Title:
Life's a journey!Rating:
NC-17Disclaimer:
I don't own them...I wish I did, that way I could have certain male members at my constant disposal *winks at TXD, Mandy and Jo*Authors note:
Well I asked for a challenge a few days ago and received a few from several individuals and I thank you for your ideas. I decided I would go with Kate F's. "Kate (Mulgrew) said that she (Kathryn) did fancy him (Chakotay)!" So here it is...I hope it's up to scratch. I haven't done this in a while. The very beginning is Kathryn's private thoughts. (*SOME REFERENCE TO ENDGAME* ABSOLUTELY NO C/7, EVER IN THIS FIC!!!)Summary: Kathryn and B'Elanna get to do some talking, which in turn leads up to an intimate moment with Chakotay and disappointment for Seven
I stand in the loneliness of my quarters, facing the spinning planet that has taken me...no...us seven years to reach. It's been a long seven years. Would I change any of it? I can quite honestly say 'No!' I have experienced so much, made friendships with so many unique individuals, that I wouldn't have traded it in for anything. Yes, we've lost vital members of our *family* and we've gained new ones too. But that's what happens when you're tossed 70,000 light years away from everything you've ever known.
I have to say I regret some of my actions, I regret a lot of my actions, be it professional or personal, but I've dealt with what life has thrown at me for as long as I can remember. However, never did I imagine that they would throw him at me with such a force that I don't know how to deal with it and I've ended up not dealing with it for the past seven years.
Kathryn turned from the window and sat down on the sofa, glancing round what had been her home, her solitude on this soon to be over journey.
Kathryn's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of her door chime."Come in" she called.
The door opened to reveal B'Elanna, holding a small precious bundle. Kathryn jumped up.
"B'Elanna...I didn't realise the Doctor had released you." Kathryn walked over to her "May I?" Indicating her daughter.
"Certainly" B'Elanna handed the baby over to her Captain who then moved over to the sofa once again. B'Elanna followed, sitting at the opposite end facing the door.
"The Doctor didn't really have much choice."
Kathryn looked at her with a knowing look on her face "Oh?"
"I was going mad being cooped up in there with him...plus I wanted my daughter to meet the woman who got her crew home"
"Oh B'Elanna...we got us home"
"Well yes, but having you as our Captain helped a lot."
"That's kind of you to say, I have had my moments of weakness though..."
"Who hasn't" B'Elanna interjected.
Kathryn smiled and looked down in her arms to the small bundle that B'Elanna had brought into the world only a few hours beforehand.
"I would have liked children" Kathryn spoke while rubbing her finger across the baby's head. Kathryn handed B'Elanna back the baby, both leaving Kathryn's statement up in the air.
Kathryn watched as the child snuggled against her mother, before she moved so she could watch the stars again. B'Elanna looked up, feeling a twinge of guilt at having the opportunity to love and be loved.
B'Elanna was about to get up and leave when Kathryn turned to face her."I just realised something"
"What?" B'Elanna asked, looking down at her sleeping daughter.
"Before you arrived I'd been sitting here pondering over the last seven years and I thought 'that's it we've done what we promised each other we'd do, our journey is finally over'. Yet I sit here watching you with your daughter..." Kathryn smiled at the picture before her "and I realise our journey isn't over until we say it's over."
"You sound like you're describing life"
"Maybe I am, and I don't know about you but I've still got a few years left in me yet!" They laughed quietly as not to disturb the sleeping child. "I sometimes wish I'd taken other paths..." B'Elanna watched her Captain as her face took on a distant expression.
"Can I ask you a question?" B'Elanna put to her.
"Sure"
"A personal question."
Kathryn smirked "Fire away"
"Do you fancy him?"
"How did I know that one was coming?"
"Oh I don't know...maybe you just got to know me too well." B'Elanna smiled.
Kathryn smiled "Do I fancy him? Hmm...I assume we're talking about Chakotay here?" B'Elanna nodded
"Then my answer would have to be 'Oh Yeah!'" B'Elanna laughed at her response.
