Things You Don't Want to Hear During Surgery:

• Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.
• Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop.
• Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?
• Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie.
• Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
• Rats, there go the lights again...
• Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Heck, the guy's got two of 'em.
• Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
• Could you stop that thing from beating? It's throwing my concentration off!
• What's this doing here?
• That's cool! now can you make his leg twitch?!
• I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.
• Well, folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.
• Sterile, shcmeril. The floor's clean, right?
• Anyone see where I left that scalpel?
• OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.
• Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
• Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.
• She's gonna blow! Everyone take cover!!!
• Rats! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
• FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!

****************************** Back to E-Mail Humor
Next