Subreality Retirement Home by Ben Church b_church@yahoo.com Feedback! Please! The bouncer didn't like it, but he let them pass. It was a bit irregular, but not completely unheard of. That he knew of. Could be that whoever was writing him at the moment simply didn't know of any rules against it. The two Non-X fictives decided it was better not to tell the bouncer who was coming as well. He'd just worry. The tall boy with long brown hair stopped in the doorway, a little intimidated. The blond girl with him looked back, an amused smile on her face. "You're not usually this shy." she smirked. "I'm not usually thrust completely out of my element like this." he protested. "I mean, Vampires, Demons, and Immortals are one thing, but, okay Mutants aren't all that different I guess. But the environment..." The girl nodded sympathetically. "Yeah, I feel like a Hippie at an NRA party." He nodded. "I would have said a Preppy at a Goth Club, but you get the idea. Besides, he's not likely to be happy to see us. Why'd Ben choose us to come to this shindig anyway?" She looked at the bar, where many fictives were gathered around, singing "For he's a jolly good fellow". No one had noticed their entrance yet. "Well, since you're sort of replacing him-" "I am not! Well sort of, but he's got lot's of other charectors he's writing stories almost completely unrelated to the shows or movies he derived them from." He paused, blinked and looked up towards the cieling. "Way to write a run-on sentance Ben." he muttered. "Fine, you're not exclusively replacing him. I don't know why he didn't send Tut, Sean or any of the others. I guess he just thinks you're the one mature enough to handle it." "Then why are you here?" "To back you up. I'm the Slayer remember?" Then she realized what he'd said. "Hey!" "All right," Joe sighed. "If we're gonna do this, let's do it." "My thoughts exactly." Buffy smiled. Will sat in shock, barely registering the well wishes of the fictives surrounding him. Tornado tried to bring him out of his funk, to no avail. He looked helplessly at Manchild and a Sabertooth fictive, the latter being one of the more sedate ones. "He just sits there." Aaron said. "I don't know what to do." "Well we gotta think of something to cheer him up." Sabertooth muttered. The ficitves around them started into another chorus of "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow". "Shut up!" Jim/Armand shouted. "It's not working!" He sighed and took a drag from the joint that a very stoned Jubilee had handed him. He looked from the joint to Will. "You think...?" "Probably not." a Gambit said. "This one don't smoke, and the first time don't do anythin'." He winced at his own accent. Sharp Shot looked around at the cafe. "Where are all the rest of him anyway?" he asked. "This place is usually crawling with Hotshots." "They took off when they got the news." M explained. "Turns out Ben hasn't quite given up on them." "'Course not." Jim said. "You don't have to keep elseworlds stories current, or write them in order." "In order?" Hotshot suddenly said. "Hah! He's not worried about writing the other genres in order!" "Oops," a voice said. "What a cue line." The fictives turned and faced the newcomers. No one recognized them, except Jim, and a few of the others who watched Buffy. Hotshot jumped in surprise. He'd never seen the blond girl until a few minutes ago when his entire life, even parts he hadn't lived yet flashed before his eyes. Seemed he and the X-Tremes would have played on an episode of Buffy. But this wasn't Sarah Michelle Gellar, this was Buffy. And the boy next to her he knew only from a passing aquaintence. "Joe." he greeted. "Buffy. Welcome to my retirement party." He gave a wan smile. "Ben couldn't make it?" "He's coming." Buffy reassured him. "Good," a Wolverine growled. "I've got a few things to say to him when he does." "Yeah." an AoA Sabertooth agreed. "I helped train this kid, and I don't like seein' him let down." "You did?" Shea O'Riley asked. "It didn't know you were _that_ Sabertooth." "I'm not." Sabertooth admitted. "I gave up trying to figure it out long ago." Buffy tensed when something nudged her boot. She looked down, and with horror saw that a pink bunny slipper was sniffing her. It was soon distracted by one of Jim's little, friends. With a sigh, she returned her attention to the matter at hand. "Ben sent us on ahead." she said. "You know, as like, moral support." "Moral support?" Will laughed. "Yeah, whatever." he rose from his stool and picked up the duffle bag sitting at it's foot. "Thanks for trying guys." He headed for the door. "But let's face it. Who even read the stories anyway?" "Geez I didn't know you had such low self-esteem." Joe said, catching up to him. "Not many people read my stories either but-" "Give it time." Will said, pausing. "I was like you once, idealistic, filled with enthusiasm for my work. But then I fell more and more behind in continuity. I started being placed on the back burner while charectors like you were dreamed up. While I was joined at the bar by endless versions of me. Just wait. You'll be replaced one day too." "What," Buffy said. "Just becuase Ben had a life you're gonna hold that against him?" "Actually the sad thing is he doesn't." Joe said. "He just has other things to do that don't involve having a life." And then he was there. He stood in the doorway, looking at the crowd in disapointment. "Jeez, this is it?" he said. Ben came in and surveyed the cafe. "I would have thought at least Kielle would be here." "Well it was kind of short notice." Will said. "You fire me and then right off write this party. You didn't give anyone time to react." Ben looked at him levely. "I didn't fire you. Had I done that, I would have just left you unfinished. But you know everything that has, or will happen to you. "Look," he went on. "For what it's worth, I truly am sorry. You're my first charector. I had you in my mind before I even knew that fan-fic existed. I'm never gonna forget you, and your strife is over. You've got a wonderfull girlfriend, a great musical career, both of which you owe to me. Because I like you. I think you're a great charector." The he placed his hand on his shoulder. "And who knows. This may just turn out to be temporary. I might suddenly get inspired, or maybe another writer will pick you up." Will snorted, but he did look a little better. "There's only one thing left to say." Ben concluded. "I hereby give you, Hotshot, free will. You are no longer confined to my wishes, or my typing. You're mind is your own, your life is your own. Enjoy it." With that, he left. Joe and Buffy, looking slightly relieved to be leaving the place that was not their genre hurried after him. Hotshot stood, in a bit of shock. He had free will. Now what? The cold A&W in his hand felt good in the heat. His wide brimmed straw hat kept the sun out of his eyes. The Subreality Retirement Home was a nice place. Blink came to visit him every day, he performed fairly often, but after the day was over, he came here. It was quiet, which, after the hectic life he'd lived, was wonderfull. To his right was a mountain range, placed there by Ben, another parting gift. And the cafe was not far away. He still went there every now and then, for reunions and such. Besides, it was where he got his Root Beer. His acoustic guitar was in his lap, earlier, Manchild had been by, and they'd jammed. Now he sat, enjoying his solitude, in a rocking chair on the front porch. Blink was coming by later. He listened to the radio, which was talking about a fight that had broken out at the bowling alley when a Shipper Mulder got drunk and tried to kiss the wrong Scully. He chuckled something about "Fictives today", and took a sip from his Root Beer. Maybe retirement wouldn't be so bad after all. The End Disclaimer: Manchild: David J. Warner Aaron Thall: Aaron Thall Jim/Armand: Aoife Sharp Shot: Sharp Shot Shea O'Riley: Perri Smith Bunny Slippers: Abyss