Selected Essays And Book Reviews
COUN 601 - Marriage and Family Counseling
Lesson 14. Definitions and Coping Strategies {494 words}
1. Discuss some important definitions.
Coaching is a technique that helps individuals make appropriate responses by giving them verbal instructions. Counselors sometimes tell the family what to do if they are an impasse.
Culturally Encapsulated Counselors (rigid piece around counselor) are therapists who treat everyone the same, and ignore appropriate differences. Every family is treated exactly the same way, and this is not healthy for the family because cultures can be important. Enmeshment is healthy in some cultures.b
Emotionally Cut-off is a Bowenian concept used to describe a family in which members avoid each other physically or emotionally, due to unresolved emotional attachments.
Family of Origin (f.o.o.) is the family that the person is born or adopted into. It tells the counselor who the client grew up with.
Mimesis is a way of joining whereby the therapist becomes or imitates the family manner or content of the communication. If the therapist jokes with a jovial family or is sad with an unhappy family, then he is mimicking the family. This can be risky, but it can also join the family. Counselors need to set boundaries for themselves.
Miracle Question is a brief therapy technique that asks the patient what a miracle solution to their problem would look like.
2. Name the eleven coping strategies of healthy families.
A. The ability to identify the stressor in the family.
B. Viewing a situation as a family problem rather than the problem of one member. Having an identified patient is not healthy. Family should be "we" not "I".
C. Adopting a solution-oriented approach rather than blaming.
D. Showing tolerance for family members. Christian families often do not show tolerance, and a lack of tolerance often means that the adult has not worked through some issues, either. Remember that Christ was very tolerant of everyone.
E. Clear expression of commitment to the family and affection for other family members.
F. Open and clear communications is essential among family members.
G. Evidence of high family cohesiveness, meaning that the family is connected. Members of the family need to move towards interdependence through their own choice.
H. Evidence of role flexibility. It is unhealthy for families to have rigid roles.
I. Appropriate use of resources inside and outside of the family. A healthy family will seek resources outside the family when necessary.
J. No physical violence in the family at all, no exceptions. Violence gives children the wrong ideas about right and wrong.
K. A lack of substance abuse.
Tom of Bethany
"He that hath the Son hath life; and he that hath not the Son of God hath not life." (I John 5:12)
"And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart." (Jeremiah 29:13)
Index to Selected Essays And Book Reviews
Lesson 15. Unhealthy Families and Integration
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