"Cynic, n. a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be."
--Ambrose Bierce
"Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them."
--Joseph Heller, Catch-22
"Do not overestimate the decency of the human race."
--H. L. Mencken
"Most people would rather die than think -- in fact, they do."
--George Santayana
"By all means marry. If you get a good wife you will become happy, and if you get a bad one you will become a philosopher."
--Socrates
"The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year."
--Mark Twain
"It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand."
--Mark Twain
"Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who has merely laid an egg cackles as if she had laid an asteroid."
--Mark Twain
"We have ridiculed the absolute truth of Your Word and called it pluralism; We have worshipped other gods and called it multiculturalism; We have endorsed perversion and called it an alternative lifestyle; We have exploited the poor and called it the lottery; We have neglected the needy and called it self-preservation; We have rewarded laziness and called it welfare; We have killed our unborn and called it choice; We have shot abortionists and called it justifiable; We have neglected to discipline our children and called it building self- esteem; We have abused power and called it political savvy; We have coveted our neighbor´s possessions and called it ambition; We have polluted the air with profanity and pornography and called it freedom of expression; We have ridiculed the time- honored values of our forefathers and called it enlightenment."
--Pastor Joe Wright, in an opening prayer for the Kansas Senate
Page last updated 2001-05-18