"That tattoo has the ability to turn me on at the most inopportune moments"B'Elanna began to laugh harder, disturbing the baby slightly.
"Really?""Yeah, really. Since I've met Chakotay..." Kathryn lowered her voice to a whisper and moved forward slightly. "I've had the most erotic dreams...so much so that I have, on many occasions, woken up in an orgasm frenzy."
B'Elanna sat there trying to hide obvious shock behind a huge grin.
"I've shocked you haven't I?" Kathryn asked, sitting up a little.
B'Elanna mentally shook herself. "You haven't shocked me as such, I'm just surprised"
"It's been a sexually frustrating seven years B'Elanna." Kathryn spoke seriously, before they both began laughing hysterically, awakening the baby completely.
"I suppose it has," B'Elanna said trying to calm herself and the baby. "...but that isn't what I meant"
Kathryn gave her a confused look "It wasn't?"
B'Elanna shook her head "No, it's just...you're not usually this open, with me anyway" the latter as an afterthought
Kathryn gave a sad nod "That's one of those paths I was referring to earlier B'Elanna"
"Maybe you could take that path now?" B'Elanna put to her
Kathryn smiled "Maybe I will, maybe I will."
"Good. So when did you realise you *liked* him?" B'Elanna asked, changing back to the original subject.
Kathryn stuck her tongue into her cheek, debating whether to answer the question honestly.
B'Elanna sat waiting patiently.
"When I read your files...before I ever set foot on Voyager."
"You're kidding me!"
"No"
"Before you'd even met him?
"Yes. I will say my interest in him has intensified somewhat, over the years..."
"I gathered that from those erotic dreams"
They began laughing once again. Kathryn felt such joy in talking like this. She'd missed having female companions over the last seven years, but was pleased that B'Elanna was allowing her to experience it now, rather than not at all.
"Do you love him?" B'Elanna turned serious.
They stared at each other for what seemed like an age.
"I..." Kathryn swallowed "...yeah. Yes I do love Chakotay"
B'Elanna looked up as the doors opened. Kathryn turned to her door, to find a somewhat shocked Chakotay standing in the doorway.
Kathryn turned back to B'Elanna, closed her eyes and shook her head. "Oh. My. God!"
Chakotay stepped into the room allowing the door to close behind him.
B'Elanna watched him blink a few times, before he began to speak.
"You're...you're in love with me?"
Kathryn sat there in silence for a few minutes, with her eyes closed, wishing the floor to open up and swallow her. She wasn't surprised when it didn't.When she opened her eyes B'Elanna was getting up to leave.
"You're leaving already?" Kathryn asked, pleading with her eyes for B'Elanna to stay."Uhm...yeah...I need to go find Tom and...uhm discuss something with him. Plus I think you two need to talk." B'Elanna made her way past Chakotay, carrying the baby with her. She nodded to Chakotay on her way out.
"I'll talk to you later Captain" she said before heading out the door to find Tom.
Kathryn closed her eyes again only to open them when she felt the sofa go down on the other side.
"So...Kathryn..."
"Chakotay"
"Kathryn"
"Chakotay"
"I think we know each others names Kathryn." Kathryn gave a nervous laugh and looked at him as if pleading with him not to discuss this...it didn't work.
"So Kathryn...you love me" it was a statement not a question
"Well you see Chakotay...what you heard..." he nodded "was taken out of context. I love you, like I love B'Elanna and Tom, Tuvok even." Kathryn nervously told him, hoping he would believe her.
He did believe her."You love me" he repeated and edged closer to her. Kathryn sighed and rubbed her forehead.
"What if I do Chakotay? Its not like we could do anything about it now, is it?"
"Why not?" he asked, moving closer again.
She began to notice his movement in her direction.
"I do believe you've been seeing Seven."
"I could change that" his hand brushed her leg.
"You would give her up for me?"
"Yes" it was that simple to him
"Why?"
