"The Island"

Gossip

Week Three :

Going into the third week the characters are trying to prove their self worth in order to remain on The Island and win the ultimate prize. Especially after the prize for winning has finally been revealed. They learned the winner would appear in Barbra Streisand’s upcoming TV project “Mame”!

After a fight with Anshel over communism Katie’s creative juices started to flow. This made her finally agree to teach at Rose Morgan’s new school. Katie is giving a class in swearing.  She's up to the F's.  Rumor has it Katie is interested in an island man, has let her hair get curly again and has taken up Pagan Cookery to impress him. She is up to the F’s in cooking also: fingers flambé. Claudia and Doris were competing to be the top of Katie’s class until Evil Fanny enrolled. Even they knew there was no contest. She can swear in both English and Yiddish.

Doris and Claudia have become inseparable. For Claudia’s birthday Doris got her a pair of panties with Claudia’s name on them. They became secretive and the other Islanders heard pounding late into the night. When their project was finally revealed it angered the group because they thought it was a complete waste of time. The two women built a go-go dancing cage for Doris. Evil Fanny commented they should have been trying to catch fish or go in the woods and hunt for tapioca instead of working on that "facockta" project. Their next project is a TV so Doris (and the rest of the group) can sleep. Each islander is expected to take turns doing TV shows for Doris so the group could get some much needed sleep. They are not happy.

Judy flagged down a helicopter and took the pilot's lunch, which happened to happen to be roast beef. She has also taken a liking to Anshel. Judy follows him around The Island now calling him Sam. She’s torn his black jacket three times so far. The needle and thread she brought as her one luxury item has come in very handy. Due to withdrawal from the absence of the substance on The Island Judy was forced to join "Carrots Anonymous" with Doris and Bad Rose. They sampled Good Rose’s snowballs but weren’t exited about the taste. Yentl tried to give them some of her burnt fish, but they weren’t excited about that either. Wonder why? Anshel likes it this way.... so did Yentl´s father.

Dolly is hot and exhausted since her heavy clothing is unbearable in The Island heat. She continually cuts everyone's food and her business cards are littering the entire island.  Lastly, she's been trying to recruit Anshel to be her personal waiter at The Island’ Harmonia Gardens and get Good Fanny to choreograph some crazy dance for him. Anshel refuses to participate until the restaurant passes a strict kosher inspection.

Dr. Susan Lowenstein is pushing for group therapy of all the split personalities on The Island. The two Fannies, the two Roses, Anshel and Yentl and Daisy and Melinda. She is afraid of what might happen to them if one personality gets thrown off the island while the other one stays. Lowenstein has started sessions with Claudia trying to control her anger. Lowenstein is fascinated with Daisy, but doesn't want to hypnotize her until all the fruits and vegetables she is growing get ripe. The inhabitants are growing tired of Evil Fanny wasting the citrus fruit Daisy grows to rub on her knees and elbows… every night. Sensing the hostility she decided to teach a course, with Claudia, on self defense from male attackers with talcum powder. No one took the course. The last straw came when asked why she used so many fruits on her elbows and knees Evil Fanny answered sarcastically (for the billionth time), “You wanna know what it’s really like?”.

They answered with her in unison “fantasssssTIC”, then band together and voted Evil Fanny off The Island.
So Long Honey Lamb!

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