Life is sexually transmitted...
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks...
Some people are like slinkies... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs...
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again...
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism...
In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the wold is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal...
Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a close resemblance to the first...