THE REST –    January 1
  

 

Today's Quotations — TIME

 

 

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But what minutes! Count them by sensation, and not by calendars, and each moment is a day and the race a life.

- Benjamin Disraeli

Day follows on the murkiest night, and, when the time comes, the latest fruits will ripen.

— Schiller

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O time! whose verdicts mock our own, the only righteous judge art thou!

- T. W. Parsons
 

The great rule of moral conduct is, next to God, to respect time.

- Lavater

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Time antiquates antiquities, and hath an art to make dust of all things.

-  Sir Thomas Browne

 

word puzzleToday's Word – MITIGATE

 


mit·i·gate verb 1. To moderate (a quality or condition) in force or intensity; alleviate.  Synonyms  relieve. To become milder. [Middle English mitigaten, from Latin mºtig³reºtig³re, mºtig³t- : mºtis, soft + agere, to drive, do]

You have done something to mitigate my feelings for the loathsome profession to which you unhappily belong.  Good-bye, Lord John. Science is, as I understand, a sealed book.

The Lost World 
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle


Definitions from American Heritage Dictionary

 

Today's Fact

 

Today's' fact about Time and its measurement, a time quotation and a New Year Inspiration.

New Year 6

 

  
 
They Did What?
They weren't always presidents - What did they do before becoming Presidents?

US Fact


What did they do
before they were President?

Calvin Coolidge earned his first money as a salesman of sorts. He sold apples and popcorn balls at town meetings. Later he worked as a craftsman in a carriage shop. There he hand-crafted toys.

James A. Garfileld dreamed of being a sailor. At age 16 he planned to make his dream come true. He hiked from his family farm to Cleveland, Ohio. No one at the docks was willing to take James on board as a hired hand. James then became a mule driver on the canal between Cleveland and Pittsburgh. Garfield was very accident prone. During his six weeks on the job he fell into the canal at least 14 times. After his many escapes from drowning, he quit his job and returned to school. dreamed of being a sailor. At age 16 he planned to make his dream come true. He hiked from his family farm to Cleveland, Ohio. No one at the docks was willing to take James on board as a hired hand. James then became a mule driver on the canal between Cleveland and Pittsburgh. Garfield was very accident prone. During his six weeks on the job he fell into the canal at least 14 times. After his many escapes from drowning, he quit his job and returned to school.

Before he became president, Herbert Hoover became a millionaire. He was not born into a wealthy family - he earned his money. As his first job he worked as an orphan farm boy picking potato bugs from plants. He earned one dollar for every 100 bugs he collected. He also earned spending money by picking strawberries and by collecting scrap iron for sale.

George Bush was born into a wealthy family. He postponed his admission to Yale to join the U. S. Navy at age eighteen. He signed aboard the aircraft carrier San Jacinto as an ensign. After completing service he was offered a desk at his father's international banking house. George did not take the Wall Street job. Instead he headed southwest to Texas. It was there where George Bush obtained his first civilian job in the oil fields. He job was sweeping floors and painting machinery

Source: A Treasury of Whitehouse Tales - Webb Garrison

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"Let every created thing give praise to the Lord,
for he issued his command, and they came into being. "

Psalm 148:5 (NLT)

 

 

 

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Today's SMILE

 

 

A cheerful heart is good medicine,
but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.
Proverbs 17:22 (NIV)

  
   

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A man was walking across the road when he met the accident. The impact was on his head which caused him to be comatose for two days before he finally regained consciousness. When open his eyes, his wife was there beside him. He held her hands and said meaningfully :

"You have always been beside me. When I was a struggling university student, I failed again and again. And sometimes, even my re-papers as well. You were always there beside me, encouraging me to go on trying.."

She squeezed his hands as he continued :

"When I went for all the major interviews and failed to clinch any of the jobs, you were there beside me, cutting out more adverts for me to apply..." He continued "Then I started work at this little firm and finally got to handle a big contract. I blew it because of one little mistake.

And you were there beside me."

Then I finally got another job after being laid off for sometime. But I never seem to be promoted and my hard work was not recognized. As such, I remained in the same position from the day I join the company till now...

And you were there beside me"

Her eyes brimmed with tears as she listened to her husband :"And now I
met an accident and when I woke up, you are here beside me....
....There's something I'll really like to say to you..."

She flung herself on the bed to hug her husband, and sobbing with emotion.

He said..., " I think you really bring me bad luck.."

Always remember to ask "why" first !!!!!

An 8 year old girl goes to her dad who is working in the yard and asks, "Daddy, what's sex"?

The father is surprised that she would ask such a question, but decides that if she is old enough to ask the question, then she is old enough to get a straight answer.

He tells her about the birds and the bees; the egg and the sperm; and   the male and female.  When he has finished explaining, the little girl is looking at him with her mouth opened, so the father asks her, "why did you ask this question"?

The little girl explains that "Mom told me to tell you that dinner would be ready in just a couple of secs".

The first morning after the honeymoon, the husband got up early, went down to the kitchen, and brought his wife her breakfast in bed. Naturally, she was delighted.

Then her husband spoke: "Have you noticed just what I have done?"

"Of course, dear; every single detail!"

"Good. Henceforth that's how I want my breakfast served every morning."

"Today," said the professor , "I will be lecturing about the liver and spleen."

Up in the gallery, one med student leaned toward the other, "Shoot, ift there's one thing I can't stand it's an organ recital!"

After a day of grueling maneuvers under the blazing Texas sun, the platoon stood in front of the barracks. "All right, ladies, think about this," bellowed the drill instructor. "If you could have ten minutes alone, right now, with anyone in the world, who would it be?"

Amid much mumbling, one voice was heard from the back row. "My recruiter."

A little boy was in a relative's wedding. As he was coming down the aisle he would take two steps, stop, and turn to the crowd (alternating between bride's side and groom's side." While facing the crowd, he would put his hands up like claws and roar.. so it went, step, step, ROAR, step, step ROAR, all the way down the aisle. As you can imagine, the crowd was near tears from laughing so hard by the time he reached the pulpit. The little boy, however, was getting more and more distressed
from all the laughing, and was also near tears by the time he reached the pulpit. When asked what he was doing, the child sniffed and said, "I was being the Ring Bear"........

Murphy's Law: Illustrated!

Original Murphy's Law:  "If anything can go wrong...it will."

Here are some situations...

- Anything dropped while working on a car will roll underneath to the *exact* center.

- The chances of a piece of bread falling butter side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.

- The worst or stupidest ideas are always the most popular.

TRUE FACT ...

Humans begin laughing at two to three months of age. Six year olds laugh about 300 times per day, while adults laugh from 15 to 100 times per day.

SOURCE: NYT, Dr. William F. Fry, Stanford University

 

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Phill Bower

 


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Copyright Information: Phillip Bower is not the author of the humor, and does not claim to own any copyright privileges to the jokes. Sources of jokes are listed when known. Birthday's and Happenings for the date, and quotations are public knowledge and collected from numerous sources. Quotations are public knowledge and sources are listed when known. Weekendspirations are written by Tim Knappenberger who has copyright privileges. Cathy Vinson authors Whispers from the Wilderness and owns copyright privileges. Weekendspirations and Whispers from the Wilderness are used with permission by the respective authors. Other devotions are written by Phillip Bower unless otherwise stated. In all cases credit is given when known. The Daily Miscellany is nonprofit. Submissions by readers is welcome.