Chapter Three
"Lose her to her father? What?" Nick asked, intentionally lowering his voice and inflecting the gentlest possible tone.
Kerry was torn on what to do- she didn't know just how much she should or could tell him, but at the same time, she felt like she had to tell him, and probably right now- while there was a chance, he was obviously listening. And if she was going to have any kind of relationship with him, he was going to have to know these things about her. She looked across the pink table at him, waiting patiently for her to decide how or if to answer him. He appeared to be honestly interested and even concerned. 'Might as well tell him now', she thought, just intending to give him an outline of sorts, just the timeline, nothing too personal.
She took a deep breath. "He's... threatened to take her before... and he's tried, actually... so when she disappeared it freaked me out..."
"Take her?" Nick asked, suddenly knowing he was going to get quite a story.
"Yeah, take her away from me, since I... how did he say it?.. since I'm not good enough to be her mother." Kerry said looking pained.
"Excuse me? No offense, but what kinda guy IS he?" Nick couldn't understand something like that, how could someone tell the mother of their child that she wasn't good enough?
"A very, very bad one." Kerry's voice was soft, shaky.
Nick noticed that Kerry's eyes had changed color- they seemed almost grey now, compared to the most beautiful blue he'd ever found himself looking into- almost cotton candy blue. It saddened him to see that just talking about someone could bring such a change to her, and he didn't like it- but knew something had to be said here, and he was going to let her. "What did he do to you?"
"'What didn't he do?' would be easier to answer." Kerry looked Nick right in the eye. "Are you sure you want to know this?"
"Yeah, I do. I wanna know you... and whatever you're about to tell me, is part of you, and I want to know about it."
Kerry closed her eyes for a moment. The only person who really knew the entire story was Haley, who been unfortunate to witness many parts of it. Something told her, though, that Nick needed to know the whole thing, not just the "highlights" and that she should tell him. Now.
Nick watched her carefully as she closed her eyes, obviously considering what she was about to say. He was almost confused about his intense concern for her. Hadn't he been just worried he'd never find the right person? He figured that also meant he'd never really fall for anyone either, but this, this was weird. He'd known her all of two hours, and suddenly everything she had to say was of the utmost importance to him. And he already hated Miah's father, whoever he was, and he didn't know that much about him.
Kerry opened her eyes again, and arranged herself on the seat of the booth. "Okay, I met Josh when I was fourteen. He was sixteen and sort of a bad-boy. I was such a goody-goody, and of course, got a major crush on him. So, when he started paying attention to me, I just about died, ohmygod, he likes me. He asked me to go out with him, or whatever and I had to say yes. And suddenly I was the coolest- I had an older boyfriend who could drive and bought me things." She paused for a second, to sigh, a kind of annoyed sigh, like she couldn't really believe she'd done the things she was talking about. "He started introducing me do things I'd have never dreamed of trying- pot, alcohol, all sorts of shit." She quickly glanced at Miah to she if she'd picked up on that word, but she was still completely into her coloring. "And for some reason, I wanted to be with him all the time. It was different, exciting. I'd sneak out of the house at night to go places with him, do stuff I know I shouldn't have even considered. After a while though, I guess my novelty wore off, and he started to hit me. I wouldn't be wearing what he wanted me to, or I'd look at some other guy if he talked to me, or would to hang out with my girlfriends when he thought I should be with him, and he'd hit me, rough me up. I learned to hide that really fast, so my parents wouldn't get suspicious. But Haley, that's my little sister, she found out pretty quick- she'd hear me crying at night, trying to figure out what I'd done wrong..." She stopped talking again, her face making her inner feelings known, it hurt her to talk about all this.
Nick couldn't believe what he was hearing. And what really bothered him is he was sure he hadn't heard the worst of it yet. He leaned forward a little, showing her she still had his undivided attention.
"Nothing I ever did made him happy... and he told me so repeatedly. I was stupid and worthless - blah blah blah, but yet, he wouldn't let me go or quit bugging me about sex. I didn't want to do it- I was only 15! But he wouldn't leave me alone about it- even thought I kept saying no.. so I told him no one more time and he told me that was the wrong answer and he was tired of waiting... so he raped me, pretty much, and after that I saw really no reason to not have sex with him- I'd done it once, so why not? Then I found out I was pregnant... he, of course, freaked. First he said she wasn't his, that I was cheating on him, and then beat the crap out of me. I think that was the first time I realized how bad he was for me, but I didn't do anythng about it... I was afraid to lose him, god only knows why... I guess I was just so used to him, even if he was awful to me. I stopped doing everything- the drugs, the drinking, all of it, as soon as I knew... I may have made a mess of my life, but I wasn't going to do that to my kid. Things weren't too bad while we were still in school, but the summer after freshman year he was around all the time, usually telling me what an bad mother I'd be, and I didn't even deserve to be having his baby, all the while still hitting me. Towards the end of summer, he hauled off and punched me in the stomach, and I was so afraid he'd hurt the baby, I knew it had to end right then..." Kerry stopped talking to take a breath, her face pale.
