"Hoping, praying, I've been waiting... everybody needs somebody to love. There's no question, straight from heaven- you're my angel... I'm so crazy for you. Holding your hand, touching your face, I will love you now and always, I swear. I will never forget that first moment we met... when two worlds collided and I found my best friend. I was made for you, you were made for me. In this lonely world, we were meant to be in love." ("Godsend", dc Talk)
Chapter Twenty-Three
"We're not moving until we figure this out!" Kerry said, sitting on Nick so he couldn't try to escape.
"Angel, we're gonna be here all day!" he whined, pretending to be annoyed. It couldn't have been further from the truth, he was just as excited about planning the wedding as she was.
"That's what I'm afraid of!" Kerry laughed, "So let's get going on it!"
"Okay okay, what do we have left to do?" Nick asked, slipping his arms around Kerry's waist and peering over her shoulder at the stack of papers in front of her on the table.
"Left? We've barely started!! We have to decide where we want to have it, who's going to be in it, find dresses and tuxes, order invitations, flowers, arrange a caterer..." Kerry paused to take a breath and was completely silenced by Nick turning her head and kissing her.
"Chill out. This is not hard. Who's gonna be in it? The guys.. Haley... your friends from work?"
"Yeah... that's what I was thinking." she said, leaning back against him.
"See? There's one thing down already. Now where do you want it to be? A church? Outside somewhere?" he asked, twirling her hair around his finger.
"I'd actually like to have it here at the house..." she said.
"That would be cool. I'm thinking kinda small.. close friends and family, right?"
She nodded. "I don't want anything big. Just something small and intimate."
"So we have who and where... what's next?"
"Everything else will probably require going out and looking at stuff." She laughed, "I do get a little carried away don't I?"
He kissed her cheek, "Nah, just excited. And we'll go look at whatever you want, whenever you want to."
"Okay, since we're talking about looking... I have kind of a strange request to make." Kerry said, turning around on his lap to face him.
"And that would be what?" Nick asked, raising an eyebrow.
"I want you to go dress shopping with me."
"Isn't that like, bad luck or something?"
"I think we're a little stronger than superstition." she said, smiling.
"I know we are. And if you want me to, I'd love to." he replied, kissing her lips softly. "Now I have a question for you... if you take my last name, can Miah? Or would you even want her to?"
Kerry hugged him tight, "I was thinking about that, too... of course I want her to. I want her to be as much yours as she can be." She let go of him, and leaned back a little, looking at him. "And what do you mean, 'if I take your last name'? Is that a hint you don't want me to?"
"God no! I can't wait to see Mrs. Kerry Carter on things." he said, pulling her to him again.
Kerry sighed against him, "I love the way that sounds. And for Miah to take it, you'd have to legally adopt her."
"So, we'll just ask Mrs. Lawson or someone to find out what I'd need to do, and then I'll do it."
"I love you. I'm so glad you want to do this... you are her daddy..." Kerry said quietly.
"I love you, too. And I love her, I love being her dad." Nick replied, kissing her forehead.
~~~~
A week later Kerry and Nick were in Mrs. Lawson's office, to find out what would have to be done to make Miah legally Nick's.
"Well, unfortunately in this case, both parents have to consent. You'd have to get her father to give up all parental rights and responsibilities..." Mrs. Lawson said. "And somehow I can't see him being overly cooperative."
Kerry sighed. "Yeah... little problem there.. but, I want this, and i'm not going to let him stand in the way. So, we'll figure something out... and once we do.. what happens then?"
Nick smiled. He was proud of her, she'd come a long way. She wasn't going to let him intimidate her anymore. He liked to think that he'd helped her a little, she was always telling him he had, and it made him feel good. She was everything to him, he wanted to be able to do everything he could for her.
Mrs. Lawson smiled, "Okay, after we get the consent, you'll have to get all the paperwork filled out and submitted, there will be a hearing, where the certificates are issued and then the birth certificate is amended."
"Her birth certificate would be changed? We have to get this done." Kerry said.
"I'm thinking that there would have to be some other way around this though, getting the consent, since they have no contact whatsoever, and never have. Plus his being in jail doesn't exactly help his case any... let me do some checking and I'll see what I can find out."
Kerry squeezed Nick's hand as they walked out of the office, "I didn't know they would actually change her birth certificate... that is, god, I want this so bad."
