the company-subsidized
cafeteria sells these
little cans of
Òmaximum-energyÓ.
theyÕre right
next to the register
so you canÕt miss
them when you leave.
they apparently
contain more caffeine
than 2 cups of strong,
black coffee
and have all kinds
of other energizing
ingredients in them
like ginseng and
yohimbe.
itÕs basically carbonated
crystal meth.
the executives
were getting complaints
from some floor managers
about us not
working hard enough
or fast enough,
so they felt it necessary
to offer this
product as a
possible solution.
now there
are a bunch of
jittery, wired people
running machinery
dangerous enough to
crush the skull of
some poor, skittish soul.
the company
looks at it as
improved efficiency
and a better
bottom line.
who can
argue with that?
-published in Nerve Cowboy