"As I was leaving this morning, I said to myself 'the last thing you must do is forget your speech.' And sure enough, as I left the house this morning, the last thing I did was to forget my speech." - Rowan Atkinson, Live in Belfast

"Whatever words we utter should be chosen with care for people will hear them and be influenced by them for good or ill." - Buddha

"A dog is not considered a good dog because he is a good barker. A man is not considered a good man because he is a good talker." - Chuang-Tzu

"As a vessel is known by the sound, whether it be cracked or not; so men are proved, by their speeches, whether they be wise or foolish." - Demosthenes

"Nature has given men one tongue and two ears, that we may hear twice as much as we speak." - Epicetus, fragment

"Well done is better than well said." - Benjamin Franklin

"I have never seen an ass who talked like a human being, but I have met many human beings who talked like asses." - Heinrich Heine

"In labouring to be concise, I become obscure." - Horace

"The educated Southerner has no use for an 'R', except at the beginning of a word." - Mark Twain

"Your mind is on vacation, but your mouth is workin' overtime." - Allison, Mose [jazz piano-vocalist]

"It is the province of knowledge to speak and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen." - Holmes, Oliver Wendell (1809-1894)

"He who speaks without modesty will find it difficult to make his words good." - Kung Fu-tse [Confucius] (551-479 B.C.)

"The superior man is modest in his speech, but exceeds in his actions." - Kung Fu-tse [Confucius] (551-479 B.C.)

"If you travel to the States ... they have a lot of different words than like what we use. For instance: they say 'elevator', we say 'lift'; they say 'drapes', we say 'curtains'; they say 'president', we say 'seriously deranged git'." - Sayle, Alexei

"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." - Voltaire (1694-1778)