"Because I love you, like I've never loved a woman in my entire life."
"You don't mean that Chakotay." her heart was beating fast and hard now.
"I do...I would do anything for you Kathryn, like I've done for the past seven years. I don't make bathtubs for every woman I meet you know" he smiled at her and his dimples came out in force.
'Oh my god...not those' she thought
"I'm finding it difficult to breathe" she began to use her hand as a fan.
"Here let me help you" He brought his hand to her chin, tilted her head ever so gently and brought his lips to hers.
Kathryn closed her eyes, allowing the sensations to run through her body. His kiss was gentle at first, slowly becoming more passionate...and then she pulled away.
Kathryn looked at him. She was sure her heart was going to jump out of her chest any minute now.
"You...uhm...you..." she was breathing heavily and he was watching her "shouldn't, you...Seven...wrong..." she watched him, saw the love in his eyes and she made her decision. "...You should continue..." his face began to fall "...to kiss me..." She moved forward pulling him to her, so much so that she fell back on the sofa bringing him with her.
There kisses where more heated and passionate.
As Chakotay lay there kissing Kathryn all he could think about was how he had only been expecting dinner.
When they broke away from one another once again, both were breathing heavily, silently watching the other.
Kathryn was sure her heart could be heard beating from the other end of the ship. Thoughts were racing through her head, images of what they could do next, aroused her so much that she pulled him down to her lips.
Chakotay once again began kissing her passionately, opening her mouth with his tongue, tasting her. He always imagined her to taste like coffee, and she did, yet she was sweeter and tastier than your ordinary cup of coffee.
Kathryn's hands were on his neck and in his hair. He began moving from her lips, round her face, down to her neck. When he kissed and suckled on her neck just below her ear, it was almost her undoing.
"Oh god Chakotay" she groaned.
Between kisses, Chakotay spoke of his love for her and how her beauty aroused him.
While he spoke these words, Kathryn's eyes began to well with unshed tears. How long had she wished to hear these words from this man, not disguised as a story? How long had she wanted to rip of his clothes and make mad passionate love to him? Far too bloody long was her answer!
She loved him, she wanted him, she needed him. At one time Tuvok had been her constant, her conscience, her sounding board. But that had soon become Chakotay's role and her love for him was an additional bonus.
As he began to undress her, she began to think of Seven, her crew, Earth and her family.
"Stop" she spoke quietly, not really wanting him to. He continued.
"Don't Chakotay" this time her voice was firmer and she pushed him back slightly, enough to get his attention.
He climbed off her and sat on the sofa, looking and feeling confused.
"Kathryn?"
Kathryn sat up, running her hands over her face and through her hair.
"Chakotay..." she began.
"I don't understand Kathryn...I love you, you love me, I know you're aroused, I know I'm aroused" indicating his trousers.
She hid her amusement, before turning serious again. "Yes, I love you, yes I am seriously aroused..." she looked once again at his obvious arousal and groaned, why was she stopping this. It was what she wanted, he was what she wanted, yet once again her head won out over her heart.
"Yes, we're in the Alpha Quadrant, we've managed to get our crew home, but I feel we're betraying someone, we're betraying her feelings towards you"
Chakotay sighed, trying to compose himself.
"I'll speak to her..." Kathryn tilted her head slightly.
"I promise" Kathryn nodded her head "Go on then"
"Now?"
"Yes"
"But Kathryn..."
"But nothing, there is no way you are getting into my pants until you tell Seven that you and her are over" Smirking, but serious.
They stared at each other before Chakotay began to chuckle "You're so lady-like Kathryn" he said sarcastically.
"I have my moments...and as much as these pants want you right now, you need to talk to Seven."
"I'll go talk to Seven" Chakotay stood up, moved over to Kathryn, kissed her and moved towards the door.
"You go talk to Seven and when you get back...I'll be waiting" Kathryn smiled seductively.
"I'll go talk to her now and be back very very soon" she watched as Chakotay left her quarters in search of Seven.
