Stupid People
He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.
This young lady has delusions of adequacy.
Bright as Alaska in December.
Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
Has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it.
If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate.
If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
When she opens her mouth, it's to change whichever foot was previously in there.
One-celled organisms out score him in IQ tests.
Donated his brain to science before he was done using it.
Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.
It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.
Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled.
Dumb Questions
Should Vegetarians eat animal crackers?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?
Do you find it a bit unnerving doctors call what they do "practice"?
How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America?
If a funeral procession is at night, do you drive with your lights off?
Are there female leprechauns?
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Why is there an L in NOEL?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
If we had a woman president, would her husband be the "first man"?
If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
When you put 'THE' and 'IRS' together, it forms 'THEIRS'. Coincidence? I think not?
When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?
How come there are not any B batteries?
Why is abbreviation such a long word??
If you don't pay your exorcist, do you get repossessed?
If you mated a bull dog and a shitsu, would it be called a bullshit?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
Why do they stuff so much junk mail in credit card bills?
Why are you IN a movie, but your ON TV?
Why is dessert always the first thing in so many cafeteria buffet lines?
Why does the news media use Vice President Albert O. Gore Jr.'s middle
initial? Are there so many Al Gores that we can not keep track of them all?
Where do they get the seeds to grow seedless oranges?
Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?
Why is it when we ask for the check in a restaurant they bring us a bill?
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
When lightning strikes the ocean why don't all the fish die?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
Know any more stupid questions?? Not that I need lots of help being dumb, but mmmm.... I like to laugh!
HoneyHoney's Country Girl Hullaballoo
http://www.oocities.org/bornhoney/