word.life.poetry. expound on whatever. social conscience. random thoughts. one love.

rain sucks. it's just more of an excuse to stay home and masturbate.
posted by Ed C. at 9:09 PM

Oh no! I wasn't criticizing bud. Heck, it was 6 in the morning. hee hee -- That's too late/early to criticize anything. No way do I think you're shallow. Anyways, what I meant was the broader question to seek an answer for might be what to do if anyone were on the street crying. If it were me, I'd probably feel better if someone said something too (atleast to keep my mind off of whatever I was upset about). But, I would think that there are plenty of people who get hecka savage and don't want anybody to even walk by them, let alone say a few words of concern. That sucks. Well, dang! If they don't want to be noticed or have concern sent their way... then get the frick out the street, ya know?!?!? heheh okay... that's 4 cents now. I'll stop. Have a great weekend ya'll! Until next week...
posted by Avon Angeles at 3:21 PM

Yeah, i meant to follow it up by asking, if it would be different than how you responded to an unattractive person. Please don't think me shallow. I speak to all people, but if they're crying I don't know. It happened yesterday and she wasn't "attractive" per se but it I was thinking about what to do so long that she was down the block and I was still late to work. I thought that asking the question would help prepare me for the next time. If it was me crying, someone saying something would make me feel better even if they couldn't help
posted by Richarde Peter at 10:15 AM

Okay, it's like almost 6 in the frickin' morning and I'm still not asleep. I know, I know INSOMNIAC! But, a few hours of dancing and drinking a little at good 'ol "Club Sogas" (as the gourmet restaurant turned night club on Thursday nights is called) is enough to keep me awake atleast for a few more minutes. You'd think I'd be dead tired right now, but I don't know... maybe I'm just looking forward to the weekend. Maybe I'm waiting for the day to begin so that it can finish faster. Then, I can start my weekend and just chill. That would be grrreeeat!

Anyways, at 6 in the morning without sleep I felt compelled to answer Richarde's question. So, if I don't make any sense.. sorry :) Hmm... what to do when an attractive person is crying on the street... I suppose a better question would be, what to do when ANYBODY is crying on the street (whether they're attractive or not). I think I'm a pretty compassionate person and would proably ask if they were okay. But a part of me is kind of scared to even attempt it for fear that they may be in such emotional trauma that he/she would get up in my face and tell me to "MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS" in a very LOUD and UNSTABLE manner!! Eeek! Scary! Damn! In that case.. I'd rather just walk on by and ignore them... I don't need the aggravation or the stress. hee hee :) Anyways, that's my 2 cents... Night y'all. Avon go beddie bye...
posted by Avon Angeles at 5:49 AM

This stupid FTP thing is pissing me off. WTF!!!
posted by Jonah Park at 2:25 AM

true true.
posted by Ed C. at 10:52 PM

Re: the de Guzman incident

About the media thing, I don't recall them saying that he was Fil-Am. I only assumed it after seeing his mugshot and his last name. I know the Chronicle hasn't mentioned his ethnicity in any of its stories.. yet. I dunno if it's true for the other media outlets. I don't think we should be too worried about this incident giving Fil-Ams a bad name. This is the Bay Area after all, where we make up a big chunk of the population. Instead, we should worry more about people like him who decide to manifest their anger in a destructive way. There have been many young people in the past who have felt the same way he has, hating authority, believing the world is going downhill. I know some of us might even sympathize with some of his beliefs. It would have been better if he channeled his anger into something more positive. Also, why didn't his family notice his arsenal? How come one of his friends, who saw the bombs, didn't ask him what was up with em? Maybe, like the "Trench Coat Mafia," he was ostracized back in high school or middle school. I'm sure some of us had a pretty rough time back then. I know I did. I shunned most of the Filipino community at my high school cuz I didn't really see eye-to-eye with em. I couldn't really relate to them. I never got invited to their birthday parties, cotillions, or the like. I know my sister felt the same about them too. Perhaps when "he really needed their love/attention/companionship they shunned him."

about "reality" shows.. they'll crash as quickly as they came up. I'm waiting for the fallout.

and well, about the "purity" thing, it seems "pure" people are few and far between. hopefully there'll be a few still around.. you know who you are *ahem*.

my favorite commercial is this one that my co-worker pointed out to me, a PSA that was on recently.. a bunch of kids are at a party, and somebody gets handed a pipe, and he/she says "naw, it's cool" and passes it on.. the theme of it is "It's Okay to Pass," and my co-worker says, "[presumably] meaning a joint, a bong, or a pipe." hehe, she cracks me up.
posted by Robbz one at 4:02 PM

What do you think about all the media coverage concerning the dog scare in the bay area?
posted by Jonah Park at 1:18 PM

So many things I could comment on. where to start.