-------------------
Chakotay strode purposely towards Astrometrics, he was going to tell Seven it was over. Kathryn had basically told him she was his. He had waited seven years for this and there was no way he was going to lose her now.
The doors to Astrometrics opened instantly as he approached. She stood before him, dressed in her silver catsuit at the surrounding console. He borgified hand moved efficiently. She seemed so cold and detached. Why did he think he could 'copulate' with her? Yes, he had been spending far too much time with her, but that was all about to change.
He moved up beside her "Seven" Yes he'd be civil.
"Commander" she smiled in a false sexual way.
Chakotay spotted the mirror and the Doctor's dating tips on the padd beside her, she had been reading lesson sixty-nine 'Tempting your conquest with appealing and successful facial expressions.
Yes it was definitely better to end this now.
"Seven, I can't see you any longer."
Seven's eyebrow arched "Is your visual acuity impaired Commander..." her hand moved to tap her commbadge "...do you require medical assistance?"
Chakotay stopped her "No Seven, my visual acuity is fine." he paused thinking of the best way to phrase it all...there wasn't one.
"I don't love you Seven and I can't be with you."
Chakotay watched as Seven took on the information, assimilated it, then spoke.
"But I thought...""No Seven..." his patience was running out. Kathryn was waiting for him and all Seven could do was drag out the inevitable. What had he been thinking? There was no chance in the Delta Quadrant that it would have worked.
Seven continued to watch him, trying to read his expression, it then dawned on her.
"She has finally given herself to you." her eyes were colder than they had been when he first entered Astrometrics."Yes and I love her, not you..."
"...as you have done for the last seven years." she finished for him. He nodded in response.
Seven turned back to her console, manoeuvring her hand efficiently. Her stance was clear, but only because he had been spending time with her recently, she was hurt. He felt genuinely sorry, but he loved Kathryn far too much to lose her.
With out saying another word he moved away from her, only for her to stop him. She swung him round to face her, he was obviously surprised. She watched as his eyes went wide, before she forced her lips to his.
Chakotay didn't struggle at first, he was too shocked that he just stood there allowing Seven to 'suck face', literally, as Tom had once said.
Chakotay grabbed her by the shoulders and pushed her back.
"What did you do that for?" he was angry and frustrated. He had tried being nice to her, but she just didn't seem to get that there was nothing between them and there never would be. Her voice was as stoic as Tuvok's when she responded.
"There was a remote possibility that..."
"You make me sound like the computer. You kissing me doesn't change anything. You don't light the fire in my belly and you don't arouse me so much that I want to take you right where you stand. You..." he emphasised "...do not do anything for me."
"And the Captain does?" she retorted angrily.
"Spirits yes! She always has and she always will." he responded harshly, before he turned and left Astrometrics, leaving Seven to continue with her work.
She quickly and efficiently wiped the lone tear that rolled down her face before moving to the adjacent console.
-------------------
Chakotay walked slowly back to Kathryn's quarters. He was angry and needed to calm down. He hadn't meant to hurt Seven, but he had. Hopefully, later on, he'd be able to talk to her and they would remain friends. He wasn't sure how ending his intimate relationship with Seven because of Kathryn would affect their relationship. But Seven obviously saw how himself and Kathryn loved and felt about one another.
Chakotay slowed down as he came to Kathryn's quarters, thoughts racing though his mind. Had she changed her mind while he had been away? Well he'd soon find out.
Chakotay pressed the chime, awaiting her response to allow him to enter. He hadn't done this earlier as he had wanted to surprise her. Boy did she get a surprise...boy did he get a surprise.
When she didn't answer the door at the first chime, he tried again. It was then that he heard her faint call of 'Come in'.
The door opened and Chakotay was basked in candlelight. This certainly answered his previous question...unless she was expecting someone else. Kathryn had certainly been busy while he'd been away. The whole of her quarters were lit up with candles. However, Kathryn was no where to be seen.
"Kathryn?"
