Money
"Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons." - Woody Allen
"Every man is the architect of his own fortune." - Appius Claudius Caecus, quoted by Sallust, 'Speech to Caesar on the State'
"If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning." - Aristotle
"Money is like muck, not good except it be spread." - Francis Bacon, Essays
"Money speaks sense in a language all nations understand." - Aphra Behn, The Rover
"What is robbing a bank compared with founding a bank?" - Bertolt Brecht, The Threepenny Opera
"Those who have some means think that the most important thing in the world is love. The poor know that it is money." - Gerald Brenan, Thoughts in a Dry Season
"Money was made, not to command our will, But all our lawful pleasures to fulfil. Shame and woe to us, if we our wealth obey; The horse doth with the horseman away." - Abraham Cowley
"If you'd know the value of money, go and borrow some." - Benjamin Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanac
"The fundamental evil of the world arose from the fact that the good Lord has not created money enough." - Heinrich Heine
"A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it." - Bob Hope, quoted in Life in the Crystal Palace by Alan Harrington
"Money is a handmaiden, if thou knowest how to use it; a mistress, if thou knowest not." - Horace
"No man's credit is as good as his money." - Edgar Watson Howe
"When a man says money can do anything, that settles it: he hasn't got any." - Edgar Watson Howe
"A man is usually more careful of his money than he is of his principles." - Edgar Watson Howe
"What makes all doctrines plain and clear? About two hundred pounds a year. And that which was proved true before, prove false again? Two hundred more." - Samuel Johnson
"The safest way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket." - Frank McKinney Hubbard
"We all belong t' th' union when it comes t' wantin' more money and less work." - Frank McKinney Hubbard
"The two most beautiful words in the English language are : 'Cheque enclosed'." - Dorothy Parker
"Money is the most important thing in the world. It represents health, strength, honour, generosity and beauty as conspicuously as the want of it represents illness, weakness, disgrace, meanness and ugliness." - George Bernard Shaw
"The seven deadly sins...Food, clothing, firing, rent, taxes, respectability and children. Nothing can lift those seven millstones from man's neck but money; and the spirit cannot soar until the millstones are lifted." - George Bernard Shaw
"When is a question of money, everybody is of the same religion." - Voltaire
"One man's wage increase is another man's price increase." - Harold Wilson
"Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level. It's cheaper." - Crisp, Quentin
"Any change to the salary plan will result in less money for you. If they wanted to give you 'more' money, they wouldn't have to go through all the trouble of changing the plan. Big Book of Business', illustrated by Scott Adams" - Dogbert in 'Building a Better Life by Stealing Office Supplies: Dogbert's 1991
"Never base your budget requests on realistic assumptions, as this could lead to a decrease in your funding. Big Book of Business', illustrated by Scott Adams" - Dogbert in 'Building a Better Life by Stealing Office Supplies: Dogbert's 1991
"Wisdom is the wealth of the wise." - Ecclesiasticus (200 B.C.?)
"When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: 'Whose?'" - Marquis, Don
"Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys." - O'Rourke, P. J.
"Give me the strength to change the things I can, the grace to accept the things I cannot, and a great big bag of money." - Unknown 13-Year Old
"Money, it turned out, was exactly like sex, you thought of nothing else if you didn't have it and thought of other things if you did." - JAMES BALDWIN, Nobody Knows My Name
"I'm tired of Love: I'm still more tired of Rhyme.
"A feast is made for laughter, and wine maketh merry: but money answereth all things." - BIBLE, Ecclesiastes 10:19
"The love of money is the root of all evil." - BIBLE, I Timothy 6:10
"What makes all doctrines plain and clear?
"It has been said that the love of money is the root of all evil. The want of money is so quite as truly." - SAMUEL BUTLER (d 1902), Erewhon
"Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen nineteen and six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pounds ought and six, result misery." - CHARLES DICKENS, David Copperfield
"Never ask of money spent
"Money is a singular thing. It ranks with love as man's greatest source of joy. And with death as his greatest source of anxiety." - JOHN KENNETH GALBRAITH, The Age of Uncertainty
"The Almighty Dollar, that great object of universal devotion throughout our land." - WASHINGTON IRVING, The Creole Village
"There are few ways in which a man can be more innocently employed than in getting money." - SAMUEL JOHNSON, quoted in James Boswell's The Life of Samuel Johnson
"It is better that a man should tyrannize over his bank balance than over his fellow citizens." - JOHN MAYNARD KEYNES, The General Theory of Employment, Interest and Money
"Money is like a sixth sense without which you cannot make a complete use of the other five." - W. SOMERSET MAUGHAM, Of Human Bondage
"Money couldn't buy friends but you got a better class of enemy." - SPIKE MILLIGAN, Puckoon
"I finally know what distinguishes man from the other beasts: financial worries." - JULES RENARD, The Journal of Jules Renard, ed. Louise Bogan and Elizabeth Roget
"Never invest your money in anything that eats or needs repainting." - BILLY ROSE, in New York Post
"There are few sorrows, however poignant, in which a good income is of no avail." - LOGAN PEARSALL SMITH, Afterthoughts
"There was a time when a fool and his money were soon parted, but now it happens to everybody." - ADLAI E. STEVENSON, quoted in Bill Adler's The Stevenson Wit
"There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it, and when he can." - MARK TWAIN, Following the Equator, Pudd'nhead Wilson's New Calendar
But Money gives me pleasure all the time."
- HILAIRE BELLOC, Fatigued
About two hundred pounds a year.
And that which was prov'd true before,
Prove false again? Two hundred more."
- SAMUEL BUTLER (d 1680), Hudibras
Where the spender thinks it went.
Nobody was ever meant
To remember or invent
What he did with every cent."
- ROBERT FROST, The Hardship of Accounting