An injured seagull taken in by Helen Walters, 40, scoffed her two pet goldfish when she popped out at Northam, Devon.
Granny Nancy Grant, 86, had a flower-decked zimmer frame when she was a bridesmaid for the first time at a wedding in Neath, South Wales.
Bargain hunter Neil Morley, 37, slept outside a shop to get a DVD Player and returned home to find his TV stolen in Hastings.
"I don't give a toss what the media thinks", fumed Trevor Francis recently. It must be a different Francis who has a lucrative sideline as a Sky TV analyst.
A new plaque on a rail platform at Widnes, Cheshire, marks the spot where Paul Simon wrote 60's hit Homeward Bound.
Villager Bert Betts has had an M27 slip road named after him at Bursledon, near Southampton.
The average man grows 26ft of hair on his head over the course of his life say researchers in Canada who are studying baldness.
Thomas and Elizabeth Whitehead will celebrate their 65th wedding anniversary by staying in the same room in a hotel in Cyprus for the 36th time.
Janet Thrope, aged 106, and pals at an old folks' home are knitting a scarf ONE MILE long to raise charity cash in Swinton, South Yorks.
Frigid chimpanzees are being shown videos of love-making by other monkeys to get them in the mood at a zoo in Valencia, Spain.
Wacky Fred Pearson, 36, of Harrogate has more than 700 toys from Kinder Surprise chocolate eggs, and values his collection at £2,000.
May 2001:
NEWS
Riding fan Zara Phillips, 19, posed on a mechanical horse at the London launch of a project to attract young riders
3-2-1 TV legend Ted Rogers has  died          of a heart attack aged 65.
A former 19th century brothel in York has been converted into a restaurant - decorated with black and white pictures of the 'working girls'.
Villagers of Messing, Essex - home of George W.Bush's ancestors - invited him to be their president for a day.
A man is fighting a drink-drive rap in Arkansas, USA, on the grounds that his vehicle did not have a motor - because it was a horse.
'FIT and HEALTHY' dwarfs are wanted for the world dwarf throwing championships, back in England for the first time since causing uproar in 1986.
         MOBY                     BARTHEZ
A middle-aged motorist was twice the drink-drive limit after scoffing 42 liqueur chocolates. He got a three-year ban at Wennigsen, Germany.
Scalextric nut Mark Scale, 38, and 20 of his pals built the world's longest toy race circuit in Manchester's Trafford Centre - at 2,550 FEET
The skeleton of a man hanged for murder in the 19th century was dug up by builders fixing drains at Taunton police station, Somerset.
Traffic warden John Power, 49, is riding from Land's End to John O'Groats on a jet-ski.
A man who caught rabies from a dog-bite in the Phillipines has died at London's University College Hospital.
Grandad Ralph Morgan scrapped a bungee jump on his 65th birthday after spraining his ankle falling off a skateboard.
Wesley Snipes was held by customs when he flew into Prague for new movie Blade 2 - he had 200 pairs of Y-fronts in his luggage.
An 18-year-old student killed himself and injured six college pals when a hand grenade exploded as he juggled with it at a party in Vidovci, Croatia.
John Prescott was caught on camera throwing a vicious rabbit punch into the jaw of an egg-lobbing street thug.
Gran Jean Hudson, 84, was knocked out by a wedding cake when a table collapsed during her grand-daughter's big day at East Grinstead, East Sussex.
Salesman Leo Pusa, 38, has claimed a new world sauna-sitting record after enduring 12 minutes 6 seconds at 120 degrees in Finland.