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I DON'T KNOW

You told me that you wanted me.
Awoke inside of me a wanton force.
Memories taunt me, disregard me,
Your influence extends only so far.
Emptiness resides within me,
Why is it I am the one who always loses?
Why is it me who always falls in the trap?
Captured by the tentacle of emotions,
Wrapping up... all around.
Slowly, slowly, slipping away from the shore.
My ambitions grounded; my pity roars.
You've turned and blown me away, turned me
Inside out with one wave of your hand.
Why is it I am still here?
What is it that I truly fear?
You've broken me time and again,
Can't you see I'm hurting?
All this pain, all this pain.
You've turned and blown me away,
Yet for some reason I still yearn to stay.
What am I to do?
I need to find myself again,
Searching for the thing you'll never give.
I need the truth, yes I do.
Got no more pride to share where friendship is concerned.
Tearing up inside of me, when will
All these feelings subside?
I don't know.
Heart beats like its on fire, but I'm freezing over now.
Walk along so lonely, the sky's a little blue,
Despair clouds hanging overhead,
Your memory treads in my wake, I guess I've been a fool.
I can handle any situation I need to handle,
But there's no need to take it seriously.
Nothing in life matters very much, and
Most things don't matter at all.
Lay my burdens down to sleep, and
Tell all the secrets I promised to keep.
If you can't trust me, why
Should I honour the trust I give to you?
Letting go is always so hard, no best way
To forget, no sign of fond regard.
Have I really sunk this low?
Will I ever fly again?
I don't know.
Moods pass over me like the shadows of clouds;
Rage, anger, despair, regret...
How come its "I need you" from me
To you and not from you to me?
Maybe its time to go...
Falling asleep again, Oh,
I don't know.

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