*I like the new beer commercials with Cedric the Entertainer. Especially the one where he gets all excited and gives the girl a beer shower. It was like he had a bottle of champagne and she was a Centerfolds dancer and they were in a Dr. Dre video.

*I heard Robert Smith is going to Med. school and he used to get in trouble by his coaches in college for wanting to go to class instead of practice. Kind of adds some depth to the topic, huh? It's no worse than Jordan going out on top. It's a personal decision. Now if only Jerry Rice would take a hint.

*I believe that Iverson did no worse than the fans did. He's just a bigger story to sell. Jimmy Buffet got kicked out of this past weekends Knicks-Heat game. If you've ever been to a game you know that the fans are no angels. As for the fining, it's more the league making a public showing of discipline since it got caught on tape on national tv. If it wasn't you wouldn't hear much about it.

*That Pacey/Joey thing surprised the hell out of me. Next week though Dawson confronts her. Will she lie or not? Some folks lie about being pure. In theory you would want someone who has not been around alot, but there is a lot of fumbling around to learn what to do and what works and doesn't, and experience might take some of that away. If you are a virgin then who ever you get with is going to represent a whole population. How do you know it was the bomb tang unless you have something to compare it to. As long as you're handling business and doing your best, it shouldn't matter as long as you're making the effort to improve.

* and my question- if you see an attractive person crying on the street, what do you do
posted by Richarde Peter at 10:59 AM

Hey y'all... Otis has been buggin' me about not participating... so, HERE I AM! :) hehehhe sorry about the delay. Anyways, okay... this is kind of my first time at web logging. So, I suppose I'll just begin by blabbing about whatever as most bloggers do. hee hee

Well, some friends of mine have been emailing each other back and forth on the topic of their favorite TV commercial. I particularly enjoy the Welches grape juice commercials. I think the kids who do those are sooo cute and really smart!! But, I think my most recent favorite is the one where the "Dorito Girl" gets smacked in the head with a Dorito chip. HAHAHAHAH cracks me up everytime I see it. If you've never seen it, check out MTV. They show that dang commercial at pretty much every frickin' commercial break! :)

How 'bout you guys?? What are your favorite commercials?
posted by Avon Angeles at 3:01 AM

hey guys..my name's ash
posted by Ashley Lagman at 7:09 PM

[ MEDIA REGURGITATION 2/7/2001 ]

- Viking RB Robert Smith retired from the NFL this morning, at the PEAK of his career. He had been injury prone, but brimming with potential all of his previous seven years. This past yeaer, he became the NFC leading rusher. He was a free agent, so he was set to earn a whole ishload of money the upcoming years. YET, he retired. What do you think about this?

- Stacy from the first Survivor is suing the show for being rigged. Do you think it was rigged? Does it really matter to the show? Does it matter to Survivor 2?

- The other day, Allen Iverson got in trouble for calling a fan a derogatory homophobic name. He was fined by the NBA even though the fan was taunting Allen Iverson with racial slurs. Do you think his fining was a proper punishment, why or why not?

- Tonight, Joey's gonna get her flower knocked the hell out of her boots tonight on Dawson's Creek. Do you think that hoping for an innocent girl/boy (for ed) is just a pipedream? Would you rather get with an experienced partner or one who is still feeding the flower? If you are an experienced person, is it fair to search for a partner who is inexperienced (completely)?
posted by Jonah Park at 6:21 PM

[community meeting notes... in a nutshell]

- Basically, there was a lot of concern that the media would over expose Mr. Al de Guzman being a Filipino American, thus leading to a stigma against the community as gun-toting, unabombing bastards. What do you think about this?

- What resulted were comments about shame and an inability.. or an unwillingness of Filipino American parents to address their familial problems. IE: Just as long as their kid is doing well in school, all other problems are nonexistent. They also noted that Filipino American parents are scared to admit to themselves and the community that their kid may have a problem because it looks bad on them as parents. Being that the Filipino culture is heavily dependent upon valus of shame such issues as mental disease, child neglect, sex, etc. are not properly addressed.

- People noted that Mr. de Guzman was extremely good at mechanics (thus having the ability to put together bombs.) Had he been able to channel this talent better, he would've been a creater instead of a potential destroyer.

- A lot of community organizations including FYC and community leaders (Fil Am/ city) attended all giving their thoughts on the situation.

- Some addressed concern for students at Independence High and De Anza. Concern was also shared for the de Guzman family.

