Ho ho ho. In 1984, people picketed the film "Silent Night, Deadly Night." In that film, a guy wearing a Santa Claus costume went on a killing spree. Thousands hated it, saying it went against the holiday spirit. Obviously, these people never watched...
Ernest Saves Christmas
Ernest has a new job in Orlando, Fla., surprise, surprise! He is now a cab driver. As far as I'm concerned he is not THE cab driver, Alex Reiger (Judd Hirsch of "Taxi" fame). On his voyages, he meets a man who claims he's Santa Claus (in a film of this caliber, you don't doubt this sort of thing) and a cynical, non-believing teen named Pamela. It seems that "Santa" is in search of a popular children's show host to be the next Santa Claus. After several hundred years of being Santa, "Santa" needs a retirement. The children's show host, if I'm not mistaken, is Marilyn Manson.

Lots of "wackiness" ensues. There's too many things to mention, but I'll try to narrow it down. Reindeer are packed in UPS packages (elves are such scumbags.). There's a fictional film in this movie, titled "Christmas Slay", which ironically has a better plot than this movie. The ending of this film has Ernest flying around the world without a reindeer sled. The way they're flying, these reindeer must be whipped everyday. You can tell they're under a lot of stress, after being packed in boxes and all. All ends well, or to me, all ends, thank God, with the new Santa Claus taking charge of the sleigh. He's gearing up for a long 500 years of work.

The cynical teen best embodies my generation. She hates everything that Ernest and Santa stand for. She fails to believe the obvious, and only believes her opinions. It's nice to see strong willed characters in this sort of movie, considering that the Ernest films are the drag queens of the hill. The teen is the clearest example of a GenerationX youth, and remember that this garbage was made in 1988.

I'm gonna wrap up here. "Ernest Saves Christmas" is horrible, that goes without saying, but it is the best out of all of the Ernest films. This film should not deal with holidays, though. Ernest dealing with Christmas themes (Ernest learns the meaning of Christmas while hanging around a lot with a TEEN-AGE girl. This just screams icky all over. Ernest, hang out with adults. Pamela, hang out with teens. Ernest romancing teens is enough to make your skin crawl.) comes across as almost sacrilegious. Santa Claus serves as the peacemaker, saving the film from falling over into insanity. Oh wait, Ernest interacts with children every other second. Where's the sanity? Merry Christmas, seriously, I know it's early (or late or on time, depending on when you read this review), but hey! Tis the season!
 


This film gets a not-so-jolly 2 cheeze out of 5 cheezes on the cheezi scale.
Joe Mamma, Official Pit Psychopath and Half Man/Half Figgy Pudding

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