"I'm in here Chakotay and I'm feeling nibblish" her voice floated seductively from the bedroom. Chakotay's eyebrows raised in Tuvok like fashion.
Chakotay moved over to the replicator, punched in a few commands, then picked up the replicated dish, before moving into the bedroom.
When Chakotay entered, he found Kathryn lounging on the bed dressed in only her birthday suit.
Chakotay gasped at her beauty...he then began finding it very difficult to breathe. Kathryn jumped up from her position on the bed and moved over to him when she saw him in difficulty.
"Here sit down..." she held his arm, taking the dish from him and moved him over to the bed. "...I was trying to surprise you not kill you. Put your head between you knees and breathe deeply and carefully." Chakotay did as asked, while Kathryn moved to get him a glass of water.
When he sat back up, he took the glass from her, sipped it then took another look at her.
"Wow" it was all he could manage at this point. She looked amazing, stunning in fact. Her skin was pale, yet deliciously creamy. Her breasts were pert and her nipples erect from the cool air. As his gaze travelled south he took in another breath.
"I was kinda hoping for that reaction earlier on" she chuckled.
Chakotay looked into her eyes.
"I wasn't expecting...this" he emphasised with his hands.
"Like I said, I wanted to surprise you"
"You're doing a lot of that today" he said taking another sip of water, his mouth was extremely dry.
Kathryn looked over at the dish Chakotay had brought with him, which she had placed on the bedside table.
"Ice-cream?" she questioned.
"You said you were nibblish, so I replicated coffee ice cream for you"
Kathryn responded with one of her deep throaty laughs. "I was thinking of you Chakotay. I was hoping you could fill a little hole I have" she smirked.
"Oh really?" he gave her a full dimpled grin.
"Really" Kathryn picked up his right hand and placed in on her left shoulder.
"Touch me Chakotay...touch me like you've always wanted to." his hand glided down her chest, moving to the valley between her breasts, stroking the inside of both breasts. Kathryn closed her eyes and moaned, 'finally' she thought.
His hand cupped her left breast, rubbing his thumb over her nipple. She pushed her breast into his hand. He then moved his left hand onto her right breast, mimicking hat his other was doing.
When Kathryn moaned louder and began to part her thighs, Chakotay removed a hand from her breast. She had been about to complain when he moved down to kneel in front of her. His mouth replaced his hand, while said hand moved to the juncture between her thighs. When he began to stroke her clit, her head fell back and her hands moved to his hair.
"Oh god, Chakotay!" she groaned.
Chakotay moved up to kiss her, continuing to stroke her clit. She was slick and so very ready. At this he hardened, he was finding it very difficult to control himself.
Their kisses were passionate, full of love and lust. Kathryn placed her arms around Chakotay's neck, pulling him closer to her, yet not so close that he would have to stop stroking her. She had no intention of letting him stop.
Soon there was a surge of pleasure from within her. Chakotay could feel her begin to contract.
As she was thrusting towards him, he moved his fingers within her, feeling her muscles clench around him. At the same time her grip tightened around his neck.
"Oh god...oh god" she repeated her mantra over and over, as her orgasm was building.
As Chakotay continued to kiss her, suckling on her tongue and thrusting his fingers in and out of her body, he felt her body go rigid and she began to reach her climax. She began bucking against his hand and crying out his name.
Chakotay continued to hold her as her body began to come back down from its peak.
Kathryn pulled back from Chakotay and looked him in the eyes. She gave him a dazzling smile before speaking.
"Wow..." she gasped, trying to control her breathing and her body. "...I knew your hands were good...but" she kissed him trying to convey her feelings.
When they pulled apart, Chakotay spoke.
"I aim to please you!"
"You may continue with your aims, Commander"
"Aye, aye Captain!"
"You know what" she looked him up and down.
"What?" he asked moving into suckle her neck, having every intention of leaving his mark on her.
"You're way over-dressed."
"You could try and rectify that."
"It would be my great pleasure."