- Overall, the main idea that was brought forth was that COMMUNICATION IS KEY. Had there been better communication between the de Guzman family, friends, etc., maybe the parents could've steered their kid away from the path he took. As well, there was a definite point that Filipino Americans have many resources to go to in case they need family counseling for whatever the reasons ( San Jo area) but many of the programs can not fill up their clientele sheets. This is discussed to be the fault of SHAME and fear of STIGMA.

- What do you think?
posted by Jonah Park at 6:11 PM

hEiErO: did you see ed's post?
hEiErO: all he talks about is sex..
hEiErO: i think his sexual expression is a result of his sexual oppression
DoGGz1: haha
DoGGz1: yah i saw that
DoGGz1: maybe he did it in retaliation for your "ed is gay" subtleties
DoGGz1: =P
hEiErO: well.. he hasn't denied anything
DoGGz1: hehe
posted by Jonah Park at 5:56 PM

somebody needs to get laid *ahem ahem*......i'm sure Mr. Yap will accomodate Mr. Fuertes.
posted by Ed C. at 1:36 PM

damn.
posted by Jonah Park at 8:56 AM

"V-Day"

i almost forgot that the damned day was coming up. the only reason why i remember is because someone at the office left out a bunch of those cheesy hearts that say lovey-dovey crap like "Real Love" and "Fax Me." awww sheeeeeeeyit, how cute *sarcasm*. then one of my friends writes about some stuff on his homepage where "it's beginning to feel a lot like Valentine's." all that talk makes me barf up the bile and hydrochloric acid in my stomach, not to mention the Popeye's chicken from yesterday. another holiday foisted upon us by the greeting-card industry. in the great words of eminem, "I Just Don't Give a F*ck!"

---

oh about the freeway shootings.. those damn Lakeview kids must be acting up again. the usual Ess Eff stuff.
posted by Robbz one at 1:59 AM

[Hagedorn]

An old filipino man goes before the judge for his citizenship papers. The manong's really nervous. He's been in America since 1930, waiting for his Big moment all his life.
The judge isn't too friendly. He says, "Excuse me, Mr. Manong, but before you can get your citizenship papers, I must order you to compose a correct sentence in English, using the following words: deduct, defense,defeat, and detail."
The manong jumps up and down with excitement. "Ay! Very easy, judge.Very easy.See? De duck jump over de fence. First de feet , den de tail!"

The same judge decides to test the manong even further.
"Mr. Manong, I'd like you to use the English word persuading corectly in a sentence."
The manong is once again eager to please. "No problem, judge! Last month I went to my sister's pirst wading anniversary party."
The judge is appalled, but gives the old man another chance.
"Mr. Manong, do you know the word devastation?"
The manong smiles. "Of course, judge! I know that word! De-bas-tay-shon. That's where i go to wait for the bus."
posted by a fortun at 3:22 PM

Innuendo-

I arrive at
two elongated peninsulas
forming a cove of paradise
where the coral is inviting
though scratchy.
The sun splits
the darkness that blankets me
and I feel my way to shore.
Explore the recesses
of rocks with smooth soft covering
to find you.

I speak in tongues
to your lips.
You respond
in guttural melodies.

I go to work to set up shelter
beneath your eyes,
your hands that dually
tickle and swirl like tropic wind gusts,
and knead the muscles in my back, neck, and skull.
I fight the urge
to fall to slumber
on the beach
above the brush.

Delivered rush
takes its toll
as the sweat beads
and the stroking
post coital surge
flees the trees
to brighten
the moon.
posted by Richarde Peter at 11:01 AM

i have a crush, but i think he doesn't want to commit right now, to anyone.so is it wrong that i still let him know how i feel and find out how he feels, or is it best for it to stay a crush and not say anything at all. i was never good at telling anyone how i felt for them, and its not any easier now.but isn't there times when u feel like he/she is worth it, to risk your friendship or whatever it is that you may have with them. thats my greatest fear of losing that connection after everything is said. i sorta get that same feeling sometimes in that scene when you watch Julia Roberts in "My Best Friends Wedding" when shes on the boat with...damn i forget his name...but you know "the guy",and he's talking about when you love someone you should just say it outloud before the moment passes you by...and u could tell she wanted to tell him, but she didn't. but then this isn't a good example cuz in the end she does tell him how she feels but she doesn't get the guy =P but thats ok, she only loved him so much cuz she felt she was going to lose him. maybe she should have let him know sooner then waiting til the last minute. anyways i think i lost track of what i was going to say...so i'll just stop here.
posted by a fortun at 10:24 AM

