ALL THE REST —  August 2
  

For the Birds
The Quails

The quails are small, plump members of the order Galliformes. Other larger members of this order of birds include: peafowls, pheasants, and chickens. The larger members of the order are notable for their long tails. The quails, however, are nearly tailless.

Quails are monogamous. Families tend to stay together in coveys that sometimes number more than 100 birds. Quails spend much of their life on the ground. They feed on the ground, eating insects and seeds. They nest on the ground and often have from 12 to 15 eggs in one clutch. The bobwhite quail roosts on the ground, while the other North American quails spend the night on branches of low trees and shrubs.

God has designed the quail specifically for its life on the ground. They have strong legs for fast and enduring running. They have short rounded wings. These wings are not designed for soaring, but enable the quail to lift from ground concealment into instant full flight. 
 

A cheerful heart is good medicine,
but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.
Proverbs 17:22 (NIV)

"What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity. These are but trifles, to be sure; but, scattered along life's pathway, the good they do is inconceivable."

Joseph Addison

 

Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused his dentist's Novocaine during root canal work?

He wanted to transcend dental medication.

from : Gaylene Carpenter

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cantaloupe (kant*e*lope) n: gotta get married in a church.

common knowledge (kom*an nol*ij) n: a source cited for a fact you just made up.

life (lif) n: begins when the kids leave home.

nap (naap) n:  what you send the kids to take so you can get some rest.

oops (oops) interj: a phrase that should immediately be followed by a reassurance that everything is under control.

politician (pol*i*tish*en) n: someone who begs for your vote for six months, then ignores your issues for four years.

salary (sal*a*ree) n: you get two-thirds of what he makes, but you do twice the work.

Saturday morning cartoons (Bugz Bun*ee) n: what you turn on "for the kids" - even when you don't have children.

some assembly required (komp*li*ka*ted) adj: means you need a Master's degree in engineering to put it together.

teddy bear (ted*ee baer) n: a companion who gives you a hug whenever you want, never snores, doesn't bother you when you're talking on the phone and doesn't eat the last chocolate chip cookie.

The above funnies come from Mrs. Webster's dictionary, a parody of Webster's dictionary.  It's a woman's view of the meanings of words. They were sent by Belle406(Michelle). I want to thank her so very much for taking the time to help with the Daily Miscellany.

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Praise does wonders for the sense of hearing.

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SIGNS OF BEING BROKE...

American Express calls and says, "Do leave home without it!"

Your idea of a 7-course meal is taking a deep breath outside a restaurant.

You're formulating a plan to rob the food bank.

You've rolled so many pennies, you've formed a psychic bond with Abe Lincoln.

Long distance companies don't call you to switch.

You look at your roommate and see a large fried chicken in tennis shoes.

You rob Peter and then rob Paul.

You finally clean your house, hoping to find change.

You think of a lottery ticket as an investment.

Your bologna has no first name.

You give blood everyday, just for the orange juice.

Sally Struthers sends you food.

McDonalds supplies you with all your kitchen condiments.

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A clergyman walking down a country lane and sees a young farmer struggling to load hay back onto a wagon after it had fallen off. "You look hot, my son," said the minister. "why don't you rest a moment,  and I'll give you a hand."

"No thanks," said the young man. "My father wouldn't like it."

"Don't be silly," the Pastor said. "Everyone is entitled to a break.   Come, sit down and have a drink of water."

Again the young man protested that his father would be upset. Losing his patience, the clergyman said, "Your father must be a real slave driver. Tell me where I can find him and I'll give him a piece of my mind for working you so hard!"

"Well," replied the young farmer, "he's under this load of hay."

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TRUE FACT ...

Humans begin laughing at two to three months of age. Six year olds laugh about 300 times per day, while adults laugh from 15 to 100 times per day.

SOURCE: NYT, Dr. William F. Fry, Stanford University

The Doctor's not as big a moron as he was.
Smarter? No, thinner.

Daily Miscellany Comics

Have A Great Day !

Phillip Bower

Soul Food for August 2

History for August 2