HOME GERRY		THE MYSTERIOUS PHONE CALL By Cousin Gerry 'Twas late at night, the sky was dark, the birds had ceased to sing; I'd just got snuggled up in bed when the phone began to ring. I stormed out to the loungeroom and I asked with voice so dour, "What sort of friend would call a man at this ungodly hour?" I grabbed the phone to answer it. I said "Hello?" then frowned, For I did not get an answer, just a strange familiar sound: The sound of trousers ruffling, then the sound of unzipped fly Then the sound of urination as a man let out a sigh. It dripped and dropped and bubbled as I stood there all alone I realised what had happened and I cursed the mobile phone. A man may go and take a leak, but this is what appalled me: In doing so, this man had knocked his mobile phone and called me. And then I heard him talking to a woman, not too far; Obviously this was a man who leaves the door ajar. I listened very carefully to recognise the voices, So I could yell out his name and be heard among the noises. Before too long, I recognised the voices I was hearin': My friend and colleague Dave O'Neil and his life-partner Kiran! I think, just then, he realised what had happened - well, at least, I heard a rustle, then a grunt, and then transmission ceased. So it's a moral for you mobile users with which my poem ends: Be careful with your buttons so you don't gross out your friends!