Teaching Without Hating

How can I teach about our history (esp. slavery) without engendering hate? What do you say to your child? Do you use an objective approach? And if you do, how do you do that without seeming to sugarcoat anything? Members say: Denise: Even before we began homeschooling, I made sure to expose them to films and books that represented the diversity of experience and accomplishment in the black community. We also spent a great deal of time discussing the positive aspects of our family history. As they got older, we studied the WWII and the Holocaust in great depth. Exploring the suffering of others seemed to increase their understanding of our history without lapsing into anger, hatred, and bitterness. They have struggled, however, with understanding how evil people can be to other people, regardless of skin color. Books about Appalachian Americans and books about the American Great Depression are good resources for showing the poverty and suffering of non-blacks. As a matter of fact, teaching the specific history of people of color requires a genereal discussion of class, economics, and politics. Depriving people of their right to vote, for example, puts them at a great disadvantage for wielding political power. The Irish were poor and despised when they emigrated to the US, but they were white! Therefore, they were able to move ahead through the power of the vote, while blacks were denied the vote. Comparisons like these help my twins see that we are not inherently defective, but have had many obstacles thrown in our path due to skin color prejudice. I think it also helps to remind them that they are standing on the shoulders of their ancestors and have every reason to hold their heads high. I'm not one for doing "crafty" things, so we watch piles of historical videos: documentaries, movies, etc. I glad we instilled a love of reading at an early age, because our kids spend many hours reading historical books of both fiction and nonfiction genres. Lynn: I think it is important to share your heartfelt feelings with your children. They, at age 13, should be able to understand your own bitterness and anger without internalizing it themselves. On the other hand, seeing how you actually feel about the black experience with Europeans, will help them decide how to feel about it. And to have feelings about it is essential. But it is important to give them the facts and when they ask you about your own feelings, say something like, "I feel sad, angry and embarrassed about slavery, and some of those feelings might not even make much sense. But that is the way I feel. How do you feel about what you have learned? Well, that is OK, too. But you will notice that I don't act out my anger on innocent people." I also make sure they know the facts about what has happened and is happening to us, and that my own feelings may be irrational, but that I, like everyone in the world, have a right to my feelings. I also tell them that our livelihood depends on getting along with our neighbors, regardless of their race, and that we all must behave in a socially acceptable manner to others. Also, though some people act on their negative feelings, we don't need the negative energy that engenders in our lives, so we don't act in ways that hurt others (their feelings or their bodies). I actually said to my son the other day, that while I have problems with the way white people in general behave to non-white peoples, the ones we choose to deal with don't behave that way. Cheryl: One thing I find easy to point out is how our ancestors' spirit wasn't broken. Yes, there was a lot of damage, and seemingly irreperable at that, but among other things, still they managed to teach themselves and each other to read, and were able to *create* joy for themselves, even under such incredibly dire circumstances. Centuries of unimaginable suffering ... it's a wonder that we're even able to achieve at all. Cdevanss: We were not the first people to be enslaved but that does not make it any less bitter. I will not shield my children from the world. I will try to let them have a healthy attitude about themselves, and to judge each person individually, not as a group. However, it is a part of our heritage to know our past, we cheat ourselves and our children when we keep it from them. We need to do like the Jews, about the holocaust, the Africans who pass down history, the Native-Americans and all other peoples who know who they are, and where they've been collectively. Slavery and bigotry are not nice, but they are reality. We did not cause slavery, we should not blame ourselves for slavery. But it is a very important part of our past. One we cannot escape, nor should we try. Embrace yourself, all of yourself, including the not so pleasant past. Antonia: I would suggest that you teach white supremacy, historical fact, Black people's place and status in modern day society and most importantly, teach what Ivan Van Sertima calls "A 500 Year Room." What Black people throughout the world are experiencing now has been only happening for a fraction of time when compared to human history (Dr. Clarke). Don't teach parts of history, but instead place the enslavement of African people on a historical timeline so that you can put your son in a position to "see" our way out of this. In my opinion this is how you can teach him where we are today, where we've come from, and the possibilities of where we can be without animosity towards white people. Another added approach is to definitely teach about differing worldviews (western/white; African/Black, asian, indigenous American, etc.) and what happens when people who have an African epistemology meet up with people who do not. It will help him view white people not as evil (which I refrain from commenting on because of the postcard that I am sending), but as different, and possibly toxic to Black people. So about the books that I think would help out. For him: Segu-Conde, Things Fall Apart-Achebe, Nile Valley Contributions to Civilizations-Browder, to name a few. And for you: The African Personality In America-Kambon, Notes on an African World Revolution-Clarke, and Yurgu-Ani. [..] I feel that our role is to put our feelings aside and teach children who can comprehend white supremacy without letting their feelings get in the way. It is our only hope. Wendi: I may have to take a historical look at the whole institution of slavery and oppression to show that although the form of slavery in America was unique, the idea is not. Someone mentioned looking in the bible at slavery. Here is a link to passages from the bible. Put in a word i.e. slavery and every passage in the bible that mentions slavery will come up. http://bible.gospelcom.net/bible? Great for searching bible passages/words Looking at the historical forms of slavery in various parts of the world is a good idea. Looking at the reasons why people chose to enslave other others (i.e. war, money, etc…) is a good idea. Looking at the oppression of various groups because of race, sex, class, religion, or nationality is a good idea and in that regard looking at brainwashing techniques used in war (i.e. Vietnam) and some religions may also help. I think that the brainwashing of American citizens and the oppression of Blacks may be my biggest challenge because when physical slavery ended Jim Crowism followed by institutionalized racism began. Moroskistamps (nonBlack mother): Teach African history from the very beginning and as they develop the knowledge and pride they will look at what the Europeans did throughout history and actually take pity on them .My children think it is sad that the Europeans hearts were/ are so filled with hatred and greed. What kind of spirtual life is that?