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WHAT EXACTLY IS MARRIAGE?"Marriage is when you get to keep your girl and don't have to give her back to her parents!"
—Eric, age 6HOW DOES A PERSON DECIDE WHOM TO MARRY?
"You flip a nickel, and heads means you stay with him and tails means you try the next one."
—Kally, age 9WHAT IS THE PROPER AGE TO GET MARRIED?
"Eighty-four! Because at that age, you don't have to work anymore, and you can spend all your time loving each other in your bedroom."
—Carolyn, age 8"Once I'm done with kindergarten, I'm going to find me a wife!"
—Bert, age 5WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
"On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date."
—Martin, age 10WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
"You should never kiss a girl unless you have enough bucks to buy her a big ring and her own VCR, 'cause she'll want to have videos of the wedding."
—Allan, age 10"Never kiss in front of other people. It's a big embarrassing thing if anybody sees you. If nobody sees you, I might be willing to try it with a handsome boy, but just for a few hours."
—Kally, age 9THE GREAT DEBATE IS: IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
"You should ask the people who read Cosmopolitan!"
—Kirsten, age 10"It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need somebody to clean up after them!"
—Anita, age 9"It gives me a headache to think about that stuff. I'm just a kid. I don't need that kind of trouble."
—Will, age 7CONCERNING WHY LOVE HAPPENS BETWEEN TWO PARTICULAR PEOPLE
"No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with how you smell. That's why perfume and deodorant are so popular."
—Mae, age 9"I think you're supposed to get shot with an arrow or something, but the rest of it isn't supposed to be so painful."
—Manuel, age 8ON WHAT FALLING IN LOVE IS LIKE
"Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life."
—John, age 9"If falling in love is anything like learning how to spell, I don't want to do it. It takes too long."
—Glenn, age 7ON THE ROLE OF BEAUTY AND HANDSOMENESS IN LOVE
"If you want to be loved by somebody who isn't already in your family, it doesn't hurt to be beautiful."
—Anita, age 8"It isn't always just how you look. Look at me. I'm handsome like anything and I haven't got anybody to marry me yet."
—Brian, age 7"Beauty is skin deep. But how rich you are can last a long time."
—Christine, age 9CONCERNING WHY LOVERS OFTEN HOLD HANDS
"They want to make sure their rings don't fall off because they paid good money for them."
—Gavin, age 8CONFIDENTIAL OPINIONS ABOUT LOVE
"I'm in favor of love as long as it doesn't happen when 'Dinosaurs' is on television."
—Jill, age 6"Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me.
—Dave, age 8"I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough.
—Regina, age 10THE PERSONAL QUALITIES YOU NEED TO HAVE IN ORDER TO BE A GOOD LOVER
"Sensitivity don't hurt."
—Robbie, age 8"One of you should know how to write a check. Because, even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills."
—Ava, age 8SOME SUREFIRE WAYS TO MAKE A PERSON FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU
"Tell them that you own a whole bunch of candy stores."
—Del, age 6"Don't do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain't the same thing as love."
—Alonzo, age 9"One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it's something she likes to eat. French fries usually works for me."
—Bart, age 9HOW CAN YOU TELL IF A COUPLE EATING DINNER AT A RESTAURANT ARE IN LOVE?
"Just see if the man picks up the check. That's how you can tell if he's in love."
—Bobby, age 9"Lovers will just be staring at each other and their food will get cold. Other people care more about the food."
—Bart, age 9"Romantic adults usually are all dressed up, so if they are just wearing jeans it might mean they used to go out or they just broke up."
—Sarah, age 9"See if the man has lipstick on his face."
—Sandra, age 7"It's love it they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They like to order those because it's just like how their hearts are...on fire."
—Christine, age 9HOW WAS KISSING INVENTED?
"I know one reason that kissing was created. It makes you feel warm all over, and people didn't always have electric heat or fireplaces or even stoves in their houses."
—Gina, age 8HOW A PERSON LEARNS TO KISS
"You learn it right on the spot when the gooshy feelings get the best of you."
—Brian, age 7"It might help to watch soap operas all day."
—Carin, age 9WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
"It's never okay to kiss a boy. They always slobber all over you. That's why I stopped doing it."
—Tammy, age 10"If it's your mother, you can kiss her anytime. But if it's a new person, you have to ask permission."
—Roger, age 6HOW TO MAKE LOVE ENDURE
"Spend most of your time loving instead of going to work."
—Dick, age 7"Don't forget your wife's name...that will mess up the love."
—Erin, age 8"Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out the trash."
—Dave, age 8"Feed her lots of chocolate until she gets a stomach ache, then take care of her until she feels better. When she realizes that you really love her because you really took good care of her, ask her to buy you a new surfboard..."
—Rod, age 8
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