Nick pulled her into a tight hug, "I do, too, and we're going to get it. So don't worry about it, alright?"
Kerry nodded, "We're going to." She hopped in the truck and asked, "Now are you up to dress shopping?"
"I'm feeling brave today, sure." he smiled.
"Brave? Sure you can me to marry you and that's no problem, but it takes courage to go dress shopping with me." Kerry teased, slipping her hand up and down his thigh.
"Well, yeah... I was pretty sure you'd say yes when I asked... but I don't know that I'll make it out of this store any time today, and that kinda scares me." he said, leaning over to kiss her while they were at a red light.
"Pretty sure? There shouldn't have been any doubt in your mind... I would have said yes if you'd asked me months ago. And I'm not that bad to shop with!"
He reached over to hold her hand, "No you are not bad to shop with, and I'm even kind of excited about this, if you must know the truth. And like how many months is months ago?"
Kerry laughed lightly and said, "I was hoping when you asked me to move in... that it would either be that or for me to marry you... but I would have said yes even before that... I love you so much... I knew I could from the day we met."
Nick pulled into the parking lot of the wedding boutique and went around to help Kerry out. He opened the door and gave her a hug. "I love you, too. And just for your information... I knew I'd ask you... eventually... after that day at DisneyWorld."
She smiled and kissed him, "Thank you. Now let's shop." She grabbed his hand and pulled him into the store.
Nick stopped just inside the door and looked around, "Oh god. This is scarier than the wardrobe room at a video shoot."
"Oh hush!" Kerry said, leading him over to what looked to him like an endless rack of dresses skimming the entire outline of the inside walls.
A sales lady quickly appeared out of no where and pulled Kerry off to another section of dresses, while asking her a million rapidfire questions.
Nick shook his head and followed at a distance, studying the design in the carpet until he heard Kerry shrieking, "OHMYGOD! That's IT!!" He looked up to see Kerry holding up a dress he couldn't tell much about, and then watched her disappear into a dressing room. 'Okay. I guess I wait here.' he thought, browsing around. A display of tiaras caught his eye and he wandered over to them. He smiled and picked the one that had caught his attention up thinking it was only fitting that his Cinderella should have her crown.
Kerry gasped at her reflection in the mirror. "Oh god, it's perfect." she breathed. Not too flashy, but very beautiful... lightly beaded bodice that laced in the back, with full skirt and short train. "Can I go show him?" she asked Janis, the lady who'd help her get into the dress.
"Of course." Janis said, pushing the curtains aside to let Kerry out of the room.
She glanced around for him, and saw him looking at something. "Nick?"
He turned around, tiara in hand, and almost dropped it when he saw Kerry. His mouth fell slightly open as he looked her up and down. He walked slowly over to her, continuing to let his eyes sweep over her body.
Kerry watched him, "What do you think?"
"I think that I am looking at the most beautiful thing I've ever seen." he said softly.
Kerry smiled and threw her arms around him, hugging him tight. "What do you have?"
Nick stepped back and put the tiara on her head, positioning it. "Perfect" he smiled.
Kerry walked over to a mirror and giggled. "I get to be queen for a day?" She turned back around to him, "I love it."
~~~~
"That's GREAT!!" Kerry said excitedly into the phone. "Yes, we'll be there soon!"
"What is it?" Nick asked, pulling Kerry onto the chair with him.
"That was Mrs. Lawson. She did some checking and apparently, if the non-custodial parent hasn't seen the child in a certain length of time, it negates the need for consent! And since Josh has never actually had any contact with Miah, we don't need it! All we have to do is fill out the paper work! She said she's got it at her office, we can go do it whenever, and the adoption will be finalized when we get married." Kerry said, with a huge smile.
"Told you it would work out." Nick said, kissing her.
~~~~
"Wow! That is SO beautiful!!" Meredith raved when Kerry showed her the wedding dress.
"And there's something else..." Kerry dashed over to grab the tiara and set it on her head. She batted her eyelashes and gave the girls her best royal impression.
Haley laughed, "Queen of the Kingdom that is Carter."
"I still can't believe you're getting married," Sara sighed.
"It's about time she is." Deidre commented. "She's got the perfect guy, she'd be crazy not to!"
