Gethsemane II

Your dark eyes seeing
Realms I cannot conceive.
Your thoughts touching, molding others' lives,
Tracing their webs of memories, dreams, and emotions,
Guided only by the pure line of your will:
Clean, clear, cold as ice --
Passionless in your power.

Once you called to me,
Offering me visions and power of my own,
Bidding me set aside
The sadness, anger, despair, and hate
I found in this world.

But when I tried, I found
Emotions and events were twisted together,
Knotted into great ropes of memory,
Woven into the great cloth of Life.

With sadness came patience,
With anger came joy,
With despair came hope,
With hate came Love.

And I found
I could not follow you,
For the webs of memories would bind me,
The spirals of bright dreams would blind me,
And the emotions they evoked would remind me
     of what I was.

I could not follow your path
Nor grasp the glory you offered
For I found that I was human
And that I loved this world
Much too well to leave it.

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Copyright © 1997 by Peggy Ben-Fay Hu. All rights reserved.
This poem was originally published in the ISENFARINGS, the monthly newsletter
of the Shire of Isenfir, SCA Inc., as "O Father, let this cup pass from me ...."

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INDEX OF POEMS BY PEGASUS