"Arthur: 'It's at times like this I wish I'd listened to my mother.' Ford : 'Why, what did she say?' Arthur: 'I don't know, I never listened.'" - Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

"We ask advice, but we mean approbation." - Charles Caleb Colton, Lacon

"Whatever advice you give, be brief." - Horace, Ars Poetica

"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't." - Erica Jong, How to Save Your Own Life

"I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it." - Harry S. Truman

"The only thing one can do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself." - Oscar Wilde

"Never play cards with a man called Doc. Never eat at a place called Mom's. Never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own." - NELSON ALGREN, quoted in Newsweek

"Who cannot give good counsel? 'Tis cheap, it costs them nothing." - ROBERT BURTON, The Anatomy of Melancholy

"Good but rarely came from good advice." - LORD BYRON, Don Juan

"Advice is seldom welcome; and those who want it the most always like it the least." - LORD CHESTERFIELD, Letters to His Son

"The advice of the elders to young men is very apt to be as unreal as a list of the hundred best books." - OLIVER WENDELL HOLMES, JR., speech (1897)

"I give myself sometimes admirable advice, but I am incapable of taking it." - LADY MARY WORTLEY MONTAGU, letter (1725)

"Many receive advice, few profit by it." - PUBLILIUS SYRUS, Maxims

"Go not to the elves for advice, for they will say both no and yes." - Tolkien, J. R. R.

"As you make your way through this hectic world of ours, set aside a few minutes each day. At the end of the year, you'll have a couple of days saved up." - Unknown 7-Year Old

"My young brother asked me what happens after we die. I told him we get buried under a bunch of dirt and worms eat our bodies. I guess I should have told him the truth--that most of us go to hell and burn eternally--but I didn't want to upset him." - Unknown 10-Year Old