"That's the truth!" Kerry said. She was glad she'd asked them to be her bridesmaids, they'd been there since the beginning of her relationship with Nick, it only seemed right they'd be there for the wedding. Her dress had been ordered a month ago, and it had taken that long to be able to get all the girls together at the same time. Janis had assured Kerry that it would only take three weeks for the bridesmaids dresses to come in, which would give them plenty of time to be altered for the wedding.
"Okay... here are the styles Kerry picked..." Janis said, coming out of the back room with an armload of dresses.
"Styles?" Haley asked.
"Yeah, I picked a couple, so you could decide what you liked best. I didn't want you having to wear something I picked out and you hated." Kerry replied.
The girls quickly narrowed it down to two dresses out of the seven Kerry had picked and sent Haley to try them on.
"What color are they going to be?" Sara asked.
"Kind of a silvery-platinum..." Kerry said, walking off.
Meredith wrinkled her nose. "Silvery-platinum?"
Kerry grabbed the dress in the color she was talking about. "I know, it sounds awful.. but it's not... see?"
"Oh! Wow, okay, yeah, that's not bad!" Meredith said, looking closely at the dress. "What about the guys?"
"Their vests are going to be this color, and black tuxes. God, Nick found his the other day... someone is going to have to tie my hands together so I don't try to rip it off of him during the ceremony! He looks sooo sexy in it." Kerry said, shuddering at the thought of seeing him in at again.
"I came in at the wrong part of this." Haley said walking out of the dressing room in the first dress. "I like this, it makes my boobs look bigger."
"I like it already!" Deidre exclaimed. "Actually, I really do like that..."
Haley tried on the other one, but everyone agreed the first one was definitely the best. Measurements were taken, shoes were found, finishing up the last of the shopping that needed to be done in preparation for the wedding.
"How did today go?" Nick asked later that night as he held Kerry close, caressing her face, still flushed from making love.
"It was so easy, we all agreed on one and they're all ordered. Janis told me Miah's dress could be in as soon as next week." she replied, brushing her fingertips across his shoulders.
"So, then we're finished? All we have to do is get married now?"
Kerry grinned, "Yup. The invitations have been sent, flowers have been ordered, caterer, pastor and dj have been booked, everything we need for the reception has been taken care of, honeymoon reservations are made ... all we have do is be dressed, in the backyard, at three o'clock, in..." she paused to mentally calculate, "five weeks and four days."
"I can't wait." he said, kissing lightly all over her face. He moved off of her, and drew her to him, spooning her. "I love you, Kerry. I've never been this sure of anything, as much as I am that I want to be with you forever." he whispered.
She snuggled back against him, pulling his arm around her and slipping her fingers between his. "I love you, too... would it be okay with you, if we wrote our own vows? So I can tell you what I want to, rather than what some, like, monk wrote 500 years ago?"
Nick chuckled, "I would much rather hear what you have to say to me, so, yes, I like that idea." He'd already been working on something for her, he wasn't sure what it was going to be, a poem, a song, or a letter, just a collection of his thoughts and feelings that he'd been intending to give her on their wedding night.
~~~~
"So, this will be official then, when we get married?" Kerry asked Mrs. Lawson, not looking up from the copy of the paper that listed her and Nick as Miah's parents.
"Yes. Rights were granted at the hearing, her birth certificate will be amended as soon as you get the orginal copy of that paper stamped by a notary, which you can do as soon as your married." Mrs. Lawson said.
Kerry impulsively hugged her, "Thank you so much for everything."
"You're very welcome. Now go show that to Nick." Mrs. Lawson said, smiling.
Kerry tucked the paper back in the envelope and stuck it in her purse. That would be her other present to give him next Saturday. She hurried off to the bridal shop to meet Haley and the girls while they got their dresses altered.
~~~~
Kerry stood in the window looking out over the wonderland the backyard had been transformed into. Bright bunches of roses scattered everywhere, tiny twinkling lights wrapped around anything that would hold still for the reception that evening. It was just... perfect.
"Sissy?" Haley called, coming into the room. "You okay?"
"Never been better." she said, turning to smile at Haley, who was already in her dress. "You look beautiful, Hay."
Haley blushed, "Thanks. The other girls are here, and you need to be getting ready!"
"All I have to do is put my dress on." Kerry said.
"Aren't you supposed to be freaking out about now? You're like, way too calm."