Nick stared at her, wide-eyed, and mouth hanging slightly open. No wonder she kept pulling away from him. How could someone treat another person like that? And Kerry, there was something about her that made her instantly likable, Nick definitely felt it, and that made it even more unfathomable to him how that jerk could do all those things to her.
"So, I broke up with him, and he said he was going to kill me and he almost did that night... I was finally smart enough to tell my mom then... I stayed out of school, and she home schooled me. It wasn't like he didn't know where we lived though, so he kept coming around. We finally got a restraining order against him. Anyway, Miah was born three weeks after my 16th birthday. Josh was not there, and stayed away for quite awhile. But he shows up randomly sometimes and says he's going to take her from me. I'll kill him before I let him take her."She paused, like she was considering what she just said. "So, I still live at home, where it's safe... I've got my parents and Haley, and I'm doing okay now, I guess. Anyway, that's my story. What's yours?"
Nick was floored. He thought he'd had to be responsible at 16, but that was nothing like what Kerry had been doing. He was proud of her, that she'd been able to get out of such a bad situation. His story? He knew all hers, so he might as well spill, too. "My story.. um well, my ex-girlfriend was ... possessive and jealous, extremely high-maintenance, she occassionally slapped me around, which I did not know how to deal with... and she used me.. got what she wanted, and things got worse, because she didn't need me anymore... she was just no good- to me or for me. So, I broke up with her.. not too long ago, actually. She didn't take that very well, and I don't know why- it's not like she needed me for anything. That's pretty much it, right there." He didn't really feel it necessary to explain more than that just yet.
"Huh, we should get her and Josh together and let them go at it. They'd have a ball with each other." Kerry said, and finished up her chocolate slush, slurping as the straw reached the bottom of the cup. She giggled, "Whoops."
Nick had to smile at her. She was just what he'd needed, and at exactly the right time. "Y'know, I'm really proud of you, Kerry."
She looked shocked, "Thanks, but why is that?"
"You got out of all that mess, and you are doing really well for yourself and Miah. That takes alot of guts."
Kerry laughed a little. "Wasn't guts- it was sheer terror... and I guess motherly instinct, I knew I couldn't raise a kid in an environment like that... and I had to get out before he killed me and he was all she had left." She glanced over at Miah, who'd been unusually quiet. Then she saw why. Miah had fallen asleep, head resting on her coloring book, crayon still clutched in her hand. "I think that means it's time for us to go."
Dammit. Nick didn't want her to go anywhere. "Okay..." He scooted over towards Miah a little, and carefully gathered the sleeping little girl in his arms and held her while Kerry grabbed the coloring book and crayons.
Kerry loved seeing Miah with him, she looked safe... and Kerry felt like she was. She smiled at Nick, who returned her grin, and offered to take Miah.
"It's okay, I've got her." he said, and began walking towards the door.
Kerry followed him, not quite sure of everything that had happened this afternoon and whether or not it was a good thing. They reached the car and Kerry unlocked the door. and leaned the seat back. Nick layed her down softly and closed the door, leaning against the car.
"So, could I maybe get you to go out with me, just the two of us sometime?" he asked, smiling hopefully.
"Oh, I suppose so. When do you have in mind? Gotta make sure Haley's available to munchkin-sit."
"How about... Friday night?"
"Sounds good to me." She gave him her number, to call later and get details for Friday.
He watched her get into the car and drive off, wondering what he'd gotten himself into, but feeling good about it. He knew his parents would freak when they found out she had a kid, but for some reason, he wasn't worried about it. He jumped into the Durango and sped off, wanting to get home to tell Brian he'd found something to pull himself out his funk.
Kerry couldn't stop smiling as she drove home. She had a date with a guy who could quite possibly prove her sister's theory on men wrong. And to her very pleasant surprise, she couldn't have been happier about it.