Part 5
Reluctantly, you begin to withdraw your awareness.
[I'm sorry, Stephen. I'm just too tired. I'm scared I might do something wrong.]
Stephen touches your mind briefly before nodding.
[That's very wise of you, Jay. I have been pushing you a bit too hard today.]
You wander around the room, studying the padding on the walls, as Stephen checks telekinetically to make sure that the serving machine is correctly deactivated. Stephen has bounced you off these walls several times today and yet you feel no bruises. Whatever the material is it has to be a better shock absorber than anything on Earth.
"What do you suppose these things are made of?" You call, poking the wall. Your loud voice is startling after the silence of mental communication. Even with the padding absorbing the sound it cracks through the air like a whip. You see Stephen jump and beside him the machine emits a quiet clicking noise. In slow motion you see the expression on Stephen's face change from surprise to panic.
You don't hear the machine fire. You do feel the crushing impact as the ball, traveling at a little over a hundred miles an hour, strikes you in the chest.
You feel your breastbone shatter as the fire of pain ignites in your chest cavity. The sharp stabs you feel as two shards of bone are forced into your heart are just highlights against a psychedelic background of agony.
And then numbness spreads in a wave behind the pain and, as it reaches your mind, you welcome it and sink into the inviting darkness.
*****
[Hold on! Jay, hold on! Help is coming. You have to stay with me, Jay! Hold on!]
*****
You wake in a dimly lit room, only vaguely aware that you never expected to wake at all. There is a vaguely clinical smell around you that reminds you of a hospital and you realise that you must be in what passes for a medical centre up here.
Memory returns with a rush and your hand moves of its own accord, getting halfway to your chest before you stop it. You're alive beyond any of your expectations. That is evidence enough that your ravaged chest has been restored.
Your eyes become accustomed to the gloom as you begin to look around at the pristine white room in which you have been placed. The first thing you see is Stephen. The tall young man is slumped in the chair beside your bed, his long dark-blonde hair hanging across his face. Despite that you can see that he looks pale and haggard, his eyes deeply shadowed with exhaustion. You reach out a hand as if to wake him.
"No, let him sleep." John's voice startles you into full wakefulness. The dark haired man is standing in the doorway and his voice is gentle. "I don't think he's slept in days."
"Days?" You ask weakly. John nods and comes into the room so you no longer have to squint against the bright lights behind him.
"He blames himself for your accident." John tells you. "Which, incidentally, was two days ago." He looks at you with worry in his dark eyes. "We've been calling to you, trying to revive you ever since. Stephen was able to keep you alive and the doctors here repaired you physically but for a telepath that is only part of the process." He smiles a tired smile. "Rather typical of you, Jay, to wake yourself up in the middle of the night when no one was calling."
"What are you doing up here, John?" You ask, still confused.
"You think I wouldn't come when I heard you were so badly hurt? Stephen called me almost immediately."
You don't know quite how to answer that so you settle for the simple:
"Thank you."
John gives you a mock bow although his eyes are still scanning you anxiously.
"You are quite welcome. We ought to let you sleep and recover your strength but there's something we ought to do first." He reaches forward and touches Stephen's shoulder. The younger man shifts awkwardly but then his eyes flutter open.
"John?" The name is on his lips before the eyes open and he looks up at his older friend as if in desperate need of reassurance.
"I think there's someone here who wants to say hello." John says quietly. Still tired and confused you nod anyway.
"Hello, Stephen."
Stephen's eyes swivel to face you and you can see the relief as it pours into them. Then his eyes go blank and John catches him by the shoulders to prevent him falling forward.
"I've put him back to sleep but he'll rest more easily now." John tells you. "Sleep, Jay, and remember we'll be here when you call."
*****
The next few days pass in something of a blur. You spend most of them asleep, recovering your strength and letting your body build up its energy reserves. After the first day you are moved back into the Earth Ambassador's quarters, John jaunting you with a mental touch so light you barely feel it. Even so they keep your bedroom door open and there is always someone there listening for you, sometimes Stephen or Mike, sometimes John or Carol, sometimes even Tyso in the few days he spends on the Trig before going away again.