"The only thing I'm worried about is tripping on that slippery white thing... after Miah throws a million rose petals on it." she laughed. She looked back out the window and turned to Haley again, "I'm not nervous at all. I'm so ready for this, ready to be with him."
Haley sighed, "I can't believe you're getting married. I'm so happy for you." She gave Kerry a hug and then went to pick up the ringing phone. "Hello? Why are you calling? You can't wait another two hours?"
"Gimme the phone!" Kerry yelled, grabbing the receiver away from Haley. "Nick?"
"Hey Beautiful." Nick said, smiling at the sound of her voice. "You ready for this?"
"Absolutely. The next two hours are going to kill me."
"I know... I need one of your amazing massages right now, too. I hate your sister's bed." Nick laughed. At Haley's insistence, he'd spent the night at her apartment, to meet the mandatory requirement of not seeing the bride until the wedding.
"I'm sorry, love. I promise I'll make you feel all better tonight." Kerry said, anxious for the night to come.
"I already feel better since I got to talk to you."
Haley came bouncing into the room again, "Off the phone! Now! we have to be ready for pictures in 15 minutes!"
"I gotta go, obviously. I love you. I'll see you in two hours." Kerry said, making a kissy noise into the phone.
"I'm counting the seconds. I love you, too." He hung up and went back to getting ready, wishing Brian would hurry up and get here so he could get back to their house, be closer to Kerry.
~~~~
"You've got a way with me, somehow you got me to believe in everything that I could be. I've gotta say- you've really got a way. You've got a way it seems, you gave me faith to find my dreams. You'll never know just what it means, can't you see... You've got a way with me. It's in the way you want me, it's in the way you hold me... the way you show me just what love's made of, it's in the way we make love. You've got a way with words, you get me smiling even when it hurts. There's no way to measure what your love is worth. I can't believe the way you get through to me. It's in the way you want me, it's in the way you hold me... the way you show me just what love's made of, it's in the way we make love. Oh how I adore you, like no one before you. I love you just the way you are. It's in the way you want me, it's in the way you hold me... the way you show me just what love's made of, it's in the way we make love. It's just the way you are." ("You've got a way", Shania Twain)
Nick held Kerry close, hugging her tightly to his chest as the danced together for the first time as husband and wife. He'd let her pick the song they'd dance to, so it had been a suprise to him, one that had brought tears to his eyes. The whole wedding had been like a dream- Kerry had looked so beautiful, Miah was precious, and they, along with everyone at the wedding, had both cried when they recited their vows to each other. Promises of faith, trust, and honesty, hopes for the furture, thanks for being so good for each other, and a pledge to be in love forever. There was nothing else he could ever ask for.
Kerry had her eyes closed, head rested against Nick's chest, listening to his heart beat as he held her. It seemed unreal to her now that there had ever been a time she'd sworn she'd never fall in love, never be married. She was amazed how her life had changed, all because of one person- that had just while ago promised in front of everyone important to them to love her forever, to never let go of her.
Around midnight Nick collapsed into a chair, pulling Kerry onto his lap, who immediately curled up and put her head on his shoulder. A lot of the guests had begun to leave, trickling out after wishing them well. He kissed Kerry's cheek and whispered, "Is there any polite way to tell them to leave?"
Kerry laughed. "I'm about ready to just tell them to leave, I have a wedding night to get on with. It's just our friends left, kick them out!"
Haley came over to them, with Miah nodding off in her arms. "We're getting out of here. We'll be at my place tonight, then we're coming back out here tomorrow afternoon, you'll be gone by then right?"
"Yeah, we leave at 10." Nick said, gently pushing Kerry off his lap so he could hug Miah. He kissed her forehead, "I love you, princess. I'm gonna miss you."
Miah gave him a sleepy smile and mumbled, "Love you too, daddy. Bwing me a pwesent."
"Of course we will, munchkin. I love you." Kerry said, giving her a little hug and then hugged Haley. "Thank you sissy. I love you, too."
"I love you both, have fun. Try to actually leave the hotel a few times, I want pictures of Paris." Haley giggled.
An hour later the only people left were the unassembling the decorations in the backyard and told Nick they'd just leave when they were finished.
Nick scooped Kerry up and carried her into the house, and up to their bedroom. "I hate to say this, but I'm exhausted."
