In the centuries recently past, particularly after the Storming of the Bastille, the educational standards of the earth have extended themselves to embrace more people than ever before. Nowhere is this less evident than in the time-treasured ignorance of drummers. Those heathen bastards talk in a manner befitting common gutter whores, speaking in strange, unwholesome tongues. The superlative lexicograhpic staff of Webster Random's, in conjunction with Percussion World, bring you the authoritative compilation of these bizzarre idioms. God Save the Queen.

Huh huh... drum slang, and stuff! Cool.

NOTE: Potentially offensive language follows! Believe it or not, drummers do tend to be a bit pottymouthed on occasion!

Antravasado (anh tra va sah doh) n. Playing out of clave (3/2 or 2/3) in latin music

Apeshit (ayp shitt) adj. Using large movements with arms and body; going very fast and loud. i.e., During the solo, Jared went apeshit on the bass drums.

Ashtray hand (ash tray hand) n. when the left hand (traditional grip) of a snare player is facing up looking like an ash tray.

Backstick (back stik) v. Playing with the butt end of the stick.

Bag (bag) n. <1> Anything which is horrible, i.e. a musical score, a performance, etc. (i.e. That drumline was the bag.) <2> The worst player in a particular section. also tick box, bag of ass

Bag of Suck (bag of suk) n. When there is so much suckin' goin' on in the whole Drumline that it comprises an entire bag of it!! i.e. You guys are screwin around so much that you look and sound like a giant bag of suck!!

Balls (balz) n. Intensity; i.e., Play with some balls, man. also sacks, cajones

Balls-to-the-walls (balz to tha walz) adj. Seriously intense.

Ballzando (baltz ahn doh) adj. A dynamic level far above all traditional dynamic levels. i.e., "You guys don't have to play it at ballzando to be heard over the pit."

Beating (beet ing) n. A drumline practice session that teeters on the line between very tough rehearsal and raw, all-out punishment, intended to establish discipline or simply to improve chops. see also roll stroll.

Bill Beater (bill beet ehr) n. <1> A variation of the Egg Beater that is played with a 16th note before the E.B. that is played R-RRRLLR-RRRLL etc also played off left hand.

Bitch (bich) n. A relatively virgin drum line addition whom is frequently called upon for such services as fetching water, picking up trash, carrying things around on the field, and being subjected to countless acts of ridicule and embarrassment.

Bitch Beater (bich beet-ehr) n. Means you are playing way too loud.

Book (book) n. The musical score/drillwriting for the season.

Bring it up (bring it up) v. <1> To torque a drum to the point of breaking. <2> To play at your personal best; i.e., "Bring it up, drumline!"

Bunk (bungk) adj. See 'dirty'.

Burn (buhrn) v. To play any lick or passage very fast...can be done solo or with other players. i.e. "Let's burn triplet diddle once." also reef, i.e. "We were reefin' the '94 Blue Devils shopping spree last night!"

Butterflies (butt er flies) n. Tenor crossover/sweep lick; notated as 32: 13242413 13132424. Produces a "butterfly" looking arm motion. also helicopters

Buzz Kill (buzz kihl) n. Expecting a cool lic, but it turns out to suck, i.e. "The Bluecoats drumline is a total buzz kill."

Cheese (cheez) n. A note which is both flammed and diddled (dragged).

Cheezz (cheez) n. A poorly written part, i.e. That whole bar was nothing but cheezz.

Chef, (the) (chef) n. A percussionist who plays traditional grip and can't keep that good ol' left hand down, just likes stiring chicken noodle soup...

Chili Dogs (chill ee dogz) n. Rudiment - flam taps, with cheese on the flams. also cheese flam accent, cheeselet

Chops (chopz) n. <1> The muscles located in the wrist of a drummer. <2> Any area of the hand that is sore after drumming for hours. <3> The physical ability level of a drummer. i.e. "He's got good chops."

Chop out (chop owt) v. To play a part that is rudimentally simple, but still hard to play because of the speed it is played at.

Chop wood (chop wud) v. To play the drum at any angle besides perpendicular to the head.

Chuchutta (chuh chuht ah) n. Flam accented triplets with an added flam on the third note of each triplet

Clam (clam) n. A mistake (someone who is making a lot of mistakes is said to be eating clam chowder)

Clean (cleen) adj. when a passage is technically correct, in the ensemble, and in unison. also tits; i.e. that lick was tits.

Clusterfuck (cluhs tur fuk) n. A set in which everyone is disoriented and misplaced.

Cop-a-squat (cop uh skwat) v. For one to squat down and take a knee during practice.