The presence of the others is a constant reminder of how much they care for you, and a constant reminder of how wrong your initial distrust of them and your new situation was. Even so, in the hours you are able to stay awake between dozing, you find yourself thinking about life as a Tomorrow Person and all it entails.
What terrifies you is the fact that although the others were frantic with worry and shocked at your accident, there is a sense of familiarity with the situation in all their minds. Somewhere deep inside the fact that you were nearly killed doesn't surprise them. What could their lives be like that the prospect of mortal danger seems natural?
That thought is still troubling you when Stephen comes in to talk to you at the end of the third day. The young man's eyes are deeply shadowed and you know that he has been disturbed by nightmares. His hair hangs around his face loosely and slightly unkempt. Stephen wont meet your eyes as he sits by your bedside.
"Jay." He begins, his voice hoarse, "I just want to say again how sorry I am."
You don't even hesitate. You haven't at any point blamed Stephen for the accident, and besides, even if you did blame him he's been punishing himself enough
"Stephen, it's okay. I'm alright and it wasn't your fault anyway. Sometimes these things just happen, I know that. I should be thanking you for saving my life."
He looks up startled.
"But it was my fault you were hurt in the first place! I've been a Tomorrow Person for years - I should have spotted how tired you were earlier! And I should have known better than to be fiddling with alien equipment like that. You were my responsibility and I failed you."
You meet his eyes, challenging.
"I'm old enough to make my own decisions, Stephen!" You tell him firmly and a little indignantly. "And I should have stopped earlier anyway. Is an overactive guilt complex a Tomorrow Person thing? As far as I'm concerned I owe you my life. Even if you want to be responsible for the accident I'd say we're just about even."
Stephen hesitates and then lowers his gaze once again. You're probably not going to be able to convince him of anything just yet. When he goes on his voice is low and grave.
"I expect you want to go back to Earth with John."
This time there is a pause before you can frame an answer. You've been thinking a lot of your life back on Earth these last few days and you can't help being worried by these Tomorrow People and the way they deal with danger. Stephen goes on before you can think of anything to say, still in sombre tones.
"Jay, John thinks you might turn your back on your gifts after this and try to have nothing to do with us and what we do. Jay, you can't do that! You can't abandon the wonderful gifts you've been given because I was a careless idiot. You have an opportunity to change the world and, believe me, it can be fun too. Don't leave us, Jay."
Now you're startled into speechlessness. Give up using the powers you've just started to appreciate? You remember the indescribable feeling of looking at a mechanism from the inside. You think of all the times you've used your telepathy and telekinesis to make your life just that little bit easier in the last few days. Can you imagine choosing to give that up?
"Is that possible? Just to walk away?"
Stephen looks up at your faces and realises now that he's put the thought in your head that wasn't there before.
"You'll always be a telepath." He tells you. "You'll always be able to use your abilities and you'll always have the responsibilities that go with them. Whether you choose to accept those responsibilities.... Well, Jay, that's up to you. No one knows your face yet, no one knows you're one of us. But you are one of us and if anyone ever learns your secret then you will be in danger for the rest of your life. And, if you choose to do this, you'll be alone - more alone than you could possibly imagine."
You see memories passing through Stephen's mind, memories of those occasions when he lost his special abilities. And then you realise that you were watching his memories instinctively with your telepathy and you shudder at the thought of no longer doing that.
If you choose not to be a Tomorrow Person then you'll have to shut your mind to all these things. There can be no half measures - you can see that. But there is so much about your old life you don't want to lose! You have two parents who love you. You have friends, you do well at school. You know that if you choose to live life as a tomorrow person all that will fall away. But so many more avenues will open to you.
"You don't have to decide now." Stephen tells you hurriedly, somewhat alarmed by your thoughtful silence. "Jay, you know you're welcome to stay here, or to take sometime to think about it back on Earth if you like."
You nod and he leaves, a little unnerved by the uncertainty in your thoughts.
You think about it for a while after he leaves. You remember the fantastic day you had before the accident. You remember how wary you were of this whole business at first. You're still thinking when you fall asleep again but you know that when you wake up you're going to have to make a decision.
Do you:
a) Stay on the Trig with the others?
b) Return to Earth while you think about it?
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