"All dwarfs are by nature dutiful, serious, literate, obedient and thoughtful people whose only minor failing is a tendency, after one drink, to rush at enemies screaming 'Arrrrrrgh!' and axing their legs off at the knee." - Pratchett, Terry in 'Guards! Guards!'

"All dwarfs have beards and wear up to twelve layers of clothing. Gender is more or less optional." - Pratchett, Terry in 'Guards! Guards!'