I hate being drugged to my eyeballs and the nasty side effects
Title: Believing
Author: Shadow/Phantomness
Pairing: Championshipping (Lance x Ash/Red)
Fandom: Pokmon
Theme: #28, Believe
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Pokemon belongs to Nintendo and Shogakukan Comics.
This non-profit, non-copyright infringing fanfiction belongs to me under
international copyright laws and taking it is plagiarism. Thank you.
*Phantomness bows*
Notes: <> for telepathy, ** for thoughts, italics
if a pokemon talks
Warnings: AU, Child neglect and possible mental and psychological damage, shonen-ai, though its more like friendship fluff
If he believes in himself, everything will be all right.
Red has lived by this mantra for a long time. Oh, he has friends, but nothing more than that. He was polite to Misty and gently turned her down, but the truth is hes scared to love.
It means giving up too much of himself to someone else, and he just cant do that. Its dangerous.
Besides, love is no guarantee of happiness. His parents were in love, but they still divorced when he was five, and his mom went to work in Houen with Devon Corporation. His father lives in Saffron, since he works for Silph, and they are rivals in all sense of the word now.
They arent even friendly rivals. Now, hes certain theyll sabotage each other if ever in the same room. Its frightening, especially to a child who may be Champion, but is still nave at heart.
He starts spending more and more time with the Elite Four in Indigo Plateau. No one questions it, since he is Champion.
In Indigo Plateau, he has a little suite with a kitchenette, a large bathroom, a bedroom, and a little study. He spends a lot of the time in the library, reading fairy tales, when he isnt facing impetuous challengers or training and playing with his pokmon.
Its quite peaceful, and he starts thinking of his parents less and less. After all, theyre too busy with their work.
He gets to know the Elite better, since if they have to live together, it might be good to be friends.
Lorelei rather likes to make dolls, and he enjoys watching her stitching them. She has dolls of all the gym leaders, and shes even making a doll of him, a tiny thing six inches tall dressed in his red jacket and jeans. She even made stuffed replicas of his pokmon team.
Agatha is similar, but her interests lie in needlepoint. The huge banner-map of the world is her pet project. Right now, shes adding the Sevii Islands in little spots of green thread. Shes almost like a grandmother, but one whos a really good trainer.
Red thinks he wouldnt mind if she were his grandmother.
He never knew his real grandparents. For some reason, his parents never took him to see them.
Perhaps they already disliked each other before he was born. That makes him sad. Or perhaps theyre sad because he was born?
Hes heard often that they could be advancing their careers, making their names as spectacular scientists and they are spectacular, since his father was on the team that developed the Master Ball and his mother works in Potions, but still
Did they ever love him?
He gets a letter once in a while, usually when hes foiled Team Rocket or something of equal value. He got his first letter when he became Champion.
But that was only after he proved his worth. Did they not care about him while he struggled on the journey?
It makes his head hurt and his chest ache to think about such things, so he tries not to. Still, his hands shake as his glass shatters.
Lance looks up and stops speaking, as he walks to Reds side.
If the proposal is making you emotional, we can take a break. He says. His voice is soft, nothing like the harsh tones he uses when speaking to those stuffy bureaucrats, and Red rubs his wrist as he wonders if Lance is wearing masks too.
He thinks he is.
But here with the Elite, they dont need them as much.
Its not that. Im sorry, Lance. My mind wandered.
Lance half-smiles. Perhaps a break is in order for all of us then. The rest of the Elite Four nod, and they all exit the room.
Red vaguely knows that they are discussing a welfare proposal, but he really knows nothing about it. Hes too young to deal with this kind of thing, but hes Champion, so his presence and vote is required.
You dont like this side of the Championship, do you? Lance asks, as they walk to the cafeteria.
Red grins. Youre right. Its so boring.
Boring but necessary, apparently, though Id like to hang the man who decided the Elite had to review the Kanto Governing Councils legislation. We may vote, but our votes count nothing in the end.
It helps influence public opinion though, right?
Lance smirks. Been reading political science books in the library?
Oh no. I was just thinking. They order, and sit at a table while they wait for their sandwiches to arrive. Red sips his glass of milk thoughtfully.
Lance, do you think I should give up my position?
Lance frowns. Why in Lugias name would you choose to do such a thing?
Because so much of this is almost irrelevant, and I feel bad. Im too little to understand. Red tries to say, but it doesnt quite come out the way he intended.
Lance shakes his head. Youre brilliant and anyone else who tells you different is lying.
My parents dont think so. Why is he telling Lance this? Perhaps his heart has overflowed and his emotions dont fit in their neat little box anymore. If he doesnt tell anyone, it will build up until he explodes or goes mad.
Your parents seem distant. Lance comments. Dont you ever go home?
Red laughs mirthlessly. Not anymore. Its only been six months since he came here, and he only went home once, and that was to collect and pack his belongings.
But are you lonely here?
Red shakes his head. Youre all very nice. The Elite Four, I mean. You dont treat me like an idiot.
You most certainly do not deserve such treatment.
You really think so? Red is almost shy.
Lance shakes his head as he gets up and pulls Red into a hug. Positive.
Red leans into it, feeling a lot better. Sure, the Elite dont avoid physical contact, but its kind of strange.
Lance is hugging him!
It makes him quite happy.
So he kisses Lance on the cheek, and then they eat their sandwiches quietly.
After lunch is over, they go back to the meeting, but its not so bad. Lance talks slowly, and he can ask questions. No one minds, since this stuff takes time to learn and is mind-boggling even for the experienced members.
And maybe, he can take the first step towards being himself.
End Fic
Completed 9/11/06
Is it disrespectful of me to write fanfic on this date, I wonder?