Rape?

Rape?
What is rape?
What is sexual battery?
Or assault?
What if I don’t want it,
But it happens anyway?
What if I never say yes,
But never say no?
Afraid of consent,
But afraid of resentment.
Today was the day,
I realized sex and love
Were not the same thing.
You arrive at my house,
And say,
That it is okay,
Because you love me.
And I think I love you too,
But deep inside,
I know this is not right.
I want to runaway,
But I don’t want you to stray.
And when you leave I cry.
When you leave I bleed
When I pee,
And it burns,
It hurts.
You left scratches on my arms,
But it was an accident.
I know you didn’t mean to cause any harm.
Because you love me.
And its okay cause one day we’ll be married.
Right?
Right?
You love me right?
I mean I know you flirt with other girls,
But you wouldn’t be shoving
Your dick in my mouth
If you didn’t love me.
Right?
Right?
That is what makes me different.
I’m not an object.
I am not an object.
But I can’t say rape,
Cause I never said no,
But I never said yes.
Sometimes I liked it,
Sometimes I wanted to cry.
But all I did was lay there.
God will punish me,
With these guilty feelings.
No, No, No,
I finally said it.
And you say,
Yes, Yes, Yes,
And I say,
No more.
I don’t want to do this anymore.
And you say fine that’s okay,
I never wanted this anyway.
And I think,
You mean I never had to do this,
I never had to do this?
But after that,
I was the same,
The same as every other gurl.
The same as every gurl
That you said ‘I love you’ to.
The same as every gurl
Whose hand you kissed.
The same as every gurl
You called your best friend.
The same as every other gurl.
So what was so special about me?
I don’t know what happened.
We didn’t make love,
We didn’t have sex.
It’s wasn’t rape.
It wasn’t assault,
Or battery.
What did you do to me?
What did you fucking do to me !!!!!!!!