym came
rushing into the room.
Scully laughed when she saw the expression on Mulder's face, but then
stifled it when she looked down and saw that, since she hadn't worn a bra
today and her t-shirt just *happened* to be white...her chest was now
properly exposed to 100 some testosterone male Academy students. Blushing
furiously, she stalked out the door with an even more embarassed Skinner on
her tail; leaving Mulder sitting there all alone with a somewhat bewildered
expression on his face.
@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~
Well, does anyone want a third story?
I'm game if you are...;)
E-mail me at 0029982@gps.gp.k12.mi.us with comments and snickers.
@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~
"I kissed a girl."
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