Kerry flopped over on the bed, and mumbled into the pillows, "Don't worry about it, I am too."
Nick laughed and lay down next to her, "You know, we should probably at least get out of these clothes."
"What? You mean I can't sleep in my dress?" Kerry asked, smiling at him.
"You look gorgeous in it, but really, I'd rather you didn't." he said, kissing her softly.
"Oh fine fine. Actually, I have an idea. Jacuzzi?"
"Sounds great. I'll go get it ready, you just.. find your way out of the dress." He said, getting up and undressing.
"It's easier to get out of than into." She said, unzipping it and quickly sliding it off. "I'm gonna go get us something to drink, we have alot to celebrate."
"There's champagne in the fridge from the neighbors." Nick said as he disappeared into the bathroom, running water in the jacuzzi and lighting candles around it.
"Okay!" Kerry called, going downstairs. She grabbed the certificate she'd been keeping in her desk drawer, and got two champagne glasses. She filled them with milk, rather than champagne and headed back upstairs.
Nick turned the lights off and slid into the jacuzzi, the song he'd written for her printed out on sheet music laying on the steps up to the tub.
Kerry came into the bathroom, glad the lights had been turned off and set the glasses behind his head. As she was getting into the tub, certificate in hand, she caught sight of the papers on the step. "What's this?" she asked, picking it up.
"A little something I wrote for my wife." Nick smiled.
Kerry read the words, little tears slipping down her cheeks. She set the papers back down and sat on Nick's lap, facing him. She kissed him slowly, passionately, before whispering, "That's so beautiful. Thank you so much." She smiled and sniffled, then said, "I have something for you, too." and handed him the certificate.
He saw what it was, read over it quickly and pulled her into a tight hug. "I love you, Kerry." he let go of her to look in her eyes. He wiped his eyes, and said, "Doesn't seem quite like a fair exchange, I write you a song, and you give me a daughter."
Kerry bit her lip, then smiled and kissed him again, "You've given me everything, I could ever want and then some... and it's not about being equal, it's doing the things we can for each other because we love each other."
Nick smiled, "Very true. Where'd the champagne go? I say we have a toast to us."
Kerry giggled a little, and reached behind him to grab the glasses, wondering if he'd notice right away. She handed him one and kept the other, smiling at him.
Nick took the glass without looking and said, "To us- in love forever."
Kerry kissed him, "In love forever." and clinked her glass against his. She took a sip of the now-warm milk and watched him do the same.
Nick made a face, "Angel, that's not champagne."
"I know." Kerry smiled, trying not to laugh.
"Is there any reason we're drinking milk?" he asked, tilting her glass to see if she had the same.
She leaned forward, putting her glass back behind him again and wrapped her arms around his neck. She licked along the outline of his ear and whispered, "Because you can't have alcohol when you're pregnant."
Nick dropped the glass he was holding into the water, "What?"
Kerry leaned back to look at him, "I'm pregnant."
Nick's eyes were wide, "Like now?"
She nodded. "For about two months now."
"And you're just telling me now?" he asked, unable to take his eyes off hers.
"Yeah, I wanted to wait to tell you tonight." she said, wishing he'd do something besides just looked surprised.
Nick pulled her close to him and held her tightly. "We're gonna have a baby?" he whispered.
Kerry sighed happily, "Yes we are."
A big smile slowly spread across Nick's face as he stood up and helped Kerry out of the water, drying her and then himself off. He picked her up and carried her into their bedroom, laying her down in the center of the bed. He kissed her softly on the lips and slowly slid his hands down until they were resting on her stomach.
Kerry watched him, loving the feel of his hands on her, and the smile on his face. She was excited, she had been from the time she first suspected she was pregnant. She wanted this- to have his baby, a product of their love. The past month had nearly driven her crazy, not telling him. But she wanted to wait to tell him tonight, give him a wedding present of sorts.
He rubbed her tummy gently and leaned down to kiss just below her belly button. He looked up at her, still smiling, eyes bright, "Just when I think things can't get any better, they always do."
"Dreams will come and go, but this is here to stay, forever this way.
Hold me now, and say the things you say, hold me now, I pray.
So here we are at the start of this road, together building castles in the air.
Words we don't need, without you I don't breathe.
Forever building castles in the air."
("Castles in the air", B*Witched)