 |
| “Did you mom marry Mr. Rogers?” “Dork, you are a parents wet dream, okay?” “Impossible Sir, it’s in Johnson’s underwear” “Oh shit! What do we do if we have to take a piss? If you gotta go, you gotta go” “Hey, homeboy, why don’t you go close that door and we’ll get the prom queen impregnated” “I don’t have it. Screws fall out all the time, the world’s an imperfect place” “Eat my shorts” “But what if there’s a fire? I think violating fire codes and endangering the lives of children would be unwise at this juncture in your career, Sir” “You’re right, it’s wrong to destroy literature, it’s such fun to read” “Obscene finger gesture from such a pristine girl!” “Hey, cherry. Do you belong to the physics club?” “How are we suppose to know, we’re not suppose to move right?” “Well I’m free the Saturday after that, beyond that I’m gonna have to check my calender” “Not even close, BUD!” “What can I say, I’m THRILLED!” “You’re an idiot anyway. But if you say you get along with your parents, well then you’re a liar too” “I’m being honest asshole, I would expect you to know the difference” |
 |
| More John Bender One Liners |
 |