by Pat Nordman

The following is by Dr. Robert Wallace who writes a teen column. This is from the Orlando Sentinel, July 31, 1997:

Ten ways to make certain you keep a close friendship close.

1. Put yourself in your friend's shoes. Ask yourself, "What could she have been thinking when she did this?

2. Unclear as to how to handle a problem? Put some time and distance between you and your friend while you think about it. Clear your head. Then, when you're ready ...

3. Talk things out. Communicating your problems often strengthens and deepens your friendship. If you have trouble with words, write yourself a script and practice what you want to say.

4. Don't talk to other pals about your problem with her. That's unfair. After all, the issue is between the two of you, no one else. So go straight to the source.

5. When you talk, do it in private, not in public, where either of you may feel self-conscious or embarrassed.

6. If you're the type of person who can never bring yourself to say how you feel, then write your friend a letter. The point is to make sure you get things out in the open. It's when you clam up and ignore the problem that resentment grows and ruins a friendship.

7. Listen.

8. Be patient and give your friend time and encouragement to change.

9. Remember, even good people can act not so good sometimes!

10. Make up! It's not worth throwing away years of friendship over one upsetting incident.


We adults would do well to follow this advice, too!

Pat Nordman