Put away your G.I Joes and Barbies, for this next bottom-of-the-barrel picture show features everybody's fave possessed doll, Chucky. Lock the doors and bolt the toybox closed, because it's...
Child's Play 3
For those who didn't see the other two Child's Play movies, (OK, I know there's a lot of ya!) there was an 8 year old named Andy Barclay. Poor Andy had the bad luck of being chased by a doll, Chucky, who looks like Howdy Doody on acid. (all the more reason to burn your Tickle-Me-Elmo's, you wonder why they laugh like that) Apparently, the doll housed the soul of Charles Lee Ray, a serial killer with a heart of gold. Naturally, nobody believes Andy until they wind up stabbed, shot, impaled, or some other stuff your typical demonic doll would do. Andy thought it was all over with Chuck's "death" at the end of Child's Play 2. The word "sequel" apparently means nothing to Andy.

Anyway, 8 years after the last Child's Play, Chucky is reborn, thanks to the magic of crappy sequels. With the help of a computer, he locates the now-teenage Andy at a military school. Amazing what you can learn off the internet, huh?

Andy has new friends at the military school. He meets the diminutive Tyler, a new gal pal, and your typical nerdy tag-along. All is not good, as Chucky finds his way by mistake into Tyler's hands. Tyler and Chucky hit it off, they play games, which include Chucky trying to steal Tyler's body through soul transference. Seems hell-bent dolls have only souls on their minds, go figure.

Many unimportant people die at Chucky's hands. Andy starts to get that chilling feeling, not the one where he pays too much for his muffler, but that Chucky has come for him and to possess Tyler. Chucky decides to steal Tyler's soul at the annual WarGames. Chucky sabotages weapons, the nerdy guy gets a grenade in the gut, and Tyler flees for a nearby carnival. It's always a good idea to have a carnival less then two blocks away from a military camp. What could possibly go wroxng?

Anyway, Andy chases Chucky to a demon-roller-coaster-Satan-skull-ride-thing, kills Chucky, and saves little Tyler. Well, at least until Child's Play 48, where Chucky comes back to life for only the zillionth time and stalks Andy at a retirement home.

GEEZ! Ridiculous is not a word to describe this cinematic wormfood. See the whole trilogy, and you'll get what I mean. On the plus side (yeah, right), this film features one my fave characters, Sergeant Botnick, the barber. The guy takes sick pleasures in giving the boys crewcuts; it's as if he abandoned his social life to pursue a lifetime career as Hell's barber. I don't know, but when you watch as many movies as I do, and you see many generic characters, it's rewarding to find a Sergeant Botnick. I feel much better now. Not really, but it sure makes you feel good, right? Right?
 


This movie gets 4 cheezes out of 5 cheezes on the cheezi scale
Joe Mamma, the Official Pit Psychopath

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