Cop Killer (cop kill ehr) n. Anybody who manages to bust their stick through a kevlar head.

Crutch (cruch) n. A part your director puts in to help the band keep tempo. Usually when the battery is not playing. Often top bass or snare captain playing on the quarters. ALSO Cheater beats. proper noun -- The one playing the notes.

Darth Vader (darth vader) proper noun Any kid on the line who has an asthma attack the first five minutes of practice.

Dink (dink) n. The smallest bass drum in a bass line.

Dirty (dur tee) adj. The precise opposite of clean - incorrect playing, style, and/or interpretation; playing out of ensemble, ticking out of the unison. also squalid, filthy

Do it up (doo iht upp) v. To do well; kick ass.

Doughboy (doh boy) n. Name given to one who is gasping for air after the first 15 minutes of practice.

Drummer wannabe (drum er wan nuh bee) n. Those horn players who insist on comming to the drums and beating them EVERY day. also everyone.

Druminese (drum uh neez) n. the universal language spoken by all drummers, using mouth sounds to imitate sounds made by different drums, Ex. gak for a rimshot on a kevlar snare.

Dut (duht) n. Chant used to keep time. also hut.

Duzh-da-duzh (duhzsh dah duhzsh) n. <1> To ask the drumline or section to play: as in "OK, let's go duzh-da-duzh".<2> Descriptive of the primarily "26-rudiments" --and thus musically limited-- writing/arranging, monotone sounding "play one volume and one tempo" style of the majority of pre-1967 drumlines: before different size bass drums, multi-tenors, pit, etc. were used.

Eargasm (eer gaz em) n. Climax of an incredible drum lick listening experience.

Egg Beater (egg beet ehr) n. A roll that is played RRRLLRRRLL etc. or can be played off theleft hand. Note - hands do not go same speed.

Eight Factorial (ate fac tore ee uhl) n. Taken from the mathematical factorial function (ex: 8x7x6x5x4x3x2x1), this is an "8 on a hand" exercise in which you play 8 notes on each hand, then 7, then 6, then 5, .... You can start at 16 and 32 too. Also optional is to build back up to the starting number.

Fake it (fayk it) v. To try to look like you know the part, while you are trying to remember the drill at the same time... when you really only know half the part.

Flash Flood (flash flud) n. What happens when one snare can't hack it, so the entire song gets watered down.

Flem (flehm) n. A flam that was so dirty, it sounded like somebody coughed it up.

Flintstone (flint ston) n. hybrid rudiment, consisting of a flammed dotted eigth note, tapped sixteenth, then 32nd note flam-five (sounds like "Meet the Flintstones")

Floater (flowt ehr) n. Short for a free-floating drum, where the tension lugs which tighten the head are not directly connected to the shell.

Fluff (fluhf) n. When the line sounds dirty, i.e., That was a bunch of fluff. (usually used when unappropriate things can't be said)

Freakin' Ree Ree (freek in ree ree) n. The guy on the end of the snare line who just can't quite get it - ever.

Frizbee (friz bee) n. Synonym for a cymbal. also plates

Fuhrer (fure ehr) n. The snare captain who acts like a dictator.

Futz-Ass (futz ass) n. Name for annoying band directors; who try to do things too fast, or just do dumb stuff, and always seems to screw the drumline.

Fuzz (fuhz) n. A quality of sound achieved when a snareline is on the brink of being clean; i.e., "Cadets were fuzzy in July, but they are piss clean for finals.

Gank (gangk ) v. <1> Making a big gash in your stick, caused by rimshot or just sucking. ie. I just ganked the shit out of my stick. <2> To steal something, i.e. That dude just ganked my stick! or Man, our instructor just ganked that part from Vanguard '90. also rip <3> East Coast terminology for skangk, see skangk

Gator Beatin' (gay tore beet in) v. Playing firmly into the drum head, thereby producing a good quality sound.

Geriatric (jerr ee a tric) adj. When a drummer holds his stick like he's crippled. also, when sticks are extremely out of playing position. i.e., Quit doin' those geriatrics and play normal!

Ghost (gost) v. To "fake-drum" - to take out notes of a passage you're playing but still air drum them like your playing it.

Gimpy (giv good hed) adj. <1> When a stick cracks and no longer gives the proper rebound (the gimpy stick causes the tick) <2> When you are not playing up to your usual ability; weak. (My chops are gimpy today).

Give Good Head (giv good hed) v. To play well.

Glory Boys (glore ee boyz) n. The kick-ass snareline. Also, alumni who are idolized by the instructors and the drummers.

