|Many people have a hard time believing it, but I am a very shy person. Though many people see me as gregarious, I was always very reserved. I was never very outgoing. But at the same time, I was sort of a clown. This became a problem when people were voting for senior favorites when I was a senior in high school. You see, I really wanted to be in our school yearbook as a senior favorite. I figured my best bet would be “shyest in the class.” I thought it was my best shot to be a senior favorite, since I wasn’t very likely to succeed, I wasn’t very ambitious, nor was a tall or short, which were the other categories people could vote on. So I lobbied my fellow students to vote for me as being the shyest. Not many people voted for me, however. Most people said that I was not shy at all.|
|People pointed out the time when I was in 10th grade, when I proclaimed my self the sheriff of the high school, as an example of me not being shy. You see, a friend of mine bought a package of Marlboros once. In the package, there was this pin that was in the shape of a star that sort of emulated a sheriffs badge. When I saw it, I said, “Who in their right mind would wear this as an accessory??? That would be a very weird fashion statement!!!” Being curios, I decided to put on the badge and see what kind of reaction I would get.
I clearly felt like a new man when I wore this badge. When I walked down the school hall, everyone gave me a double take. Even the upper classmen gave me a second look, which was helpful, because I had this big crush with this girl in the eleventh grade. You wouldn’t believe the kind of looks I got in the hallway. Many would think that they were looks of disrespect, but I liked to call it looks of respect. I clearly had to keep this new fashion accessory!!!
People started asking me, however, why I was wearing a sheriff’s badge. I gave a variety of reasons why I wore the badge, but only one really stuck with the school population. It was the reason I told this one hot girl. She asked me why I was wearing a sheriff’s badge and I didn’t want to look stupid and say that it was some sort of weird fashion statement. So to impress her with my humor, I told her that I was the new sheriff in the high school. I mean everyone loves law enforcement officers, right???? I was hoping that she would think I was cute after that, but I am not sure my plan worked. What ended up happening is that a bunch of people found out what I said really quickly. They started yelling down the hall “Hey Nick!!! Heard there’s a new sheriff in town!!!!!” Well, I decided to go along with the act. So I walked into my biology class, with a cowboy strut, and told my biology teacher, and the class, with my best country accent, that “I was the new sheriff in town, and yo’all are gonna abide by my laws!!!!!”
My biology teacher loved it. After that she often asked me to do my cowboy impersonation during the laboratory period. Additionally, whenever she had to leave class for a few minutes, she would leave me, the sheriff, in charge!!! Clearly my job as sheriff was going great. I also bought this memo pad, and wrote tickets to people who were walking in the hall too fast. This became a popular ritual in my school. Many, many girls asked me if I could write them a ticket. Sort of like an autograph thing. . I even over heard these two unbelievably hot girls talking about me. They were saying how unbelievably funny and cute I was. I was clearly flying high up to this point.
|Things may started getting out of hand when my friend Jason and I decided to have scheduled gun slinging matches in the school hall way. Jason agreed to be my arch nemesis, and we would pretend to draw (we couldn’t use toy guns, so we used our hands) where I would get shot. The Sheriff thing got way to commercial for my taste and only lasted a few weeks.
So people mentioned examples like this when they refused to vote for me as “shiest in the class.” I do have a bunch of other examples the seniors of my class gave me of why they couldn’t vote for me as the class shiest, but I think I am going to save it for my autobiography. Make sure to ask for a copy when I finish it, hopefully by the end of Summer 2001.