ALL THE REST —  October 30
  

 

Today's Quotations –  HYPOCRISY :

 


Hateful to me even as the gaits of Hades is he that hideth one thing in his heart and uttereth another.

Achilles in Homer's, Iliad, 10th Century BC



A hypocrite is someone who writes a book on atheism, and then prays it'll sell. 

Anonymous



As soon as you observe that everybody agrees with you, you can be sure they don't mean it. 
 
Anonymous



When a scolar speaks what he ought not to speak by guile of speech to gain some end, and when he does not speak, by guile of silence to gain some end--both these cases are of a piece with breaking through a neighbor's wall.

Mencius, Works of Mencius, 4th Century BC.



The characteristic modern malady is not plain and unvarnished materialism but sham spirituality. 

Irving Babbitt, Living Philosophies, 1931

 

word puzzle
  Today's Word – ADUMBRATE
   

 


Ad-um-brate 1. To give a sketchy outline of. 2. To prefigure indistinctly, foreshadow. #. To disclose partially or guardedly. [Latin adumbrare, to represent in outline:ad-, + umbra shadow]


Definition from American Heritage Dictionary

 

 

Today's Fact

 


FACT

Halloween
Halloween, perhaps it is not the children's fun time you think it is.

Many of our current Halloween tradition began more than 2000 years ago with the Celtic worship of their god Samhain. Sanhain was the lord of the dead. The Celts believed that as the sun grew pale, Samhain grew stronger. The festival was held November 1, the beginning of the Celtic New Year. On the night of the Vigil of Samhain, huge bonfires were lit to scare away the evil spirits of those who had died the previous year. This was the time to placate the supernatural powers controlling the natural process. This was also thought to be the time most favorable for divination concerning marriage, luck, health and death.

Burning whisps of straw lit from the bonfires were waved about in the air to scare away the demons and witches. They also dressed in horrible costumes. Disguised as a horrible spirit, they would be safe as the spirits would think that they were one of them.

The Celts believed that these spirits would come to your house. When they visited your house you had to treat them, so that they would not trick you.

The festival of the dead was gradually incorporated into Christian ritual. In the ninth century a feast in honor of all the saints (All Hallows) was fixed on November 1, and in the 11th century November 2 was specified as All Soul’s Day to honor the souls of the dead, particularly those who had died the preceding year.

One can see the similarities between the Vigil of Samhain and Halloween. Perhaps this is a holiday you would not wish to celebrate.


 
  "For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline."

 2 Timothy 1:7

Such love has no fear because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of judgment, and this shows that his love has not been perfected in us.

1 John 4:18 (NLT)

 

clown
Today's SMILE

 

A cheerful heart is good medicine,
but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.
Proverbs 17:22 (NIV)

  
   

 

 

"What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity. These are but trifles, to be sure; but, scattered along life's pathway, the good they do is inconceivable."

Joseph Addison

 

A FEW SMILES   


The Rarie

 An exotic animal collector finally was able to complete his collection with the acquisition of an juvenile member of a very unusual species called the Rarie. The animal looked like a furry, round ball, with feet on the bottom. However, the collector did not know much about this creature, especially how much it would grow. And it grew. As the Rarie grew, it ate more and more. And it grew at an alarming rate. The small animal enclosure had to be enlarged, and enlarged, and enlarged. All too soon, the size of the creature was becoming alarming, and the amount of food consumed was straining the collector's budget. Finally, in a state of desperation, he took the animal in a dump truck to the edge of a gigantic cliff with the idea that he would drop it over the edge. Just as the collector was getting set to roll the animal out of the truck, the animal popped open an eye and looked at him and asked, "Whatcha gonna do now?"

The collector explained how he could no longer afford the upkeep, and that dropping it over the cliff would be a humane way to get rid of such an expensive liability.

The animal looked over the edge and with a tear in its eye, it said, .... "It's a long way to tip a Rarie."


ODD SIGNS FROM ENGLAND

IN A LAUNDROMAT: Automatic washing machines. Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.

IN A LONDON DEPARTMENT STORE: Bargain Basement Upstairs

IN AN OFFICE: Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday please bring it back or further steps will be taken.

IN ANOTHER OFFICE: After the tea break staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board.

ON A CHURCH DOOR: This is the gate of Heaven. Enter ye all by this door. (This door is kept locked because of the draft. Please use side entrance)

OUTSIDE A SECOND HAND SHOP: We exchange anything - bicycles, washing machines etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain.

QUICKSAND WARNING: Quicksand. Any person passing this point will be drowned. By order of the District Council.

NOTICE IN A DRY CLEANER'S WINDOW: Anyone leaving their garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of.

IN A HEALTH FOOD SHOP WINDOW: Closed due to illness.

SPOTTED IN A SAFARI PARK: Elephants Please Stay In Your Car

NOTICE IN A FIELD: The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.

MESSAGE ON A LEAFLET: If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons.

ON A REPAIR SHOP DOOR: We can repair anything (Please knock hard on the door - the bell doesn't work)

SPOTTED IN A TOILET IN A LONDON OFFICE BLOCK: Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.

    I LOVE PUns:

  On an extremely windy day, a short, thin man was sweeping debris from the front walk of his store.  It was so windy,  and he was so light, he was having a rough time trying not to be blown away.  Suddenly he hit upon an idea.  He  gathered heavy rocks and put them in his shoes.  Then he continued with his work, repeating to himself, "Now I weigh  me down to sweep."

TRUCKING

A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. He passed a sign that said "low bridge ahead."

Before he knew it, the bridge was right ahead of him and he got stuck under the bridge. You could say that he got a rcok solid "Trucker's
Wedgie."

Cars were backed up for miles.

Finally, a police car pulled up. The cop got out of his car and walked around to the truck driver, put his hands on his hips and said,
"Got stuck, huh?"

The truck driver said, "No officer,... I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas!"

TRUE FACT ...

Humans begin laughing at two to three months of age. Six year olds laugh about 300 times per day, while adults laugh from 15 to 100 times per day.

SOURCE: NYT, Dr. William F. Fry, Stanford University

 


When she told me I was average, she was just being mean.

 

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Copyright Information: Phillip Bower is not the author of the humor, and does not claim to own any copyright privileges to the jokes. Sources of jokes are listed when known. Birthday's and Happenings for the date, and quotations are public knowledge and collected from numerous sources. Quotations are public knowledge and sources are listed when known. Weekendspirations are written by Tim Knappenberger who has copyright privileges. Cathy Vinson authors Whispers from the Wilderness and owns copyright privileges. Weekendspirations and Whispers from the Wilderness are used with permission by the respective authors. Other devotions are written by Phillip Bower unless otherwise stated. In all cases credit is given when known. The Daily Miscellany is nonprofit. Submissions by readers is welcome.