Scene Six
We hear a very vintage telephone ringing. Then
a section of Irene's hotel room at the Astor slides into view. She is surrounded
by open boxes all displaying beautiful and expensive clothes. She wears
a very chic negligee as she picks up the receiver.
IRENE
Allo?
(Now the lights come up upstage left in Horace's private office.
HORACE sits sheepishly at his desk. CARSTAIRS is standing with the phone
in his hand.)
CARSTAIRS
Madame Polenska?
IRENE
Oui.
CARSTAIRS
This is Norbert Carstairs, Mr. Standish's assistant.
IRENE
Ah, yes! That adorable young man with the pince nez.
CARSTAIRS
Mr. Standish would like me to tell you that our company has decided
not to publish "Five Years With the Masters."
IRENE
What?...I do not hear you properly. This must be a very bad connection.
It sounds like you said that your company is backing out of our agreement.
CARSTAIRS
I'm afraid you heard correctly.
IRENE
Let me speak to that horse's ass!
CARSTAIRS
I'm afraid that horse's ass is not available.
IRENE
I'll sue him for every stinking piece of furniture in that smelly office!
HORACE
Tell her no contracts have actually been signed.
CARSTAIRS
Well, you see, Madame Polenska since no contracts have actually been
signed...
IRENE
It was a gentleman's agreement---if you can call it that with that quince!
A verbal commitment. I will take this to the highest court in the land!
That vermin! That dogfaced charlatan! That walking cuspidor!
HORACE
Hang up.
CARSTAIRS
I'm sorry, Madame Polenska. I have to go.
(Lights go out in Horace's office, but remain on in Irene's
hotel room. SHE clenches her fists and collapses on the settee.)
IRENE
I'll get even with that bastard!
I am captain of my ship,
I am master of my soul...
(SHE stops. The telephone rings again.)
IRENE
So you changed your mind, did you?
(SHE picks up the receiver. Lights rise now upstage left. Charlotte's
library slides into view. Her French maid, EDWIDGE, is talking into the
phone.)
EDWIDGE
Madame Polenska? This is Mlle. Cotrelly's personal maid.
IRENE
Yes. We met on the Oceanic. It is Edwidge, is it not?
EDWIDGE
How kind of you to remember.
IRENE
I do not forget great beauty.
EDWIDGE
Oh, madame, mais non!
IRENE
Oh, mademoiselle, mais oui.
EDWIDGE
Mais non, non, non!
IRENE
(rolling her eyes in disgust)
Mais oui, oui, oui. Does dear Charlotte wish to speak with
me?
EDWIDGE
Non, madame. Mlle. Cotrelly is not here. She wanted me to call
you to tell you the celebration for you has been postponed.
IRENE
Postponed? Postponed till when?
EDWIDGE
She did not say. She left this morning.
IRENE
Left? For where?
EDWIDGE
Her honeymoon.
IRENE
She got married?
EDWIDGE
Oui, madame. To Monsieur Braden.
(IRENE lets the receiver drop. SHE stands in the center of the
room in shock. The music of Captain of My Ship is played as a dirge.)
LIGHTS SLOWLY DIM