Well...
At Kansas State it takes two. One to change the bulb and one more to explain how they did it every bit as well as any Big Ten or SEC school.
At Texas A&M it takes three. One to change the bulb, and two to phone a friend at Texas Tech and get instructions.
At Colorado it takes four. One to screw in the bulb, and three to figure out how to get high off the old one.
At Nebraska it takes five. One to change it, two to talk about how Tom Osborne would have done it, and two to throw the old bulb at Oklahoma students.
At Baylor it takes six. One to change it, two to mix the drinks, and three to find the perfect J. Crew outfit to wear for the occasion.
At OSU it takes seven, and each one gets credit for four semester hours for it.
At Kansas it takes eight. One to screw it in, and seven to discuss how much brighter it shines during basketball season.
At Oklahoma it takes ten. Two to figure out how to screw it in, two to buy a Sooners lamp, and six to phone a radio call-in show and talk about how John Blake is too stupid to do it. (Note: John Blake is no longer football coach at OU, check back in 3 years to see if the name Bob Stoops appears here!)
At Texas it takes fifteen. One to screw in the bulb, two to buy theSkoal, and twelve to shout, "HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!"
At Missouri it takes 100. One to change it, 49 to talk about how they do it better than KU, and 50 who realize it's all a lie.
At Iowa State it takes 80,000. One to screw it in, and 79,999 to discuss how this will finally be the year they have a good football team.
At Texas Tech it takes none. There is no electricity in Lubbock.
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