HOME ARCHIVES		ANOTHER CREAM OF PASSION   To please pie pedants I'll acknowledge that in 1969 Belgian anarchist Noel Godin planted one in the uptight mug of French novelist Marguerite Duras. This is seen by many as the seminal toss. However, for a more overtly political pie splat, we had to wait one more year.   Tom Forcade was the founder of the bucket-bong periodical High Times, still on sale to this day. In May, 1970, he was testifying before a US Senate Commission on obscenity and Pornography. After summing up the various strands of his thesis with 'f--- off and f--- censorship", he smacked one of the members of the Commission in the kisser with a creamy one.   And they've been flying fluffy and fast ever since. In fact, publishing friends of Forcade seemed to treat the 1970s as one, big, Three Stooges pie fight. Keeping in mind that Hippies and Yippies past (for example: "Grateful Dead are good") Forcades' pals claim the scalps of guru leader Maharaj ji, tax-lobbyist Howard Jarvis, Rolling Stone publisher Jann Wenner and, curiously, Star Trek's William Shatner.   These pie-oneers may have broken down the walls, but fate chose Aron Kay as the Right Place Right Time guy, who would capture the American public's imagination. William F. Buckley, the much-loathed founder of the arch-conservative National Review magazine, was speaking at New York University. Aron Kay threw a pie which landed on his head. People began referring to him as "The Pieman".   Buoyed by the infamy, Kay went on to sticky the heads of many. He lists as his hits a San Francisco police supervisor, a former New York mayor, a Watergate associate of Richard Nixon,a couple of conserva-tive lobbyists and the odd politician.   Meanwhile, back in Europe, Noel Godin was continuing his campaign. He also became know as "The Pieman", except in a French accent. However, "Le Pieman" wasn't trying to smash the state, just prick the bubble of pretension. Arthouse director Jean-Luc Godard. Splat! Philosopher Bernard-Henri Levy. Bam! Choreographer Maurice Bejart. Pif! Like some sort of psycho-yobbo at a arthouse festival, Godin went after anything in a beret.   Now in his mid 50s, Godin never really stopped. He even claims credit for organising the 1998 pieing of Gates. Which brings us to the modern-day splatter-fest.   Recent bigwigs who've had to have their suits dry-cleaned include econ-omist Milton Friedman and Robert Shapiro, CEO of Monsanto, the genetically modified seed company. A number of these modern-day Lee Harvey Oswalds, sitting up in their book depositories, creamy cakes in hand, work under the banner of the Biotic Baking Brigade. Just this year various chapters list hits: the Canadian feder Minister for Health, the United States Agriculture Secretary, the managing director of the IMF, the governor of Illinois, a former Californian mayor, the director of biotechnology at the University of California and the bolke who created Dolly the sheep.   This new pie war seems to be riding the same wave as other sorts of culture-jamming - like parodies of multinational websites - which attempt to put new variations on Yippie-style stunts.   Yet with the pie, the message can be lost in the souffle-medium. In November 1998, three activists planted a puffy one ssquare in the dial of San Francisco mayor Willie Brown. They splattered him to protest at the city's homeless policies. Alas, because Brown was black and the pie was was pale the act was misinterpreted as a rascist attack. One of the Cherry Pie Three snapped her collarbone in the scuffle, and all were found guilty of battery.   So what of the Bracks splat? I guess pie throwers have to keep in mind that the five second won't come with historical footnotes. And there's something annoyingly French and high-farce about cream pies that may get lost lost in the translation to Australia.   But why listen to me? I'm the guy who was in court last year for sending a remote-control, fag-puffing seagull out to Warney at the MCG, so I'm hardly arbitrator of good sense. John Safran - The Age 24/10/00