Goal posts (gol postz) n. T-bar tan from wearing a harness, but not wearing a shirt.

Goat (goht) n. The percussion caption head. [attritributed to John R. Donovan, Jr.]

Gock (gahk ) n. <1> High pitched, approx 6in. drum on set of tenors, generally closest to the carrier. also sprock, gack, gawk, shot, shot drum, spank, spock, whacker, high pitched annoying thing. <2> A medium-high pitched sound made on a snare drum by hitting rim and head at the same time with the tip of the stick at the center of the drum head. also rim shot

Grabbing the bull by the balls (you can read) v. Taking a really hard lick and playing it so perfect, the whole band sounds awesome.

Grandma (gram ma) n. A rudiment consisting of alternating stroked 16thnotes with 32nd note right and left-handed paradiddles added in.

Grid (grihd) v. To take a rudiment (flam, diddle, etc.) and place it on the first, second, third, and fourth beats of a sixteenth note over a series of measures. Can also be done over triplets.

Hack (hak) v. <1> To improvise equipment (w/duct tape, etc.) <2> To play something stupid when you aren't supposed to be playing, caused by boredom and innate desire to hit your drum. (i.e. Quit hackin' or I'll kick your ass!)

Hatin' It (hayt in it) v. a state of being which is somewhat like suffering, i.e., "The snare drummer on the end of VK's line was hatin' it during the drum solo." "The tenor players are hatin' it, because their damn drums weigh a ton."

Helen Keller Line (hel in kehl ehr line) n. A drumline of bitch beaters with total disregard to dynamics and technique.

Helicopters (hel ih cop terz) n. see butterflies

Hell Raiser (hel rayz ehr) n. When you beat the hell outta the drum and the head snaps.

Hemiola (hee mee oh la) n. A violent and abrupt outburst of the battery during a show.

Hertah (her tah) n. Two 32nd notes immediately followed by two 16th notes. Roll the "r" Italian-style and it sounds like what it means.

Hurl (hurl) n. See "vomit".

Infinity Rolls (ihn fin ih tee rolz) n. A period of time where the line starts rolling and doesn't stop until the time period is over, usually starting out at a fast tempo and high stick height, depending on the skill and endurance level of the line. i.e., Tommorow we have to do infinity rolls for 15 min.

James sticking (jaymz stik ing) v. -playing any type of drum with a traditional-like style, only with the right hand flipped instead of the left.

Jiz (jiz) v. What one does when they hear an awesome line.

Lick (lik) n. Any part of a drum score, although usually concerning a solo or particularly difficult passage.

Life Guard (life gard) n. One snare line member, who gets the bag (who's getting everything watered down in the first place) to finally practice, thereby stopping all the watering.

Life Saver (life sayv er) n. The snare line's practice pads (Real Feals, etc) ie, Get out your life savers and practice that opener!

Marionette (mair ee uh neht) n. The drum major- he/she is merely a puppet for the band while the drums really keep the band together. also tool

Martin (mar tin) proper noun The freakin' ree-ree, pee-on, etc. who just won't stop hacking, gacking, and/or getting picked on. Also the guy most likely to go to a Trekkie convention.

Meathead (meet hed) n. Someone who thinks they're an incredible player who really isn't.

Million Flam Rule (mihl yun flam rool) n. The rule that states "One must play a million flams before one can play a perfect flam."

Monkey drum (muhn kee druhm) v. To "flail" each stroke, whipping the stick down and back very high, usually above your head.

Motherfucker (muh thur fuck er) n. <1> A flamadiddle that alternates hands. <2> The "sung" part for inside fives (one motherfucker two motherfucker)

Nerf Claves (nurf clah vayz) n. What you give the bag, freakin' ree ree,geriatric, stick jockey, or water boy to play. also Nerfwoodblock and Nerf cowbell.

Nipple (nipp uhl) n. Someone who is seriously out of formation when on the field. ie: "Hey man, you're the biggest damn nipple i've ever seen!"

Nirvana (nuhr vah na) n. A state of being achieved when you are playing a lick so effortlessly you give out an aura that you could play 10 times better than anyone else around you.

Notes (nohtz) n. A passage, or measure, that is very difficult because of the amount of notes that you play. i.e., You guys wanted some notes, so here they are.

Orville Redenbocker Line (or vil red en bock ehr lyn) n. a line that plays nothing but total popcorn.

Pacifier (pa sih fy er) n. something such as a wood block that the insane instructor hits to keep a line in time. i.e. - Do you want me to breakout the pacifier or are you good enough to play without it?