[cheese]

the sun shines upon my page,
as I read the chapters
of your book. I'm shook.
the next chapter, yet to be written,
i'm shaking,
I want to be the author.

i've waited in regret,
I could've wrote, before,
or at least, attempted to,
at least.
but from my silent mouth,
came envious eyes,
and a yearning heart,
because I knew my words
were so much better.

the sun shines
on faded pages of waves
of uncertainty,
the waves you rode,
the waves I struggled to float upon.
i waded, i waited
and almost drowned in
pitiful sorrow,
but now, there is a tomorrow,
a new day which I can compose.

you are an illumination
of an otherwise desolate world,
because you make me smile,
and that is pure beauty,
and the laughter of satisfaction
you bless me with,
is uncontrollable. i feel whole.

the sun shines on a story
yet to be finished,
yet to have begun,
a story begging for my pen
to bring to life
for your sake and mine.
we can vibe to a rhythm,
if you allow, now...
because i have waited,
for the clouds to float by,
and the rains to dry,
for a moment of sunlight,
that I can eternalize,
as I write.

posted by Jonah Park at 3:15 AM

well as they say, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. but what can I say? I'm not even 21 yet. "Enjoy life... Eat out more often" (TM) - something I saw on an S.E. Rykoff truck.
posted by Robbz one at 1:57 AM

my supervisor and I were talking the other day (after that town hall meeting) and he was saying that all of his past girlfriends have been very similar to his first EX. All the other girls who showed up in the picture, just left. =P What I mean is that, though the chance for something different was interesting at first, in the end, that "novelty" faded. It is nothing against those girls.. but it just didn't feel right.

So.. I had to agree. And though I don't think my EX prolly isn't the greatest girlfriend I could've had, her "type" is what I became accustomed to... and therefore, that is what I am comfortable with. It's not as if i compare, but you just know when something doesn't feel right. It's unfortunate, but it happens. On the same boat, I am not hung up on my EX, but that is just what I'm used to.

interesting enough.. on tuesday, I will be going to SF State and kicking it with my friend who I had the fattest crush on in high school. This was a crazy crush. But anyway, it was just my luck that I had to be there on Tuesday for a meeting.. and she had school that day. So, I'm on my way to at least applying for a teaching credential program.. and I'll also get a chance to kick it with my friend. =P

now.. joy just IMed me: "seems like you don't have very much luck with the girls". and.. i guess this is true in a way. I've been blessed with the opportunities of meeting and "dating" very nice girls, but unfortunately, nothing has come from them.. you know, just cuz they didn't feel right. I've been single since 1997 (technically..) and I haven't had a chance to settle with anyone. Maybe it's cuz I have long standing crushes that I feel need to be resolved before I move on. Actually.. i think that's it. Unless I meet someone who just blows my mind, then I'm stuck on established crushes... geez.
posted by Jonah Park at 1:54 AM

you know what else?

recently, i've been battling the thoughts of whether I was digging my "carefree" single life.. or if I wanted to settle down. and basically.. my answer is:

i want to settle down... but only if I can with a choice of certain people. Nuff said. Bleh.
posted by Jonah Park at 1:27 AM

okay. this is irritating.

i guess this is somewhat of a stretched response to my question, but I'm irritated.

okay. well, i spent the better part of the time between Fall 1997 til a few months ago trippin off a girl.. who happens to be a friend.. who happened to have a boyfriend.. who happens to have ties to other chicks.. who happens to be one of two girls that i'd stop and just give myself to (not like that).. and now.. who happens to be single. AND, despite the fact that I prolly don't have a chance in hell, I was advised by someone that.. if I garnered such strong feelings for someone, it would be pointless to not ever say anything. BUT, I never could say anything cuz of the boyfriend... but now, it might be too late.

in the past i wondered whether to wait or not. and now that the girl is single.. i think it's too late. but i'm thinking about just saying something anyway. might as well, right? she's in davis. I'm moved away already. if it feels weird, at least we have physical distance for us to get over the weirdness, right? I dunno. I was 2 seconds.. and a pair of balls.. away from telling her that I was "interested".. but I didn't. Then she got into something else.. =/

now.. i don't wanna cause drama. But. don't you feel me? If you think the person is just THAT DOPE.. (girl.. or boy [for ed]) and you couldn't ever say it cuz of the boyfriend (ed's situation applies here), wouldn't you want to? Just to be fair to yourself?

What you think?
posted by Jonah Park at 1:22 AM

hehe.. john has an active imagination doesn't he? 8)
posted by Robbz one at 12:42 AM