"Big Dan" Ingram
The only qualification for becoming a [radio personality] is the ability to defecate in less than 3 minutes.

Kay Ingram
Women prefer men who have something tender about them - especially the legal kind.

Irish blessing
May God grant you always...A sunbeam to warm you, A moonbeam to charm you, a sheltering angel, so nothing can harm you.

Washington Irving
An inexhaustible good nature is one of the most precious gifts of heaven, spreading itself like oil over the troubled sea of thought, and keeping the mind smooth and equable in the roughest weather.

Washington Irving
A kind heart is a fountain of gladness, making everything in its vicinity freshen into smiles.