Paper Bag (pay per bahg) n. What one of the drums on a set of tenors sounds like with a busted casing.

Park-'n'-blow (park an blow) n. A part in a show where you just stand there and play; no marching. Usually during the drum solo, or for dramatic effect.

Peck (peck) v. To improv on any percussive instrument when you get bored, or when you are trying to annoy the crap out of sombody

Pecker (peck ehr) n. <1> A practice pad. i.e., Whip out your peckers and hack through the solo. <2> A title/derogative term for someone who constantly plays after the cutoff from the director, i.e., "Hey, pecker, quit hackin' before I shove this stick where the sun don't shine - SIDEWAYS!"

Pee-on (pee ohn) n. The annoying kid in the drumline that always get's picked on, kicked, or slaped with sticks. Also acts like it doesn't hurt at all. i.e., Leave Pee-on alone, he's bleeding.

Pimp (pimp) n. The center snare. adj Good; i.e., "That cadence was pimp."

Ping (ping) n. A gock (def. #2, or rim shot) played 2-3in. away from rim

Piss 'er down (piss ehr down) v. Take a break to get rid of some beer

Piss it (piss it) v. Make the roll so clean it sounds like someone urinating

Plates (playtz) n. Cymbals. also frizbee

Popcorn (pop corn) n. The result of snacking- i.e., "What the hell kind of feature was that those guys were trying to play? They were playing so dirty, it sounded like popcorn!"

Popeye Syndrome (pohp eye sin drome) n. The incredible burning sensation in the forearms after a difficult workout.

Pow wow circle (pow wow sirk uhl) n. When all the bass drummers in a line get together in a circle for a sectional, i.e. "Okay, it's time for our little pow-wow circle again, so we can get this feature right."

Prize Bitch (prize bitch) n. The freshman who is adored by the colorgard because he is "so unlike the drummers" and is therefore subject to scorn and humiliation. i.e., "Fulton is the guard's prize bitch."

Puss out (puss owt) v. To play too weakly or not play at all, i.e., Man, quit pussin' out on that roll.

Put your balls on the line (oh, you can say it) v. To align the balls of your feet with a yard line to set drill.

Ram (ramm) n. A passage in a song when players (bass drummers, etc.) go insanely fast.

Ram out (ramm owt) v. To play the drum, i.e. Man, that drumline was rammin' out some serious licks!

Rip (rip) n. A stolen drum score, i.e. That solo Frankfurter North played was a total Cadets rip.

Roll Stroll (roll stroll) n. Marching around playing intensely fast rolls for as long as an hour straight, thereby inducing Popeye Syndrome. see also infinity rolls.

RMFL (ar em ef el) adj. Real Mother Fucking Loud - above fortississimo. also LAF (Loud As Fuck).

Sack (sak) n. See bag.

Schlep (shlepp) v. To move equipment, such as moving keyboards to a show site.

Schlock (shlok) v. To play first attacks of accented patterns, rolls, diddles, etc.. as dirty as humanly possible. i.e., "What is this, Schlock-Fest `97?!"

Scoop (scoop) n. A sound projector attached to the bottom of a snare drum.

Set the Table (set tha taybuhl) v. Position the cymbals in front of the battery at ride or hi-hat carry for the battery to play on. (Get it - cymbals = plates = set the table?)

Sha goink (sha goyngk) n. What gets accomplished when the instructor is not around.

Shank (shangk) n. Torque wrench or power key.

Shit the bed (shitt tha bedd) v. To blatently suck beyond belief, i.e. "You guys are reallyshittin the bed on that lic...."

Shiznit (shiz niht) n. A really clean passage, where all the drummers"groove" to the beat.

Shut 'er down (shutt ur down) v. To end practice. i.e., "It's 9:00, timeto shut 'er down."

Skangk (skangk) n. A tenor note where you hit the lowest or second lowest pitched of the set of tenors, then immedietely put your hand on the drum head to muffle the sound, giving a quick attack and sharp cutoff - it sounds like it's name. East Coast = gank

Slap on the hogs (slapp on tha hogz) v. Put on your drums. also load 'em up, strap 'em on, mount up

Smoking (smohk ing) adj. Outstanding. A "smoking" show is one that totally blows the judges hair off and all the fans start to run away because it hurts their ears.

Solo taco (soh loh tah coh) n. Something played which is totally wrong, not even CLOSE to whatactually should be played. i.e. Hey wrong page man, dont go Solo taco on me.

Spank (spangk) v. To hit the drum.

