ALL THE REST –    May 3
  

 

Today's Quotations – More Last Words

 

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Drink to me.

– Pablo Picasso 1973

 

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Bring me anything you like. If I don't take it I may take something else.

–    Saint Frances Xavier Cabrini 
The first US Saint, 1917

 

  
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 Make much of me as long as I live, for thou knowest I have given thee all when I die at thy disposal.

–  John Milton (1674)
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Four o'clock. How strange. So that is the time. Strange. Enough!

– Sir Henry Morton Stanley
Explorer (1904) 

 
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If this is dying, I don't think much of it!

–  Lytton Strachey
English critic and biographer (1938)  

 

Today's Short Words of  Wisdom



Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that's the stuff life is made of.

Benjamin Franklin

 

word puzzle
  Today's Word – VAPID 
   

 


 vap·id

 adjective. 1. Lacking liveliness, animation, or interest; dull: vapid conversation. 2. Lacking taste, zest, or flavor; flat: vapid beer. [Latin vapidus.]

Somehow he knew now, though he had never allowed himself to consider it before, that she couldn't in any way have been as naive or stupid as he had hoped and imagined. She had to have known how vapid he was, how shallow, and yes, cheap.

Left Behind
Tim LaHaye and Jerry B. Jenkins

Definitions from American Heritage Dictionary

 

Today's Fact

 May is frog Month on the Daily Miscellany - I hope you enjoy these facts about amphibians. God is a marvelous architect and his sense of humor and creativity is expressed in these interesting creations.

firebg.jpg (2091 bytes)

Amphibians and FROGS
frogs.wmf (17124 bytes) The Caecilians

Caecilians are amphibians that relatively unknown. There are 156 known species of Caecilians. They are worm-like, mostly secretive, burrowing amphibians confined to tropical and subtropical regions of the world. Their name 'Caecilians' means 'blind.' Most caecilians, however, have small eyes, which in some species are hidden beneath the bones of the skull. Most all caecilians are found living underground. A Few are found above ground at times. The Typhlonectets family of caecilians is aquatic.

The largest caecilian is Caecilia thomsoni of South America. It can reach lengths of up to 5 feet. The smallest is Grandisonia brevis of the Seychelles archipelago. It will reach a length of only 4 1/2 inches.

Caecilians are the only amphibians that are completely legless. They are able to move snake-like across surfaces when forced to, but normally live underground and move through preformed tunnels. They also create new tunnels by pushing their head through loose mud or moist soil. The caecilians are created perfectly for their environment. Their skull is powerfully constructed with a pointed snout and an underslung lower jaw or recessed mouth. These features allow the head to be used as a ram. The eyes are reduced in size and importance because there is no light in their underground world.

Caecilians have a unique pair of sensory organs called tentacles. A tentacle emerges from a groove or cavity on each side of the snout between the eye and the nostril. These tentacles are probably organs of taste and smell and are perfect for sensing the environment of their tunnels. The food and feeding habits of the caecilians have not been greatly studied. It seems that they are carnivorous and eat immature insects, insect larvae, earthworms, and occasionally small frogs and lizards. Like all amphibians, the skin of caecilians contains numerous poison glands. These glands function to discourage predators. Most caecilians have very subdued colors of gray and browns. There are some caecilians, however, that are brightly colored.

Unlike most amphibians, all caecilians have internal fertilization. A few caecilians lay eggs. The mother will remain with the eggs until they hatch. The few egg laying caecilians hatch into larvae and the larvae later metamorphose into adults. The larvae have tiny gills and gill slits. They live in seepage and streams until they metamorphose into adults. Most caecilians give birth to live young, and there is no larval stage.

Let every created thing give praise to the Lord,
for he issued his command, and they came into being.
Psalm 148:5 (NLT)

 

 

clown
Today's SMILE

 

A cheerful heart is good medicine,
but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.
Proverbs 17:22 (NIV)

  
   

 

 

"What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity. These are but trifles, to be sure; but, scattered along life's pathway, the good they do is inconceivable."

Joseph Addison

 

A FEW SMILES   

Hello Doctor 

The patient shook his doctor's hand in gratitude and said: "Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insult you by offering payment. But I would like for you to know that I had mentioned you in my will."

"That is very kind of you," said the doctor emotionally, and then added, "Can I see that prescription I just gave you? I'd like to
make a little change" 

A patient in a psychiatric hospital spent all day with his ear to the wall, listening. The doctor watched this person do this day after day. The doctor finally decided to see what he was listening to, so he put his ear up to the wall and listened. He heard nothing. So he turned to the patient and said, "I don't hear anything." The patient replied, "Yeah, I know. It's been like that for months!"

Einstein's Lecture

There's a story about how Albert Einstein was traveling to Universities in a chauffeur driven car, delivering lectures on his theory of relativity. 

One day, while in transit, the chauffeur remarked, "Dr. Einstein, I've heard you deliver that lecture about 30 times.  I know it by heart, and bet I could give it myself."

"Well, I'll give you the chance," Einstein said.  They don't know me at this next school, so when we get there I'll put on your cap, and you introduce yourself as me and give the lecture."

The chauffeur delivered Einstein's lecture flawlessly.  When he finished , he started to leave, but one of the Professors stopped him and asked a complex question filled with mathematical equations and formulas.

The chauffeur thought fast.  "The solution to that problem is so simple, he said, I'm surprised you have to ask me.  In fact, to show you just how simple it is, I'm going to ask my chauffeur to come up here and answer your question." 

A Kiss is just a Kiss

There was a married couple who were in a terrible accident.  The woman's face was burned severely. The doctor told the husband they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was so skinny.  The husband then donated some of his skin...however, the only place suitable to the doctor was from his buttocks.  The husband requested that no one be told of this, because after all this was a very delicate matter!

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty.  She looked more beautiful than she ever did before!  All her friends and relatives just ranted and raved at her youthful beauty! She was alone with her husband one day & she wanted to thank him for what he did.  She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me!  There is no way I could ever repay you!!!

He replied, "Oh don't worry, Honey, I get plenty thanks enough every time your mother comes over and kisses you on your cheek!!


Statistics are like bikinis.
What they conceal is more important than what they reveal.

 


Daily Miscellany Comics

 

Have A Great Day

Phillip Bower

 

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Copyright Information: Phillip Bower is not the author of the humor, and does not claim to own any copyright privileges to the jokes. Sources of jokes are listed when known. Birthday's and Happenings for the date, and quotations are public knowledge and collected from numerous sources. Quotations are public knowledge and sources are listed when known. Weekendspirations are written by Tim Knappenberger who has copyright privileges. Cathy Vinson authors Whispers from the Wilderness and owns copyright privileges. Weekendspirations and Whispers from the Wilderness are used with permission by the respective authors. Other devotions are written by Phillip Bower unless otherwise stated. In all cases credit is given when known. The Daily Miscellany is nonprofit. Submissions by readers is welcome.