1. Discuss the early leaders. In symmetrical relationships, there is more helping among participants. Asymmetrical tendancies showed up in many schizophrenic families. Bateson and Jackson did therapy by trying first to make all the rules of the family explicit, not marital quid pro quo. Second, they worked on symmetry in the family, dealing with issues together, and taking joint responsibility. Men who help raise their children tend to live about 5 or 6 years longer. It is important for both parents to be involved.

Nathan Ackerman was the chief child psycologist in Pennsylvania, and he worked closely with children in coal mining families. He was the first counselor to use a sliding scale fee, charging his clients based on their ability to pay. He emphasized that clients were individuals as well as family members. He really focused on the individual. It is easy in Marriage and Family Counseling to lose track of the individuals involved. He was a psychoanalyst but started integrating family issues into his sessions during the 1940s and 1950s. His treatment approach was problem-oriented, not technique-oriented. He focused on the problem and deemphasized technique. He did have patterns, and he believed in being deeply committed to the family. In fact, he thought that his commitment alone would encourage positive change. He came up with "Interpersonal Unconscious," which is an unconscious system specifically set to the family. He said that there was such a thing as a family unconsciously doing things without even being aware of it. This factor is also called the family dance. He also focused on family conflicts and how the family was dealing with them. He was more content and less process-oriented. He focused on patterns of communications. He focused on distance and proximity in the family.

Ackerman focused on family secrets, and this is very important. Individuals who keep secrets lose energy, and this is very, very crucial to the family. Secrets channel energy. They will even hurt the counselor's relationship with the Lord and with the spouse. Therapists and counselors have to keep a lot of secrets, and it is tough on them. They can seek supervision or counselors of their own. Each state of the person (emotional, spiritual, physical, cognitive) affects the whole person. Letting down in one area can bring the person down in others. Churches that keep secrets can be destroyed, too. The members will not have enough energy to minister to one another. On the other hand, though, people should not tell everything, either. Counselors would probably be wise to videotape their sessions. Secrets have power, and that power is diffused once the secret is released. It is very important for the counselor to be honest with their spouse without compromising the confidentiality of their patients.

				Tom of Bethany

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