Spankophone (spangk uh phon) n. The sprock drum or the bottom bass drum of the battery line. (used by Brian Mason)

Splinter (splint ehr) n. The pit player who breaks all of the mallets.

Spree (spree) n. A drumline's exercise in which they play all of their meat such as flam drags, cheeses, cheese chuchuttas.

Sprock (sprock) n. See "gock".

Sprock Spank (sprock spangk) n. a lick in which the sprock drum (or etc, see above) is hit repetiativly on accents, flams, drags, or open rolls/sweeps.

Snack (snack) v. see shit the bed

Snackum (snack um) n. One who snacks.

Stick Jockey (stik jock ee) n. A drummer who sucks so much they are demoted from the battery, straight to equipment manager. ie. "That freakin' ree ree is headed for stick jockey."

Stick The Cymbal (stik tha sim bull) n. Game played by drummers as follows: One drummer stands at an end of the parking lot waiting on waldo with his sticks...then the cymbal boys stand at the other end of the p.lot then the snare player whales his stick at the cymbals and if he hits one he gets a point..first to 10 wins

Superman (soup ehr mann) n. The lug-rim attachment on a bass drum. Named so because when taken off the drum, they look like little flying men.

Sweep (sweep) n. Tenor terminology for a rapid double stroke over two drums. also rake

Swiss Aarons (swiss air onz) n. Sixteenth notes with a flam on thedownbeat. Sticking is R, R, R, L (or L, L, L, R). Should sound like flam-paraddidles.

Tachutta (tuh chuht ah) n. Triplets with accents on the downbeats, and every SECOND notehas an unaccented flam.

Throw down (thro down) v. To play the drum. also ram out, spank

Tick (tik) n. A pulsed roll, unclean flam-drag, or any other technical error that makes the song sound worse.

Tighter than a virgin's daughter (you can pronounce it yourself) phrase ... How one should tune a marching snare drum.

Tony the Fireman (toh nee thah fyr man) proper noun -- The instructor who hoses all your parts.

Toy (toy) n. any item that can be attached to a marching drum (Cowbells, Jam Blocks, Ride Cymbals, Hi hats, Ribbon Crashers, Spoxe, Crotales, Granite Blocks, etc.)

Trainwreck (trayn rek) n. when the drumline as a whole shits the bed, thus causing the band to....shit the bed.

Trek (trek) v. To march a long distance with just the drumline. Usually done to practice a piece (ie: the cadence) with marching. "Let's trek the cadence for a couple miles." see also roll stroll

Uggh (uggh) intrjct. What you say instead of playing the right notes. also shit, huh, etc.
Example - When you have a great lick going and your top bass just happens to miss a nine stroke roll at the climax and says "Shit!" instead; right when no one else is playing.

Urination Vacation (yur uh nay shun vay cay shun) n. When a band member takes a piss break and never returns to practice.

Vibe (vibe) n. The intensity that a drumline or a drummer produces while playing,evident by their body language/facial expression.

Virgin Stick (ver jin stik) n. A new stick that has never been played with.

Visual (vizh yoo uhl) n. Something the percussionist does to add a visual texture to a song (twirls, back-sticking, fake-sticking, drum to drum, etc.)

Vitamins (vy tah minz) n. Any roll endurance exercise. see infinity roll

Vomit (vah mit) n. An anticipated shitting of the bed; i.e., "Uh oh, here comes the tenor vomit." also hurl

Waldo (wahl doh) proper noun -- The guy who always wanders off, and nobody can find him; i.e., "All right guys, let's run the opener....Hey! Where's Waldo?!"

Water (wah ter) v. To simplify a drum score. also hose

Water Boy (wah ter boy) n. Someone who sucks, for whom you must water the part down.

War Club (wahr club) n. A heavy or heavily taped stick.

Way out (way owt) adj. The worst you could possibly play...to not even come close to playing with the line, worse than a tick; i.e., "Dude, you are just way-out on those inverts in the closer."

Wet-mouth (wett mowth) n. Any drooling bando who is paralyzed with amazement in the parking lot or in the stands.

Whackerball (whack er ball) n. A drum game played by setting the quints on the ground sothe gock ("whacker") is up like a basket, then sitting about five feet away and trying to get a small paper ball (about the size of a golf ball) into thewhacker. Get three in a row, and you move to round two, where a stick iswaved in front of the whacker. Get three more in a row and go onto round 3 where two sticks are waved in front of the whacker. Get those next three in a row in and you win.

Whacktissimo (whack tiss ih mo) adj. See "ballzando".

Zorro (zohr oh) n. A really dirty sticks-out.