They stood up together and began to undress Chakotay. When Kathryn reached for his trousers, Chakotay stopped her.
"Chakotay?" her brow creased.
"Uhm..." he looked somewhat embarrassed.
"I've seen an erection before Chakotay" stroking his groin, enjoying his groan of pleasure.
"It's not that"
"What then?" she stopped, looking into his eyes.
"I should have changed my clothes."
"Why? They aren't going to be on for very long anyway, are they?"
"Well no...but" he sighed "I'm embarrassed about my underwear"
"Oh...why?"
"'Cause they aren't my regular boxers."
"Don't worry about it...I'm more interested in what's in the boxers, rather than the boxers Chakotay." she continued undoing his trousers despite his protests.
As they fell to the floor, Kathryn stepped back and took in his underwear. There before her was Chakotay dressed in only crisp, white, pressed boxers that went high over his stomach and ended just before his knees.
"They're..." she brought her hand to cover her mouth "...different" she fell on the bed laughing.
"Kathryn..." he sighed "...don't laugh" soon he began laughing with her "Next time I won't wear these"
"Yes you will...I'm extremely turned on by these boxers."
"Well then...expect to see them more often then."
Kathryn moved further onto the bed, allowing Chakotay to gaze upon her.
He slowly removed his white boxers before moving onto the bed beside her.
He lay on his side facing Kathryn, he rested his head on his hand, allowing his other hand to sweep over her body.
Before long, they were kissing once again and Chakotay moved between her legs, parting them. His head moved down to suckle her sensitive nub, tasting the remnants of her sweetness.
"Oh...Chakotay..." she wanted him, she needed him.
He moved up her body, kissing her as he went. Soon he was kissing her once again and his erect penis was positioned at her opening.
Kathryn smiled and nodded, giving him permission to continue. He entered her slowly, giving her time to adjust. Soon they began to move rhythmically, each tuned into the other.
Simultaneously, they reached their climax, each calling out the others name. As the calmed, Chakotay pulled Kathryn to him and began to speak.
"That was amazing...you were amazing."
Kathryn hid her face in the crook of his neck, blushing with embarrassment. When she looked at him again, she smiled.
"You were pretty damn good yourself." he kissed the tip of her nose.
"I love you Kathryn Janeway."
"I love you too Chakotay" her eyes began to well with tears
"Hey...what are those for?" he cupped her chin, wiping a tear with his thumb.
"No reason...I'm just so pleased I can finally say that out loud.
"I just love telling you I love you.
"Feel free to tell me whenever you want." she smiled
"I will" he moved to kiss her, when Kathryn pulled back.
"Do you fancy doing something daring?"
"What did you have in mind?"
"I've always wanted to do it in a Jeffries tube..." Chakotay's eyebrows shot up into his hairline, "...and the turbolift, not to mention the science lab" her eyebrows waggled seductively "You game, Commander?"
"With you Captain, I'm game for anything"
They quickly dressed and proceeded to the nearest Jeffries tube.Several hours later, they arrived back at Kathryn's quarters, laughing and out of breath. They fell onto the sofa.
"Well we've made love in a Jeffries tube, a turbolift..."
"the science lab"
"Sickbay"
"I nearly died when the Doctor entered" Chakotay laughed.
"That's why we hid behind the biobed" they continued to laugh.
"I guess..." Kathryn continued "that's what they call 'humping for England'"
"I beg your pardon?" Chakotay asked trying to control his laughter.
"Admiral Paris' secretary was British. We got talking one day and that colourful phrase was mentioned. Now I know what she meant."
They continued laughing when Kathryn's door chimed.
"Come in" the door opened to reveal Tuvok.
"Tuvok, what can I do for you?" Kathryn asked.
"I have had several reports concerning members of the crew using the Jeffries tubes for improper use and I felt it necessary to inform you Captain."
Kathryn and Chakotay both looked at Tuvok, then at one another before falling about laughing once again.
THE END...FINIS...OVER!!!
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