Author: Chauni

RP Session: Kazu

Scene: Kazu, coming to Cade with a message. Song: Touched, by VAST.

Touched

Kazu enjoyed American music.

If asked, he couldn't tell you why exactly, but could babble on about the haunting way the notes poured from tortured throats, and passion that leaked into every sound. He enjoyed lyrics that made little sense to him, more for a lack of knowledge of the foreign language than anything profound or deep, and in the late night hours, he would fish through his laptop, searching English websites for illusive words that were carried on quiet beats. Sometimes he could capture a entire part of a song, and would dissect it over and over again to find eight different meanings in a set of two lines.

At the cocktail parties and in the cool atmosphere of the clubs, he would converse with other bored individuals, curious on the sounds of this hypnotic beast, and CDs, burned for the convenience of all, would exchange manicured hands, and stereos would cry nothing but those chords for weeks.

Music was a comfort beyond clothes and makeup, a mesmerizing heartbeat that swallowed a person whole, a mouth of a beast that he walked willingly into.

The cool pale oceans of his eyes closed as he pressed the small headphone deeper into his ear. As he passed the familiar glass of the hotel, he halted midstep and stared in the dull reflection, staring at colorless eyes that met his own. He had passed up skirts and corsets and four inch heels today for a simple pair of dulled ebony leather pants and a button down white shirt, sleeves rolled to his elbows. The long obsidian tresses were pulled back by a simple, loose thong, letting loose a few strands to lap at his smooth cheeks.

Fingers, strangely bare without paint splashed across each nail, touched his ear, his mouth pulling towards a simple thin line. All the words were on his lips, waiting to be born on his tangled tongue, all the wants and needs screaming to be voiced.

Take me to America, and let's leave this all behind. Forget this pathetic fight, forget everything else, and let's just go. I'm sick of suffering for the whim of some pompous arrogant asshole! I...just want to be happy...and you, you make me happy...in ways I didn't think were possible...

He moved to familiar glass doors and followed memory-thick paths through the lobby and to the elevator. He ignored the hotel staff; they thought his "alter ego" was a cheap whore, and would that be too far from the truth? He pressed the illuminated button, he waited for metal doors to part, to allow him entry, to take him north towards his final destination.

Elevator music was drowned out by passionate voices coursing through thinly wound wires to his ears. He tapped his finger against the wall as he waited, floors passing too slow for his lacking restraint.

Come on, it'll be perfect. I'll do my design under a different name and mail it in; sure, I'll have to start over, but I'm young and it shouldn't be too hard. We can get a house together, near your family, and all this can be some bad dream, and we'll be able to sleep at night. I remember sleep sometimes...

And no one will find us...

Humming poured, following the soft words in his ears. He would tell everyone his singing voice was horrible and he dared not massacre any songs with vocals that were a shade too low to be a perfect female, and an inch too high to produce a decent male sound. So, instead, he would hum, something that was barely above the quiet breath that was born from his lungs.

You were always the one, you were always the one. I'm sorry for everything that's happened, for everything I put you through, but I...

Doors slid apart with a quiet sound that didn't have a chance against the headphones, and he walked the silent path to the door he had passed through how many times? The pads of his fingers slid down the painted wood, caressing it like he would a lover, eyes dark. Breath was hard, thick in the warm tubing of his throat, and knuckles rattled against the door.

In his ears rang one of the lines he knew, the calming melody wrapping tightly around him with flaring fingers.

" I, I looked into your eyes and saw
A world that does not exist;
I looked into your eyes and saw
A world I wish I was in."

The door was pulled away, and his eyes stared up at the familiar figure with long auburn hair, stared up at lips he had kissed and touched with every inch of himself. Images of bedsheets strewn, the soft scent of natural musk as the camera flashed, drugging fingers in his hair as he slipped beneath the water.

Tell him, Kazu. Tell him all those things you want to. Tell him to run away with you, and sleep beside you, and hold you when everyone else just...

Kazu watched as his name painted itself on the artist's lips, enraptured as the syllables fell away to die on his own deaf ears.

"I'll never find someone quite as touched as you."

Distance was soon nonexistent as he pressed lips to the other's, desperation thick in his breath, in his motions. Stunned shock surrounded him but he ignored it, shoving it aside as he simply focused on the feel of the other's palmers, on the mouth that fit so painfully perfect with his own.

Tell him!

His hands worked quickly, pushing the familiar cross-shaped piece of jewelry into the calloused, worked hand, closing those kind fingers around it, before letting his hand fall away. He felt naked, raw, open and bleeding without out, and so alone, so painfully alone, as if his mother had died all over again.

TELL HIM!

"I..."

It was strange not to be able to hear his own voice, his own words, drowned out by the music filling his senses. He felt underwater, crashed upon one wave and pulled, thrashing, down, until the notes were all he could hear.

"I'll never love someone quite the way that I loved you."

Tell him, goddamnit!

"I love you, Cade."

He tapped one finger to the sculptor's hand that now encased his mother's earring. He smiled, hollow, bitter, dead thing with could have died for its thousandth time and never have looked more miserable.

"Goodbye."

If the other said anything, he wasn't aware of it, trying to find some contentment in the water that surrounded him. His feet were quick to carry him away from the room that smelled of Cade, of the memories and the promises shared there. There was no time left for them, he was almost certain anymore, and a lonely apartment cried out for its lost master.

The elevator doors opened in a world devoid of sound, and he was quick to step through.

The End