Things started to go a bit wappy in February · According to The Times, The Telegraph and The Daily Mail, who merged yesterday, the BBC made Frederick West a killer. The corporation is alleged to have maliciously tampered with West’s gene pool while he was an embryo.
· A squirrel from Nut Magazine has found that Safeway supermarket’s £25 advertising campaign produced the most effluent of 1996, reports The Guardian.
· Sir William Brown, the retard chairman of Scottish Television, has died aged 167. His corpse appears in today’s Independent.
· LWT yesterday maimed a puppy after winning no TV awards, reports The Guardian and The Telegraph, authoritatively